Old Butch - A "Political Rooster" - The Orange Mane

L.A. BRONCOS FAN · 11-22-2007, 03:39 AM

The farmer kept records, and any rooster that didn't perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of his time, so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so John could tell from a distance which rooster was performing.

Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply
by listening to the bells.

The farmer's favorite rooster was "old Butch," and a very fine specimen
he was, too.

But on this particular morning John noticed old Butch's bell hadn't
rung at all! John went to investigate.

The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The
pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover.

But to Farmer John's amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so
it couldn't ring. He would sneak up on a pullet, do his job, and walk
on to the next one.

John was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the County Fair and
Butch became an overnight sensation among the judges.

The result...the judges not only awarded old Butch the "No Bell Piece
Prize" but they also awarded him the "Pullet-surprise" as well.

Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making: Who else but a
politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted
awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace
and screwing them when they weren't paying attention?

baja · 11-22-2007, 07:32 AM

L O L

L.A. BRONCOS FAN · 11-22-2007, 08:59 AM

Two Alligators

Two alligators were relaxing in the swamp talking.
The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said,
"I can't understand how you kin be so much bigger 'n me.
We're the same age, and we was the same size as kids.
I just don't get it."

"Well," said the big 'gator, "What you been eatin', boy?"
"Politicians, same as you," replied the small 'gator.
"Hmm. Well, where do y'all catch 'em?"
"Down ' tother side of the swamp
near the parkin' lot by the capitol."
"Same here. Hmm. How do you catch 'em?"
"Well, I crawls up into one of them Lexus
and wait fer one to open the car door.
Then I jump out, grab 'em on the leg,
shake the sh*t out of 'em, and eat 'em!"

"Ah!" says the big alligator,
"I think I see your problem.
You ain't gettin' any real nourishment."
"See, by the time you get done shakin'
the sh*t out of a Politician,
there ain't nothin' left but
an a$$hole and a briefcase!"

11-22-2007, 03:39 AM	#1
L.A. BRONCOS FAN Mo' holla fo' yo' dolla! Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: In a bunker in an undisclosed location Posts: 52,697	Old Butch - A "Political Rooster" The farmer kept records, and any rooster that didn't perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of his time, so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so John could tell from a distance which rooster was performing. Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply by listening to the bells. The farmer's favorite rooster was "old Butch," and a very fine specimen he was, too. But on this particular morning John noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all! John went to investigate. The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover. But to Farmer John's amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He would sneak up on a pullet, do his job, and walk on to the next one. John was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the County Fair and Butch became an overnight sensation among the judges. The result...the judges not only awarded old Butch the "No Bell Piece Prize" but they also awarded him the "Pullet-surprise" as well. Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making: Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention?

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11-22-2007, 07:32 AM	#2
baja It is what it Is. Pay attention. Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: in a bunker Posts: 54,381 Adopt-a-Bronco: Julius Thomas	L O L

11-22-2007, 08:59 AM	#3
L.A. BRONCOS FAN Mo' holla fo' yo' dolla! Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: In a bunker in an undisclosed location Posts: 52,697	Two Alligators Two alligators were relaxing in the swamp talking. The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, "I can't understand how you kin be so much bigger 'n me. We're the same age, and we was the same size as kids. I just don't get it." "Well," said the big 'gator, "What you been eatin', boy?" "Politicians, same as you," replied the small 'gator. "Hmm. Well, where do y'all catch 'em?" "Down ' tother side of the swamp near the parkin' lot by the capitol." "Same here. Hmm. How do you catch 'em?" "Well, I crawls up into one of them Lexus and wait fer one to open the car door. Then I jump out, grab 'em on the leg, shake the sht out of 'em, and eat 'em!" "Ah!" says the big alligator, "I think I see your problem. You ain't gettin' any real nourishment." "See, by the time you get done shakin' the sht out of a Politician, there ain't nothin' left but an a$$hole and a briefcase!"