Are you a Repub a Dem or maybe a Redneck - The Orange Mane

Hotrod · 08-17-2006, 11:20 AM

Got this in an Email and think its pretty accurate way of telling where you stand. Turns out Im a Redneck.....who would of thunk it

Are You a Democrat, Republican, or Redneck?

The answer can be found by
posing the following question:

You're walking down
a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly,
an
Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks
eyes with
you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and
charges at
you. You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot.
You have
mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What
do you do?

Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out
of his
hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message
does this
send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he
was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this
happier,
healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends
for few
days and try to come to a consensus.

Republican's Answer:

BANG!

Redneck's
Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click....

(sounds of reloading.)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click...

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or
Hollow Points?"

Son: "Dad, If there's more than one, can I shoot the next one?"

Wife: "You ain't taking that to the
Taxidermist!!"

NodJello · 08-17-2006, 11:41 AM

Funny stuff

Rohirrim · 08-17-2006, 11:51 AM

This is complete and utter BS. I can't believe you would post such crap. Another attack on the poor Dems. Can't you give it a rest? Besides, a Dem wouldn't go through all that crap before shooting the terrorist and defending his family...

although he might ask the terrorist if he's registered to vote first.

Hotrod · 08-17-2006, 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rohirrim

This is complete and utter BS. I can't believe you would post such crap. Another attack on the poor Dems. Can't you give it a rest? Besides, a Dem wouldn't go through all that crap before shooting the terrorist and defending his family...

although he might ask the terrorist if he's registered to vote first.

SteveTensi13 · 08-17-2006, 11:54 AM

Oh my God that was funny stuff! True, but funny nonetheless!!

defenseman · 08-17-2006, 11:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hotrod

Got this in an Email and think its pretty accurate way of telling where you stand. Turns out Im a Redneck.....who would of thunk it

Are You a Democrat, Republican, or Redneck?

The answer can be found by
posing the following question:

You're walking down
a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly,
an
Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks
eyes with
you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and
charges at
you. You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot.
You have
mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What
do you do?

Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out
of his
hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message
does this
send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he
was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this
happier,
healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends
for few
days and try to come to a consensus.

Republican's Answer:

BANG!

Redneck's
Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click....

(sounds of reloading.)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click...

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or
Hollow Points?"

Son: "Dad, If there's more than one, can I shoot the next one?"

Wife: "You ain't taking that to the
Taxidermist!!"

I'm loving this!!!!

Spot on, hotrod. Spot f%$king on!!!!Very good example of the democratic "method" of resolving conflict, DEBATE and don't make a decision. ..dman

TailgateNut · 08-17-2006, 11:55 AM

I'm a dem but I say F*&^ the Glock. Take the knife and slice him from his horizontal smile to his vertical smile and then wipe the blood on the back of a republican three piece suit to cover the natural yellow streak!

SteveTensi13 · 08-17-2006, 11:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rohirrim

This is complete and utter BS. I can't believe you would post such crap. Another attack on the poor Dems. Can't you give it a rest? Besides, a Dem wouldn't go through all that crap before shooting the terrorist and defending his family...

although he might ask the terrorist if he's registered to vote first.

Umm, the point is a democrat wouldn't shoot!

Hotrod · 08-17-2006, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TailgateNut

I'm a dem but I say F*&^ the Glock. Take the knife and slice him from his horizontal smile to his vertical smile and then wipe the blood on the back of a republican three piece suit to cover the natural yellow streak!

With thoughts like that I just wanted to let you know there is still room for you on the good side

defenseman · 08-17-2006, 12:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rohirrim

This is complete and utter BS. I can't believe you would post such crap. Another attack on the poor Dems. Can't you give it a rest? Besides, a Dem wouldn't go through all that crap before shooting the terrorist and defending his family...

although he might ask the terrorist if he's registered to vote first.

C'mon the dems post anti-bush, anti-repub, anti-conservative , on and on , ALL THE TIME. Nothing wrong having a little fun going the other way. Quite funny and maybe a bit closer to the truth than some folks would be willing to admit..dman...Care to DEBATE IT

?

bendog · 08-17-2006, 01:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by defenseman

C'mon the dems post anti-bush, anti-repub, anti-conservative , on and on , ALL THE TIME. Nothing wrong having a little fun going the other way. Quite funny and maybe a bit closer to the truth than some folks would be willing to admit..dman...Care to DEBATE IT

?

come on, read the last sentence.

Sort of reminds me of:

You're standing waiting for the elevator door to open. It opens and there stand Saddam, Osama, and your wife's divorce lawyer. You are carrying a revolver, but it has only two bullets. Who do you shoot?

The lawyer, twice.

Blueflame · 08-17-2006, 01:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SteveTensi13

Umm, the point is a democrat wouldn't shoot!

No, the point... and the flaw with the "joke" is that a Democrat would shoot... and probably just as quickly as a Republican or a Redneck would in the situation described (in which their personal safety and the safety of their family was threatened).

Rigs11 · 08-17-2006, 01:32 PM

the repub would call in an airstrike and level the whole neigborhood and then blame the media

RaiderH8r · 08-17-2006, 01:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blueflame

No, the point... and the flaw with the "joke" is that a Democrat would shoot... and probably just as quickly as a Republican or a Redneck would in the situation described (in which their personal safety and the safety of their family was threatened).

A Democrat would WISH he could shoot, but then would recall guns being banned and the second amendment being abolished thanks to him and those like him.

bendog · 08-17-2006, 01:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rigs11

the repub would call in an airstrike and level the whole neigborhood and then blame the media

They'd also bomb the wrong neighborhood.

Though I think there are some gopers who understand dubya is a clusterkj;jjk;, and Iraq was really, really stupid.

TailgateNut · 08-17-2006, 01:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RaiderH8r

A Democrat would WISH he could shoot, but then would recall guns being banned and the second amendment being abolished thanks to him and those like him.

Betcha there are more democrats with a gun than Republicans with a spine!

defenseman · 08-17-2006, 01:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bendog

come on, read the last sentence.

Sort of reminds me of:

You're standing waiting for the elevator door to open. It opens and there stand Saddam, Osama, and your wife's divorce lawyer. You are carrying a revolver, but it has only two bullets. Who do you shoot?

The lawyer, twice.

Hell yeah, I'm good with that

..dman

RaiderH8r · 08-17-2006, 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TailgateNut

Betcha there are more democrats with a gun than Republicans with a spine!

Is this when we're supposed to whip'em out to see who's is bigger or does that come later?

Blueflame · 08-17-2006, 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RaiderH8r

A Democrat would WISH he could shoot, but then would recall guns being banned and the second amendment being abolished thanks to him and those like him.

But didn't the "scenario" specify that the hypothetical person was an expert marksman and that the gun was at hand? Of course, the "expert marksman" part would eliminate Cheney, wouldn't it?

Hotrod · 08-17-2006, 01:51 PM

Um pretty sure it was a joke

This is a perfect example of why nothing gets done in our nations capital or this forum....

elsid13 · 08-17-2006, 01:53 PM

Well that funny but the real answer are

Democrats - Have the UN solve the problem, complaining that NRA is allowing the bad guys to buy gun in the first place
Republican - Outsource the operation to China, then complain that it the Democratic fault becaue they are soft on crime/national defense
Redneck - Wonder why pawned his gun to pay for his cheap beer, then turn the attack into Country Western Song after his wife beats the guy to death with his brother-in-laws' tire iron

RaiderH8r · 08-17-2006, 01:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hotrod

Um pretty sure it was a joke

This is a perfect example of why nothing gets done in our nations capital or this forum....

Yeah, Democrat holding a gun is a dead giveaway that a punchline is coming.

Spider · 08-17-2006, 02:00 PM

spot on huh ........ those that met me in Person , I ask , if a terrorist came up to me even without my family being there , what do you guys think i would do ?

Spider · 08-17-2006, 02:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elsid13

Well that funny but the real answer are

Democrats - Have the UN solve the problem, complaining that NRA is allowing the bad guys to buy gun in the first place
Republican - Outsource the operation to China, then complain that it the Democratic fault becaue they are soft on crime/national defense
Redneck - Wonder why pawned his gun to pay for his cheap beer, then turn the attack into Country Western Song after his wife beats the guy to death with his brother-in-laws' tire iron

Hotrod · 08-17-2006, 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elsid13

Well that funny but the real answer are

Democrats - Have the UN solve the problem, complaining that NRA is allowing the bad guys to buy gun in the first place
Republican - Outsource the operation to China, then complain that it the Democratic fault becaue they are soft on crime/national defense
Redneck - Wonder why pawned his gun to pay for his cheap beer, then turn the attack into Country Western Song after his wife beats the guy to death with his brother-in-laws' tire iron

Um no a real Redneck would never pawn his gun/truck or dog the wife ehhh maybe

08-17-2006, 11:20 AM	#1
Hotrod Self Appointed Expert aka Dortoh Join Date: Aug 2003 Posts: 25,136 Adopt-a-Bronco: Miss I	Are you a Repub a Dem or maybe a Redneck Got this in an Email and think its pretty accurate way of telling where you stand. Turns out Im a Redneck.....who would of thunk it Are You a Democrat, Republican, or Redneck? The answer can be found by posing the following question: You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do? Democrat's Answer: Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior. This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus. Republican's Answer: BANG! Redneck's Answer: BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.... (sounds of reloading.) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click... Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?" Son: "Dad, If there's more than one, can I shoot the next one?" Wife: "You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!!"

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

08-17-2006, 11:41 AM	#2
NodJello Rookie Noob poster, old fan Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: CO Posts: 53 Adopt-a-Bronco: Cecil Sapp	Funny stuff

08-17-2006, 11:51 AM	#3
Rohirrim Partisan Human Cannonball Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Twixt Hell & Highwater Posts: 48,830	This is complete and utter BS. I can't believe you would post such crap. Another attack on the poor Dems. Can't you give it a rest? Besides, a Dem wouldn't go through all that crap before shooting the terrorist and defending his family... although he might ask the terrorist if he's registered to vote first.

08-17-2006, 11:54 AM	#5
SteveTensi13 GIVE ME SOME MORE ORANGE OLD SCHOOL BRONCO Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Helmand province, Afghanistan Posts: 1,830 Adopt-a-Bronco: Brandon Stokley	Oh my God that was funny stuff! True, but funny nonetheless!!

08-17-2006, 11:55 AM	#7
TailgateNut Bleedin' orange! .......as much as tebonites Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Mile High Posts: 20,018 Adopt-a-Bronco: Howard Griffith	I'm a dem but I say F*&^ the Glock. Take the knife and slice him from his horizontal smile to his vertical smile and then wipe the blood on the back of a republican three piece suit to cover the natural yellow streak!

08-17-2006, 01:32 PM	#13
Rigs11 Ring of Famer Join Date: Dec 2002 Posts: 7,820	the repub would call in an airstrike and level the whole neigborhood and then blame the media

08-17-2006, 01:51 PM	#20
Hotrod Self Appointed Expert aka Dortoh Join Date: Aug 2003 Posts: 25,136 Adopt-a-Bronco: Miss I	Um pretty sure it was a joke This is a perfect example of why nothing gets done in our nations capital or this forum....

08-17-2006, 01:53 PM	#21
elsid13 Lost In Space Bóg, Honor, Ojczyzna Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: DC Posts: 19,081	Well that funny but the real answer are Democrats - Have the UN solve the problem, complaining that NRA is allowing the bad guys to buy gun in the first place Republican - Outsource the operation to China, then complain that it the Democratic fault becaue they are soft on crime/national defense Redneck - Wonder why pawned his gun to pay for his cheap beer, then turn the attack into Country Western Song after his wife beats the guy to death with his brother-in-laws' tire iron

08-17-2006, 02:00 PM	#23
Spider Mr Diplomacy I survived Tebow Mania at the Mane Join Date: May 2001 Location: Elway was just an arm =MacGruder Posts: 84,438 Adopt-a-Bronco: Von Miller	spot on huh ........ those that met me in Person , I ask , if a terrorist came up to me even without my family being there , what do you guys think i would do ?