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STATISTICS PROVE DAN DIERDORF IS

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  • STATISTICS PROVE DAN DIERDORF IS



    I divided announcers' verbal infractions into six categories that are not simply pet peeves, but likely to be annoyances for a majority of NFL viewers:

    1. Clichés: a lazy conjecture presented as an explanation for an event on the field.

    "They believe they can win."

    "It's all about courage and no fear."

    "[Player X] has a burning desire to get it done."
    I also categorized a comment as a cliché if the commentator offered some form of "this team playing poorly needs to play less poorly".

    "I always think it's important to get off to a good start."

    "[Team X] has gotta keep [their opponent] out of the end zone in terms of a touchdown here."
    All the above examples are from one quarter of one game.

    2. Factual Errors: These are statements presented as fact that can be disproved in the moment by the average football viewer without additional research. Many of these were events the viewer could see better than the commentators.

    3. Nonsense: Admittedly, this is a catch-all category for when commentators say something that simply makes no sense. Such a category is unavoidably subjective to a degree, but I counted instances only where a commentator said something truly foolish, rambled incoherently or demonstrated a misunderstanding of a word's meaning. Many are context-specific. Some examples:

    "I'll tell you, about this Chiefs offense, we talked about it on the pregame show I did with Bill Cowher. Can they continue on like this without getting the big plays? We can see the potential's there. And I'll tell you this, that this offensive line, which is young, youngest in the NFL, all high draft picks, if they get it together, its going to change this football team entirely."

    "That is huge for Le'Veon Bell, that six-yard gain." [It was a six-yard gain on first down on the first drive in the first quarter.]

    "A good challenge but maybe not worth the challenge."
    4. Self-References: The inspiration for this category came from an old Dr. Z column in which he correctly points out that announcers should never talk about themselves. So any time an announcer talked about himself during the game, it was counted here. Anecdotes regarding what they ate for lunch, what they ate for dinner, what they ate yesterday (most of them were about food, really) were all counted. Most announcers rarely did this, which was a pleasant surprise.

    5. Plays Off: This one is straightforward: If you're a play-by-play commentator, you have one job. If the whistle blows and you haven't said a word about the play that just occurred, you took a play off. (This category counted against only the play-by-play commentator, since color commentators bear no responsibility here.)

    6. Off Topic: Related to self-references, but these don't have to be about the announcers themselves. Any topic unrelated to the current football game was counted. Are you talking about the current quarterback's college days? Fine. Are you talking about the current quarterback's college roommate who isn't in this game? Off topic.

    After charting all 32 games, I collected 650 data points through these six categories, or 20 infractions per game. Some announcers had fewer. Others had many, many more



    After all is said, here are your Bad Commentator Awards:

    Worst Crew: Chris Myers and Tim Ryan

    Least-Bad Crew: Dick Stockton and Ronde Barber

    CBS vs. Fox: Fox has the less-bad crews, with 37 infractions per crew beating out CBS's 45.

    Worst Prime-time Crew: Mike Tirico and Jon Gruden (ESPN)

    Worst Commentator: Dan Dierdorf

    The mute button is your friend.




    http://www.sportsonearth.com/article/66008790/

  • #2
    Originally posted by TheReverend View Post
    That invalidates the entire piece.
    it was over two games.....if Dierdorf is the worst, than there is some validity to his scoring.


    god damn it...I can't go back and edit the title!!

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    • #3
      Homerism award or Anti Franchise Award?

      I vote Collinsworth.

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      • #4
        Yeah TNF is the worst. Even if they don't do as much wrong as the scoring here indicates, none of it works.

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        • #5
          It's hard to be worse than Gruden, but Dierdorf gets it done.

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          • #6
            I think Gruden is so bad he's hilarious.

            What sets him apart is that he's not afraid to rip the refs or the players.

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            • #7
              I find Mayock far more intolerable than Gruden, as bad as Gruden is.

              For those of you that watch hockey, Mayock is the Pierre McGuire of the NFL. Congratu-****ing-lations, you saw this guy at his pro day!

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              • #8
                Gruden is awesome. You guys are nuts.

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                • #9
                  Was anyone able to understand Michael Irving last sunday? He's always difficult to understand and animated but he seemed straight up drugged/drunk slurring.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Meck77 View Post
                    Was anyone able to understand Michael Irving last sunday? He's always difficult to understand and animated but he seemed straight up drugged/drunk slurring.
                    I like how Irving will do anything to get ahead in such a cutthroat industry.

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                    • #11
                      Phil simms bar none is the worst. If you listen you can hear his gag reflex when calling pats games.

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Meck77 View Post
                        Was anyone able to understand Michael Irving last sunday? He's always difficult to understand and animated but he seemed straight up drugged/drunk slurring.
                        I have seen him like that several times in 13.
                        Deion and other cohosts act almost embarrassed.
                        Last edited by whoeey; 12-17-2013, 12:54 PM.

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                        • #13
                          I miss John Madden.

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                          • #14
                            I like how people add a "g" to both Irvin and Collinsworth, resulting in "Irving" and "Collingsworth". The same people probably go to the "libary" to get books.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by whoeey View Post
                              I have seen him like that several times in 13.
                              Deion and other cohosts act almost embarrassed.
                              Someone compiled some clips from Nov. It's official. He's a drunk idiot.

                              Hopefully he gets his ass fired soon.

                              http://philly.barstoolsports.com/aro...rk-last-night/

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