|10-23-2007, 02:41 AM||#1|
Join Date: Apr 2006
Don't cut the Mustard
Mustard unknown, unbeaten
By Woody Paige
The Denver Post
He's been cut more than Chuck Wepner.
Chad Mustard is the Broncos' Bleeder.
He's spent more Sundays on the sofa this season watching football than Homer Simpson.
Chad Mustard is a Broncos legend in his spare time.
He has spent more time in the unemployment line than he has on the offense line.
Chad Mustard has been recycled more often than a plastic bottle.
This guy's become the most beloved Mustard since spicy brown and the Colonel in the drawing room with the lead pipe.
Chad Mustard is the Broncos' lucky charm and their Yo-Yo Man.
There are three unbeatens in the National Football League - the New England Patriots, the Indianapolis Colts and Chad Mustard.
The Broncos are 3-3. Chad Mustard is 3-0.
More Mustard, please.
Chad Mustard was in the Broncos' true-blue uniform Sunday night. The Broncos won, of course. He plays and
Broncos win. He stays home and Broncos lose.
Think what you might, but this is some kind of voodoo stuff.
Mustard is not really a tight end-offensive tackle-bench warmer, but he plays one on TV. He's actually more of a basketball player.
Don't go looking for Mustard's name mentioned prominently in the statistics of the Broncos-Steelers game. You won't find him under pass receptions, pancake blocks, special-teams tackles, even under "miscellaneous."
Mustard is the Invisible Bronco.
There are no quotes here from Mustard. I don't know what he looks like. He must have a locker out back of the stadium in the parking lot - Port-A-Locker. I asked a couple of Broncos where I could find Mustard. One replied: "At the hot dog stand. Why you asking me?" Another said: "Who?"
The only proof that Mustard played is in the substitutions list of the box score: "85 C. Mustard." Prove it. A Broncos official said: "We do think he played."
He might not have kicked the winning field goal on the final play, come up with a big catch on the final drive or have a featured play in the final stats.
But in the year of murkiness for the Broncos, Chad Mustard is a ray of shining light.
Mustard was a tight end when he joined the Broncos last season, and the first two games he started - at Pittsburgh and at Oakland - the Broncos won.
This year in training camp, the Broncos tried Mustard at offensive tackle.
Then they cut him Sept. 1, and he was out of the labor force. On Sept. 8, just before the Broncos' first game at Buffalo, Mustard - not a hot commodity for other NFL teams - was re-signed. The Broncos beat the Bills on a last-second field goal.
But the Broncos didn't get it. They cut Mustard on Sept. 11. They apparently regretted their mistake and brought him back Sept. 15. The Broncos beat Oakland in overtime on a field goal.
There's a trend.
The Broncos released Mustard on Sept. 17. Stop the presses. He wasn't re-signed that week. The Broncos lost to Jacksonville. He wasn't signed again the next week, and the Broncos lost to Indianapolis. He wasn't signed the next week, and the Broncos were blown out by San Diego.
Mustard thought he had a tryout with another team, but it was a wrong number.
He sort of hung out and waited for opportunity ... at FedEx Player or the new Nordstrom's.
Then, lo and behold, Mustard was signed again Thursday when Stephen Alexander went on injured reserve.
The Broncos won their third game last night. Hot Mustard!
Before anyone believes Mike Shanahan is cruel and heartless for jerking Mustard back and forth, you have to understand that he's been released before.
Mustard was waived four times, and placed on injured reserve once, over three years by the Cleveland Browns and was cut by Carolina in 2005 before the Broncos started signing and cutting him.
But, being cut by an NFL team might be preferable to playing for the Rhein Fire in Europe and the unforgettable Omaha Beef - I'm not lying - in the National Indoor Football League.
Of course, Mustard played in the Peace Garden State at the University of North Dakota.
The 6-foot-6, 277-pounder was a star ... on the basketball team. As a senior, he led the Fighting Sioux to the NCAA Division II postseason tournament. He was voted third-team All-American. When his basketball eligibility ran out, Mustard turned to football. His team went to the Division II playoffs.
Yet, Mustard wasn't drafted by the NBA or the NFL or even the NIFL.
Maybe, just maybe, Mustard will remain on the Broncos' roster for the rest of the season. They will have a chance to be good and win every game in the last few seconds.
Don't cut the Mustard.
|10-23-2007, 02:43 AM||#2|
Join Date: Nov 2002
Proof Paige reads the Mane? I could've sworn someone else raised all these points on here at the time the team resigned him.
|10-23-2007, 02:43 AM||#3|
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Los Angeles, CA
I wonder if he gets any sort of up-front money with each re-signing? There has to be some sort of guarantee, even if small. It could be adding up by now!