What really grinds my gears and other fantastic things...

[Jason in LA]

You know another thing that grinds my gears? Facebook. That damn thing makes it hard to have an active dating life. I don't friend request women I date (I think that's a huge mistake), and I don't like it when women hit me up on facebook. People can get the wrong impression really quick. I can communicate with a woman in person, over the phone, text message, and email. So do we also have to be facebook friends?!?!

I think a lot of people use it as a crutch. One female friend I have (I used to date her but now we're just friends, weird, I guess it is possible). So she was telling me that she has met guys, and instead of them asking for her number, they go on their phone and send her a facebook request, right there on the spot! WTF?!?! It's weird, and she gets annoyed by it. Like, we just met and now we have to be facebook friends? Guys need to sack up and just ask for the number.

[crawdad]

Bottles (Gatorade, G2, soda) that require a torque wrench to remove the cap. Pill bottles (containers) that require a mechanic to get at the medicine.

[broncocalijohn]

Originally Posted by crawdad

Bottles (Gatorade, G2, soda) that require a torque wrench to remove the cap. Pill bottles (containers) that require a mechanic to get at the medicine.

All of us under 50 are saying, "What?" It is age my friend. Next OM weekend, bring all your bottles of pills and line them up at the bar and we will help you make them old adult proof. You then can chase it with beer.....out of a sippy cup. At least we know what the gatorade is for now. You trying to open all your daily pills gets you pooped out and you need to re-energize yourself.

[crawdad]

Funny, John! Your time is coming!

[gunns]

Originally Posted by strafen

I'm his b****?!
That's pretty hilarious.
You're more of an ass sucker than I'm his b****.
By reading what you're saying, you sound angry. Are you the real homo here?

I'm married, BTW.

Your fear is glaring. You are the one that sounds angry. Is it anger that you may be found out? By yourself?

A lot of gay guys are married. The closest door is still shut. Come on out, be free.

[Gort]

Originally Posted by Jason in LA

Not having a plan is a good way to fail. lol Back when I didn't have a plan I was spending too much money on dates that weren't leading to anything.

I have an active dating life. If I'm spending $100+ for dates then I'm going to go broke. So I need a plan. And the amount you spend doesn't enhance having a good time and some good laughs. I can give a woman great times by spend $40 or $150, so what's the point of spending a lot of money when it really doesn't make a difference. And if I'm giving her a great time, she's not worried that it's only costing $40. If she's not having a good time, spending $150 isn't going to fix it. Now I don't do cheap dates. You can totally impress a woman by taking her to the Beverly Hills Hotel and spend less than $60. She'll be thinking, "most guys take me to Red Lobster, but he took me to the Beverly Hills Hotel." lol

Really thinking about it, a few years back I ended up on a park bench with a woman and we talked until 5am. We had a great time and she ended up being my girlfriend a month later. I didn't spend a dime on her that night, but it was that night that she fell for me.

So the point is, there is no need to spend a lot of money on a date, so why do it?

why don't you just tell the women up front on the first date that you expect sex that night and you expect them to pay you for it?

i mean if you're going to play the "douchebag" card on the first date, why not go all in?

[TailgateNut]

Originally Posted by WhoIsJohnGalt

why don't you just tell the women up front on the first date that you expect sex that night and you expect them to pay you for it?

i mean if you're going to play the "douchebag" card on the first date, why not go all in?

No wonder they had to invent civil unions for some people to be able to get laid!

[broncocalijohn]

Originally Posted by WhoIsJohnGalt

why don't you just tell the women up front on the first date that you expect sex that night and you expect them to pay you for it?

i mean if you're going to play the "douchebag" card on the first date, why not go all in?

Are you a chick? What part of that is douche? He is correct, if you think you need to spend a ton of money on a date, it shows you dont have enough imagination or a personality to have a good time. As for your question, it would be a good idea but Jason doesnt want to come off as a John. He is willing to do it for free as most guys do. You have fun spending your paycheck to impress the opposite sex. Jason and others will use their brain, looks, personality and power to get the ladies.

[Jason in LA]

Originally Posted by WhoIsJohnGalt

why don't you just tell the women up front on the first date that you expect sex that night and you expect them to pay you for it?

i mean if you're going to play the "douchebag" card on the first date, why not go all in?

Douche? You mean I'm a douche for taking a woman out to a very nice place, showing her a great time, and paying for all of it, without even approaching sex on the first date? Yeah, women should avoid dating me. One thing that makes my approach work is that if you actually talk to women, and make them laugh, they'll really like you. Who knew? Having a great conversation for a long period of time will get you farther than spending over $100 on dinner alone.

At the end of one first date I had this one woman said "this is the most refreshing date I've had in a long time." And before you jump to conclusions about the guys she's been dating, it wasn't because she was dating bad guys. It was because the guys didn't know how to properly plan the first date. I've heard first date horror stories from women, and I just don't get what some guys are thinking.

Now if women knew going in what was behind the curtain they probably would have your same reaction. But when they see the presentation they're all in. I told one woman that I dated what my plan is on a first date (I told her this a year after our first date). She laughed and said that it worked like magic on her.

One more thing, I have one female friend that said that she really doesn't want to do dinner on the first date, and that drinks is the best way to go because she can bail out at any time. I've come to find out that a lot of women think that same way.

[Jason in LA]

Originally Posted by broncocalijohn

Are you a chick? What part of that is douche? He is correct, if you think you need to spend a ton of money on a date, it shows you dont have enough imagination or a personality to have a good time. As for your question, it would be a good idea but Jason doesnt want to come off as a John. He is willing to do it for free as most guys do. You have fun spending your paycheck to impress the opposite sex. Jason and others will use their brain, looks, personality and power to get the ladies.

Yeah, I don't get some guys. If you plan it right you don't have to spend a lot of money, and if you can hold an entertaining conversation you're in like Flynn! How many times do women say that they want a guy that they can talk to? Be funny and save the money! lol

[underrated29]

Its as easy as that....

When I date I never ever put us in a situation that can result in an awkward silence. Ever!


I always have something going on. Lets face it. You are new to each other, there is only so much you can say until you know them. So I always do something that allows us to get to know one another up to that point, but also has enough going on that A- there will be no awkward silences, B- I or she can bail out, C-use or get some sort of distraction/fun to keep things going.



My fav thing is the place that you go to and cook your own food. They teach you how to cook/prepare it, but you have to do it yourselves. Perfect! Quiet enough to get to know one another, but still active enough that conversation does not have to be going 100% of the time. Active and fun, plus gives room to flirt and make physical contact....no not that kind....just a bump, a touch on the hand etc.....

No matter the girl, this works everytime.

[Crushaholic]

Originally Posted by Jason in LA

You know another thing that grinds my gears? Facebook. That damn thing makes it hard to have an active dating life. I don't friend request women I date (I think that's a huge mistake), and I don't like it when women hit me up on facebook. People can get the wrong impression really quick. I can communicate with a woman in person, over the phone, text message, and email. So do we also have to be facebook friends?!?!

I absolutely agree with this. Until you commit to that person, you're just asking for trouble if you become their Facebook "friend"...

[Gort]

Originally Posted by broncocalijohn

Are you a chick? What part of that is douche? He is correct, if you think you need to spend a ton of money on a date, it shows you dont have enough imagination or a personality to have a good time. As for your question, it would be a good idea but Jason doesnt want to come off as a John. He is willing to do it for free as most guys do. You have fun spending your paycheck to impress the opposite sex. Jason and others will use their brain, looks, personality and power to get the ladies.

ok, so maybe i was being a bit hard on him. he's a big boy. he can take it. but his whole schtick about women should know their place and not order more than 2 drinks when he says let's go out for a drink, but if she orders an appetizer, that counts as a drink, etc... you got to admit, this is a bit douchey. maybe because i grew up when people actually went on dates on not just "hooked up" i'm a bit old fashioned, but if you ask a girl (woman) out and she tells you she's hungry, what's the big deal about getting a meal, even if you just met for drinks. if you (not you specifically), don't have enough money, just tell her. or ask her to split the check. but don't expect her to be a mindreader and know to eat in advance. maybe i'm old fashioned. stand up when a woman enters the room. hold doors open. ALWAYS pick up the check. etc... what can i say? it's how i was raised.

[TailgateNut]

Originally Posted by WhoIsJohnGalt

ok, so maybe i was being a bit hard on him. he's a big boy. he can take it. but his whole schtick about women should know their place and not order more than 2 drinks when he says let's go out for a drink, but if she orders an appetizer, that counts as a drink, etc... you got to admit, this is a bit douchey. maybe because i grew up when people actually went on dates on not just "hooked up" i'm a bit old fashioned, but if you ask a girl (woman) out and she tells you she's hungry, what's the big deal about getting a meal, even if you just met for drinks. if you (not you specifically), don't have enough money, just tell her. or ask her to split the check. but don't expect her to be a mindreader and know to eat in advance. maybe i'm old fashioned. stand up when a woman enters the room. hold doors open. ALWAYS pick up the check. etc... what can i say? it's how i was raised.

[Jason in LA]

Originally Posted by WhoIsJohnGalt

ok, so maybe i was being a bit hard on him. he's a big boy. he can take it. but his whole schtick about women should know their place and not order more than 2 drinks when he says let's go out for a drink, but if she orders an appetizer, that counts as a drink, etc... you got to admit, this is a bit douchey. maybe because i grew up when people actually went on dates on not just "hooked up" i'm a bit old fashioned, but if you ask a girl (woman) out and she tells you she's hungry, what's the big deal about getting a meal, even if you just met for drinks. if you (not you specifically), don't have enough money, just tell her. or ask her to split the check. but don't expect her to be a mindreader and know to eat in advance. maybe i'm old fashioned. stand up when a woman enters the room. hold doors open. ALWAYS pick up the check. etc... what can i say? it's how i was raised.

I think you're making certain assumptions that aren't really true.

First of all, as a rule, always be a gentleman. That's opening doors, putting your arm out for her, being polite. Nothing that I have said goes against being a gentleman.

You mentioned her paying and having sex on the first date. One rule I go by is if you ask somebody out then you should pay for the whole thing. I typically ask a woman out on a first date, and I always pay for it. And I don't attempt to have sex with a woman on a first date. You kind of filled that one in yourself.

There are various reasons why I don't do dinner on a first date, and it's not because I can't afford it. I don't believe in spending a lot of money on somebody I don't know, and especially on somebody I might not see again. So a couple rounds of drinks is good. The point of saying "lets go out for drinks" and setting the date up later pretty much tells the woman that we're going out for drinks, not dinner. So common sense would say, eat before you show up. I could see your point if when the server came by and she ordered food and I said "Hey, we're just here for drinks, no food!" That would be a douche move. I've never stopped a woman from ordering food or given her a look of disapproval for doing so. I'll just order my second drink and when the server comes back I don't order another drink. Chances are she won't order a drink. If she did I wouldn't stop her, but chances are she won't. So I kept the bill where I wanted it without making any type of awkward or douche type move.

A couple rounds of drinks plus tips, about $50. That's cool for a first date. Seeing that I date often, I'm not doing $100+ dates, unless it is a woman that I have seen multiple times. And if we've gone out that many times, then she's picked up some checks here and there, so it isn't an issue paying that much for a date.

But the first couple dates, keep that simple and don't blow a lot of money while showing her a great time. It just makes sense.

[Chris]

I think there's a difference between chivalry and getting the girl. I consider myself a well mannered chivalrous guy (open doors, stand up when a lady gets up or sits down at the table, never put the wang in the popcorn until the second movie, etc.) but I play a slightly different game when I first start dating someone, especially if I only plan for it to be fun and physical (let's get physical, physical.... anyways).

I don't think there's anything wrong with having a girl pay for her own food and drinks on the first date so long as you're taking the time to entertain, be good in conversation, flirt, etc and your own tab matches hers closely. It really depends on the girl... but I never date princesses that expect everything and if they're hot but boring that's a very different kind of date. It's basically how long before I can get you home and that's a fun challenge in and of itself (I'm upfront when this is the case and it can actually make the girl a lot less nervous and self conscious).

Anyways... this the modern world. Most of us are on a budget. It gets particularly expensive if you're going on dates with several girls at the same time as anyone who gets on a roll knows is often the case. Splitting the bill is fair.

[Gort]

Originally Posted by Jason in LA

I think you're making certain assumptions that aren't really true.

First of all, as a rule, always be a gentleman. That's opening doors, putting your arm out for her, being polite. Nothing that I have said goes against being a gentleman.

You mentioned her paying and having sex on the first date. One rule I go by is if you ask somebody out then you should pay for the whole thing. I typically ask a woman out on a first date, and I always pay for it. And I don't attempt to have sex with a woman on a first date. You kind of filled that one in yourself.

There are various reasons why I don't do dinner on a first date, and it's not because I can't afford it. I don't believe in spending a lot of money on somebody I don't know, and especially on somebody I might not see again. So a couple rounds of drinks is good. The point of saying "lets go out for drinks" and setting the date up later pretty much tells the woman that we're going out for drinks, not dinner. So common sense would say, eat before you show up.

A couple rounds of drinks plus tips, about $50. That's cool for a first date. Seeing that I date often, I'm not doing $100+ dates, unless it is a woman that I have seen multiple times. And if we've gone out that many times, then she's picked up some checks here and there, so it isn't an issue paying that much for a date.

But the first couple dates, keep that simple and don't blow a lot of money while showing her a great time. It just makes sense.

i was being sarcastic. (to the boldfaced part above)

it's not that you are necessarily a douchebag.

but your posting was douchey. it's the rules, both stated and implied, about meeting for drinks, what counts as a drink, how many drinks is too many, how much you should have to spend, etc. that's douchey. and then spending time thinking about such rules... that's douchey. and then posting it online... that's douchey. some things are better left unsaid i guess. i'm sure your motivations are sincere, but it comes off differently when posted for others to read who don't know you.

[Chris]

Here's my motto - do what you have to to get the girl (assuming this doesn't harm anyone in any way) and be a gentleman once you've got her. I got 4 phone numbers the night I met my now girlfriend of two years and I dated one of the other girls briefly before going all monogamushy. It is what it is.

[Crushaholic]

I hate when people go through the express lane of the grocery store with a cart full of groceries. 20 items or less, people! Some of us with 2 or 3 items would like to get out of the store, in the next century. The checkers won't refuse to take them, because it would be bad for business...

[HAT]

Originally Posted by WhoIsJohnGalt

i was being sarcastic. (to the boldfaced part above)

it's not that you are necessarily a douchebag.

but your posting was douchey. it's the rules, both stated and implied, about meeting for drinks, what counts as a drink, how many drinks is too many, how much you should have to spend, etc. that's douchey. and then spending time thinking about such rules... that's douchey. and then posting it online... that's douchey. some things are better left unsaid i guess. i'm sure your motivations are sincere, but it comes off differently when posted for others to read who don't know you.

It'd be douchey if he was talking about all dates....But for FIRST dates a $40-50 budget is fine (Cheaper if you can pull it off). Especially if you date a lot like Jason says he does.

First dates serve one purpose....To see if there's enough chemistry to warrant a 2nd. Why drop $100+ on dinner & booze if you're never going to see someone again?

[HAT]

You gotta love the 'Mane....Couple of pages on topic turns into dragster gay bashing turns into dating philosophies.

[Hogan11]

Originally Posted by HAT

You gotta love the 'Mane....Couple of pages on topic turns into dragster gay bashing turns into dating philosophies.

Same as it ever was

[sirhcyennek81]

Originally Posted by HAT

You gotta love the 'Mane....Couple of pages on topic turns into dragster gay bashing turns into dating philosophies.

Totally. Its a good board. Dont reply to this post though, or people will think we are dating.

[Chris]

Originally Posted by Hogan11

Same as it ever was

How did I get here?

[Hogan11]

Originally Posted by Chris

How did I get here?

Watching the days go by