Fighting Pulmonary Fibrosis with the help of a vast community - The Orange Mane

crazyhorse · 10-01-2009, 05:34 PM

When I 1st learned about IPF and that I had it, my mind just spun. Over the next few weeks I found that when you learn you're terminal, you spend a great deal of time consoling the people you have told. Eeryone wants so badly to say the right thing to you. They want to say smething so profound that it may lighten the sting of knowing you're in trouble. Fact is, there is nothing.

Another thing I learned is your closest friends tend to separate themselves from you a bit. At 1st, I was pissed because I thought, these arent friends. But when you are close to someone, you are effected more and you dont know what to say or do for that friend to help them and you tend to become paralyzed when you visit them. I have experienced it myself.

The lesson that surprized me the most was the amount of people on the fringe of your circle of friends that reach out to you. People like you guys. You guys have done so much more than you think you have. You added a positive dimension to a situation that has so few positives that without you, my fight would have been perhaps too tough to bear. I mean that with every fiber.

The year of my progression, I had all the tough talks with my wife, friends family, and my son. It was a difficult time for us all but I thought that when the time came I was prepared. I thought that everything needing said had been said. All senarios had been discussed. But one that wasn't discussed was the psycological and emotinal side of recovery.

My surgery didn't go well. I recieved a very bad set of lungs that suffered a perfusion injury during transplant. I developed antibodies that immediately began to reject the lungs. I developed CMV which is a cousin to chicken pox from what I understand. Transplantation is traumatic enough to recover from, but when coupled with the other problems it's too much for the body to fight at one time. Not long after that I contracted bronchitis. Needless to say by the time my feet hit the floor I had been laying in the bed for over 2 months and I was so weak that I could barely lift my head off the bed. I didn't have the strength to turn on my side or comb my hair.

I'm not going to go into the laundry list of bad news the doctors kept coming and telling me day after day. But I will yell you that I know what it is to contemplate giving up. As embarassed as I am to say it, I almost gave up. My will is as strong as anyone reading this. But I now know anyone can be broken given enough to carry. There really is a point where you know your life is not worth living. I have been there.

I now have worked my way back to stability in my mind, and enough stability in my body to look forward to my future. I have regained a handle on my life and am pulling my self up on my own now.

I am here today 1st because I could never give up in the face of my wife and son. I am here secondly because of places like this, and people like you saying keep fighting Dan. Your prayers and efforts were not wasted on me and I'm writing this to let you know that.

Though this was my battle, I couldn't have done it alone. I couldn't have done it without the help of a community that owes me nothing. I couldn't have done it without you.

Thank you for lifting me up when I was at my lowest. You dont know what you did. But you are heros in my book.
Dan

Now, if we can just let the lung transplant thred drop off the page, I can start my new life. You know, I read that whole thread today. It really tells the story. You guys are just awsome. It belongs in the ring of fame. Because it reflects so positively on this group of people, and is some of yout finest work to date.

BlaK-Argentina · 10-01-2009, 05:37 PM

You, my friend, are an example for us all.

Great to see you're back.

Sorry the Chiefs still suck.

BlaK-Argentina · 10-01-2009, 05:45 PM

Stay strong man, you'll be working on your car before you know it!

cutthemdown · 10-01-2009, 05:48 PM

This board could really do some great things with a little organization.

I remember them coming together to build a bike for a disabled kid. Send people to see there parents when they can't afford it. Help out a rival fan when things looked bleak for him.

Great news that you are doing well crazy. Go give that wife of yours a big hug, kiss, and start planning the life you thought you weren't gonna have.

Good times baby!!!!!!! We call it life, and it kicks the crap out of being dead!!!!

crazyhorse · 10-01-2009, 05:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cutthemdown

This board could really do some great things with a little organization.

I remember them coming together to build a bike for a disabled kid. Send people to see there parents when they can't afford it. Help out a rival fan when things looked bleak for him.

Great news that you are doing well crazy. Go give that wife of yours a big hug, kiss, and start planning the life you thought you weren't gonna have.

Good times baby!!!!!!! We call it life, and it kicks the crap out of being dead!!!!

Ironically enough, I met Sam. The disabled boy you spoke of. I was inspired and charmed by him at the same time. He was at Childrens hospital for hip surgery while I was there. I also met Falconer and his lovely wife Molly. He married up BTW. Great people. People I could be good friends with.

TDmvp · 10-01-2009, 06:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazyhorse

Ironically enough, I met Sam. The disabled boy you spoke of. I was inspired and charmed by him at the same time. He was at Childrens hospital for hip surgery while I was there. I also met Falconer and his lovely wife Molly. He married up BTW. Great people. People I could be good friends with.

Yea that thread and the help you all gave Sam is what I remember anytime I hate this place during drama ...

When the chips are down most of you guys are money ... I have much respect for a lot of you all even the ones I sometimes clash with who I know in RL are totally great people...
And Crazy you keep fighting man.

Dr. Broncenstein · 10-01-2009, 06:29 PM

Dan,

You are a miraculously tough SOB. I hope you get through this, and get home to a life outside of the hospital. Sounds like you're in great hands in the meantime. Keep fighting and get well.

Doc B

Hogan11 · 10-01-2009, 06:38 PM

Keep on fighting and getting better Craze.....never give up, never let down, no matter what.

Rock Chalk · 10-01-2009, 06:42 PM

Dan, you dirty rotten Chief fan, well done. Even if your taste if football teams is absolute crap, you are a strong, courageous man and I applaud your strength and will and determination to keep fighting when all looked lost and the doc's kept giving you bad news.

It's an old cliche, but its true, whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger and you my friend, are stronger than most.

I removed your thread from the sticky as per your request as well. I am certainly proud of being part of a community that could offer even a strand of hope when there seemed to be none and it makes me proud to be a human being in times like these. Most of us don't know you from Jane, yet our hearts went out to you with compassion and, yes, even love.

Here's to many more football "disagreements" and "debates" good brother. (Now, if you are a Mizzou fan, take everything I said and throw it out the window

)

ZONA · 10-01-2009, 06:46 PM

Don't you ever give up. I know you may want to sometimes but always try to remember there are terminally ill kids out there fighting for their young lives every day and if they can fight, so can you.

Keep on fighting Crazy !!!

Killericon · 10-01-2009, 06:52 PM

You're the man, Crazy.

gunns · 10-01-2009, 06:53 PM

It's so good to hear you feeling better, mentally and physically. I cannot understand what you've been through and I would never think less of you for wanting to give up. Even knowing that I would also never think my prayers were wasted because maybe that's what got you through that. How fortunate that you got to say things to your family we may all regret not saying. I'm thrilled you are here.

Oh, and I'm not sorry the Chiefs still suck.

Meck77 · 10-01-2009, 06:58 PM

Right on Dan. I wish you well.

cutthemdown · 10-01-2009, 07:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TDmvp

Yea that thread and the help you all gave Sam is what I remember anytime I hate this place during drama ...

When the chips are down most of you guys are money ... I have much respect for a lot of you all even the ones I sometimes clash with who I know in RL are totally great people...
And Crazy you keep fighting man.

Anyone who would let politics decide who his good friends are, or who he should help out, is a bigger fool then I.

Some of my closest, dearest friends are very liberal. Some of them very conservative. What they all have in common is they are decent people and great friends.

I would never let politics get in the way of being a decent person, and helping out a fellow American, or another person stuck on this planet with me.

We are all being hurled through the universe together.

OABB · 10-01-2009, 07:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cutthemdown

Anyone who would let politics decide who his good friends are, or who he should help out, is a bigger fool then I.

Some of my closest, dearest friends are very liberal. Some of them very conservative. What they all have in common is they are decent people and great friends.

I would never let politics get in the way of being a decent person, and helping out a fellow American, or another person stuck on this planet with me.

We are all being hurled through the universe together.

unless they voted for W. in 2004 I'm totally with you.

sisterhellfyre · 10-01-2009, 07:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazyhorse

Though this was my battle, I couldn't have done it alone. I couldn't have done it without the help of a community that owes me nothing. I couldn't have done it without you.

Now, if we can just let the lung transplant thred drop off the page, I can start my new life.

Welcome back, Dan. I'm very glad you're still here and still with us, and I'm thankful for the opportunity to have helped you in some way.

Bronx33 · 10-01-2009, 08:15 PM

Glad things have gone well for you dan it could have not been easy so props to you and your family for going through a very tough time ...

but sadly the cheaps still suck.

Rock Chalk · 10-01-2009, 08:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by orangeandblueblooded

unless they voted for W. in 2004 I'm totally with you.

Not only did I vote for W in 2004, but I voted for him in 2000 and voted McCain in 2008 and will vote against the Communist Pig that is running the country right now in 2012.

baja · 10-01-2009, 08:29 PM

OK Look let's not beat around the bush here Crazy you need to cheer on a SB winner and you need to do it soon sso that is why you need to become a Broncos fan. End of Story!

Your letter touched my heart Dan. You are a beautiful man. God Bless!

Los Broncos · 10-01-2009, 08:35 PM

I feel for you man and I really hope things work out in the end.

Bless you and your family.

Sassy · 10-01-2009, 08:48 PM

Keep on fighting Dan!

bronco militia · 10-01-2009, 08:51 PM

your welcome, crazy

how's the mustang?

OABB · 10-01-2009, 09:02 PM

Crazy,

I'm glad you are feeling better, but I won't be happy until you start smacktalking again....

keep feeling better you bastard!

bronco610 · 10-01-2009, 09:02 PM

Keep it up Crazy. Glad to hear you've turned a corner.

From all the posts I read before we knew you were sick I figured you were too ornery to die. Sorry the team you root for is the chiefs. I guess that franchise would make anyone fighting mad.

Natedogg · 10-01-2009, 09:06 PM

We should have done a "Goodbye Lenin-type" charade and made it seem as though the Cheifs weren't the laughing stock of the league.

When I hit dark days, I'll remember your courage dan.

10-01-2009, 05:34 PM	#1
crazyhorse All Motor!! You can only hope to contain me Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 7,338	Fighting Pulmonary Fibrosis with the help of a vast community When I 1st learned about IPF and that I had it, my mind just spun. Over the next few weeks I found that when you learn you're terminal, you spend a great deal of time consoling the people you have told. Eeryone wants so badly to say the right thing to you. They want to say smething so profound that it may lighten the sting of knowing you're in trouble. Fact is, there is nothing. Another thing I learned is your closest friends tend to separate themselves from you a bit. At 1st, I was pissed because I thought, these arent friends. But when you are close to someone, you are effected more and you dont know what to say or do for that friend to help them and you tend to become paralyzed when you visit them. I have experienced it myself. The lesson that surprized me the most was the amount of people on the fringe of your circle of friends that reach out to you. People like you guys. You guys have done so much more than you think you have. You added a positive dimension to a situation that has so few positives that without you, my fight would have been perhaps too tough to bear. I mean that with every fiber. The year of my progression, I had all the tough talks with my wife, friends family, and my son. It was a difficult time for us all but I thought that when the time came I was prepared. I thought that everything needing said had been said. All senarios had been discussed. But one that wasn't discussed was the psycological and emotinal side of recovery. My surgery didn't go well. I recieved a very bad set of lungs that suffered a perfusion injury during transplant. I developed antibodies that immediately began to reject the lungs. I developed CMV which is a cousin to chicken pox from what I understand. Transplantation is traumatic enough to recover from, but when coupled with the other problems it's too much for the body to fight at one time. Not long after that I contracted bronchitis. Needless to say by the time my feet hit the floor I had been laying in the bed for over 2 months and I was so weak that I could barely lift my head off the bed. I didn't have the strength to turn on my side or comb my hair. I'm not going to go into the laundry list of bad news the doctors kept coming and telling me day after day. But I will yell you that I know what it is to contemplate giving up. As embarassed as I am to say it, I almost gave up. My will is as strong as anyone reading this. But I now know anyone can be broken given enough to carry. There really is a point where you know your life is not worth living. I have been there. I now have worked my way back to stability in my mind, and enough stability in my body to look forward to my future. I have regained a handle on my life and am pulling my self up on my own now. I am here today 1st because I could never give up in the face of my wife and son. I am here secondly because of places like this, and people like you saying keep fighting Dan. Your prayers and efforts were not wasted on me and I'm writing this to let you know that. Though this was my battle, I couldn't have done it alone. I couldn't have done it without the help of a community that owes me nothing. I couldn't have done it without you. Thank you for lifting me up when I was at my lowest. You dont know what you did. But you are heros in my book. Dan Now, if we can just let the lung transplant thred drop off the page, I can start my new life. You know, I read that whole thread today. It really tells the story. You guys are just awsome. It belongs in the ring of fame. Because it reflects so positively on this group of people, and is some of yout finest work to date.

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10-01-2009, 05:37 PM	#2
BlaK-Argentina Pampita says... ... support your team! Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Mar del Plata, Argentina. Posts: 5,174 Adopt-a-Bronco: Eddie Royal	You, my friend, are an example for us all. Great to see you're back. Sorry the Chiefs still suck.

10-01-2009, 05:45 PM	#3
BlaK-Argentina Pampita says... ... support your team! Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Mar del Plata, Argentina. Posts: 5,174 Adopt-a-Bronco: Eddie Royal	Stay strong man, you'll be working on your car before you know it!

10-01-2009, 05:48 PM	#4
cutthemdown A verbis ad verbera Zimm to HOF Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Long Beach Posts: 32,531	This board could really do some great things with a little organization. I remember them coming together to build a bike for a disabled kid. Send people to see there parents when they can't afford it. Help out a rival fan when things looked bleak for him. Great news that you are doing well crazy. Go give that wife of yours a big hug, kiss, and start planning the life you thought you weren't gonna have. Good times baby!!!!!!! We call it life, and it kicks the crap out of being dead!!!!

10-01-2009, 06:29 PM	#7
Dr. Broncenstein Overdriven Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Sterile Fields Posts: 11,622 Adopt-a-Bronco: Wesley Woodyard	Dan, You are a miraculously tough SOB. I hope you get through this, and get home to a life outside of the hospital. Sounds like you're in great hands in the meantime. Keep fighting and get well. Doc B

10-01-2009, 06:38 PM	#8
Hogan11 Rock-N-Roll Historian Let's take these SOB's out!!!!!! Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: W.NY.B.C. Posts: 21,300 Adopt-a-Bronco: Floyd Little	Keep on fighting and getting better Craze.....never give up, never let down, no matter what.

10-01-2009, 06:42 PM	#9
Rock Chalk Cheeky Bastards Laus Deo Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: The Backside of the Internet Posts: 29,940 Adopt-a-Bronco: Chris Harris	Dan, you dirty rotten Chief fan, well done. Even if your taste if football teams is absolute crap, you are a strong, courageous man and I applaud your strength and will and determination to keep fighting when all looked lost and the doc's kept giving you bad news. It's an old cliche, but its true, whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger and you my friend, are stronger than most. I removed your thread from the sticky as per your request as well. I am certainly proud of being part of a community that could offer even a strand of hope when there seemed to be none and it makes me proud to be a human being in times like these. Most of us don't know you from Jane, yet our hearts went out to you with compassion and, yes, even love. Here's to many more football "disagreements" and "debates" good brother. (Now, if you are a Mizzou fan, take everything I said and throw it out the window )

10-01-2009, 06:46 PM	#10
ZONA Ring of Famer Liquid greatness in every packet Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Phoenix, AZ Posts: 7,407 Adopt-a-Bronco: Chris Harris	Don't you ever give up. I know you may want to sometimes but always try to remember there are terminally ill kids out there fighting for their young lives every day and if they can fight, so can you. Keep on fighting Crazy !!!

10-01-2009, 06:52 PM	#11
Killericon YES A DT!!!!!! Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: From Calgary, in Halifax for School Posts: 7,730 Adopt-a-Bronco: watermock	You're the man, Crazy.

10-01-2009, 06:53 PM	#12
gunns I WANT DEFENSE! Defense, defense, defense Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Always Hoping Posts: 11,661 Adopt-a-Bronco: Defense	It's so good to hear you feeling better, mentally and physically. I cannot understand what you've been through and I would never think less of you for wanting to give up. Even knowing that I would also never think my prayers were wasted because maybe that's what got you through that. How fortunate that you got to say things to your family we may all regret not saying. I'm thrilled you are here. Oh, and I'm not sorry the Chiefs still suck.

10-01-2009, 06:58 PM	#13
Meck77 Ring of Famer Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 16,312	Right on Dan. I wish you well.

10-01-2009, 08:15 PM	#17
Bronx33 lets go partner Rumpson Rocks Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Lakewood,Colo Posts: 41,221 Adopt-a-Bronco: Woodyard	Glad things have gone well for you dan it could have not been easy so props to you and your family for going through a very tough time ... but sadly the cheaps still suck.

10-01-2009, 08:29 PM	#19
baja It is what it Is. Pay attention. Join Date: Apr 2001 Posts: 53,928 Adopt-a-Bronco: Buy My Book	OK Look let's not beat around the bush here Crazy you need to cheer on a SB winner and you need to do it soon sso that is why you need to become a Broncos fan. End of Story! Your letter touched my heart Dan. You are a beautiful man. God Bless!

10-01-2009, 08:35 PM	#20
Los Broncos Ring of farmers Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Anaheim Hills, Santa Ana Mountains CA Posts: 18,766 Adopt-a-Bronco: Ryan Clady	I feel for you man and I really hope things work out in the end. Bless you and your family.

10-01-2009, 08:48 PM	#21
Sassy Ring of Famer Join Date: May 2001 Location: ND Posts: 37,952 Adopt-a-Bronco: Eddie Royal	Keep on fighting Dan!

10-01-2009, 08:51 PM	#22
bronco militia Ring of Famer THE GREATEST Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: colorado springs, co Posts: 22,591	your welcome, crazy how's the mustang?

10-01-2009, 09:02 PM	#23
OABB Master of Karate aaahaaaaaaaaah Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Los angeles Posts: 7,132 Adopt-a-Bronco: tgnsmyb****	Crazy, I'm glad you are feeling better, but I won't be happy until you start smacktalking again.... keep feeling better you bastard!

10-01-2009, 09:02 PM	#24
bronco610 OLD FART Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Keller, TX Posts: 2,025 Adopt-a-Bronco: Woodyard	Keep it up Crazy. Glad to hear you've turned a corner. From all the posts I read before we knew you were sick I figured you were too ornery to die. Sorry the team you root for is the chiefs. I guess that franchise would make anyone fighting mad.

10-01-2009, 09:06 PM	#25
Natedogg 1st Amendment Protection You sending The MethWolfe!!!??? Join Date: May 2005 Location: St. Petersburg Russia Posts: 1,880 Adopt-a-Bronco: Travis Henry	We should have done a "Goodbye Lenin-type" charade and made it seem as though the Cheifs weren't the laughing stock of the league. When I hit dark days, I'll remember your courage dan.