Favorite Movie Quotes

[Mr]

"I love the smell of napalm in the morning" Robert Duvall - Apocalypse Now - 1979

[BizzyBone7]

wasnt this in the general discussion once before...glad u brought it back, it was one of my favorite threads and it was gone off the first page one day and i didnt bother bringing it back. anyways....

"We got no food, we got no jobs, our PETS HEADS ARE FALLING OFF!" Dumb and Dumber

ill pick one from saving silverman a hilarious movie...

"Hey Remember me JD McNougan...I was the guy who who went to the prom with a tuxedo paitned on my naked body then accidentally spilt a glass of punch on myself and every1 could see my DONG. Oh yeah! We had chemistry together and I tried to light a fart with the Bunsen burner and I ended up singeing my balls... still can't grow hair on my left nut. Sucks."

[Dr. Broncenstein]

DOMINO, MUTHA***A!! --- Ice Cube - boys in the hood

[football idiot]

'Craig, what were you doing stealing boxes. You trying to build a club house?"
Tucker, from Friday.

'Give ME the keys, you F#$%ing C#$%@#er!" Usual Suspects-many

'The police have themselves an RV' Die-Hard.

[TheManeMan]

Originally Posted by football idiot

'Give ME the keys, you F#$%ing C#$%@#er!" Usual Suspects-many

Cop: Number 1, step forward.
Hockney: 'Hand me the keys, you ****ing **********.'

Cop: Number 2, step forward.
McManus: 'Give me the ****ing keys, you ****ing co******in' mother****er,' aaarrrghh!

Cop: Knock it off! Get back! Number 3, step forward.
Fenster: [Laughing.] 'Hand me the keys, you **********!'

Cop: In English, please?
Fenster: Excuse me?

Cop: In English.
Fenster: 'Hand me the ****ing keys, you **********,' what the ****?

[L.A. BRONCOS FAN]

"I've decided I'm going to stick around for awhile.

I've also decided that if you don't like it then that's your tough sh*t."

--Steven Seagal, "Fire Down Below"

[Dr. Broncenstein]

Peter: "This isn't bad... working for a living, outside, catchin some rays.."

Lawrence: "Fu-kin eh man..."

Peter: (inspires deeply -- stands proud) "Fu-kin eh..."

--- the end of Office Space ---

[L.A. BRONCOS FAN]

[Mr]

"All that I know is that when I get to the turnstyle I have to give the man two dollars or he wont let me inside... but when I get there some patron shoves me and I think to myself... Whats happening here?" - Johnny Depp - Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas

[Mr]

"I wasnt looking at his neck man" - Tommy Chong - Up In Smoke

[Rigs11]

From Monty Python and the Holy Grail:

BEDEMIR: What makes you think she is a witch?
VILLAGER #3: Well, she turned me into a newt.
BEDEMIR: A newt?
VILLAGER #3: I got better.

[Rigs11]

From Monty Python and the Holy Grail:

BEDEMIR: What makes you think she is a witch?
VILLAGER #3: Well, she turned me into a newt.
BEDEMIR: A newt?
VILLAGER #3: I got better.

[The Dark Knight]

Walter Sobchak: OVER THE LINE!
Smokey: Huh?
Walter Sobchak: I'm sorry, Smokey. You were over the line that's a foul.
Smokey: Bull****. Mark it 8, Dude.
Walter Sobchak: Uh, excuse me. Mark it zero. Next frame.
Smokey: Bull****, Walter. Mark it 8, Dude.
Walter Sobchak: Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules.
The Dude: Walter, ya know, its Smokey, so his foot slipped over the line a little, big deal.
Walter Sobchak: Dude, this is a league game, the winner of this gets to progress into the next round robin. Am I wrong? Am I wrong?
Smokey: Yeah but I wasn't over.
Walter Sobchak: [pulls out a gun] Smokey you are about to enter a world of pain.
Smokey: Yeah but...
Walter Sobchak: [shouting] A world of pain.
Smokey: Dude, could you...
The Dude: Jesus Walter, you bring a ****ing gun bowling?
Walter Sobchak: [shouting] Has the whole world gone crazy? Am I the only one who pays attention to the rules any more?
Smokey: Yeah but...
Walter Sobchak: [shouting] You think i'm ****ing around? I'm not ****ing around!
[points gun in Smokey's face]
Walter Sobchak: Mark it zero! ****ing mark it zero.
The Dude: They're calling the cops, man.
Smokey: Alright, its ****ing zero. Are you happy now you crazy ****?
Walter Sobchak: ...Its a league game Smokey...

[RaiderH8r]

Tim: the Enchanter:Follow, but follow only if ye be men of valor! For the entrance to this cave is guarded by a creature so fowl, so cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived. Bones of four fifty men lie strewn about its lair! So, brave knights, if you do doubt your courage, or your strength, come nay further, for death awaits you all . . . with nasty big pointy teeth!


King Arthur: How does it... um... how does it work?
Lancelot: I know not, my liege.
King Arthur: Consult the Book of Armaments!
Brother Maynard: Armaments, chapter two, verses nine through twenty-one.
Cleric: [reading] And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the Lord did grin. And the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths, and carp and anchovies, and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit-bats and large chu--
Brother Maynard: Skip a bit, Brother...
Cleric: And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it."
Brother Maynard: Amen.
All: Amen.
King Arthur: Right. One... two... five!
Galahad: Three, sir.
King Arthur: Three!

[Jenson71]

From Pulp Fiction:

Jimmy: "I'm not a cob of corn, so you can stop buttering me up. I don't need you to tell me how ****ing good my coffee is, all right? I'm the one who buys it. I know how good it is. When Bonnie goes out shopping she buys ****. Me, I buy the expensive gourmet stuff because when I drink it I like to taste it. But you know what's on my mind right now? It AIN'T the coffee in my kitchen, it's the dead ****er in my garage."

Vincent: "We should have ****in' shotguns."

Jules: "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee."

Mia: "That's when you know you've found somebody special. When you can just shut the **** up for a minute and comfortably enjoy the silence."

Captain Koons: "The way your dad looked at it, this watch was your birthright. He'd be damned if any of the slopes were gonna get their greasy yellow hands on his boy's birthright. So he hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable piece of metal up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you."

[Jenson71]

From Jackie Brown

Ordell: "That ****'ll rob you of your ambitions"
Melanie: "Not if your ambition is to get high and watch TV."


From Kill Bill: Vol. 1:

The Bride: "It was not my intention to do this in front of you. For that I'm sorry. But you can take my word for it, your mother had it comin'. When you grow up, if you still feel raw about it, I'll be waiting."

Hattori Hanzo: "I can tell you with no ego that this is my finest blade. If, on your journey, you should encounter God... God will be cut."

O-Ren Ishii: "You didn't think it was gonna be that easy, did you?"
The Bride: "You know, for a second there, yeah, I kinda did."

Budd: "That woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die."

O-Ren Ishii: "As your leader, I encourage you from time to time, and always in a respectful manner, to question my logic. If you're unconvinced that a particular plan of action I've decided is the wisest, tell me so, but allow me to convince you and I promise you right here and now, no subject will ever be taboo. Except, of course, the subject that was just under discussion. The price you pay for bringing up either my Chinese or American heritage as a negative is - I collect your ****ing head. Just like this ****er here. Now, if any of you sons of b****es got anything else to say, now's the ****ing time. I didn't think so."

The Bride: "It's mercy, compassion, and forgiveness I lack; not rationality."

Bill: "Y'all beat the hell out of that woman, but you didn't kill her. And I put a bullet in her head, but her heart just kept on beatin'. Now, you saw that yourself with your own beautiful blue eye, did you not? We've done a lot of things to this lady. And if she ever wakes up, we'll do a whole lot more. But one thing we won't do is sneak into her room in the night like a filthy rat and kill her in her sleep. And the reason we won't do that thing is because... that thing would lower us. Don't you agree, Miss Driver?"

Bill: "One more thing, Sofie... is she aware her daughter is still alive?"

[Jenson71]

From Kill Bill: Vol. 2:

Bill: "Pai Mei taught you the five point palm-exploding heart technique?"

Bill: "You're not a bad person. You're a terrific person. You're my favorite person. But every once in a while you just can be a real ****."

Bill: "I guess I overreacted."

Bill: "I'm a killer. A murdering bastard, you know that. And there are consequences to breaking the heart of a murdering bastard."

Bill: "He hates Caucasians, despises Americans, and has nothing but contempt for women... so in your case, it might take a while."

Pai Mei: "Just like all Yankee women, all you are good at is ordering in restaraunts- and spending a man's money!"

[RaiderH8r]

Carl Spackler: This crowd has gone deadly silent, a Cinderella story outta nowhere. Former greenskeeper and now about to become the masters champion.

Ty Webb: A flute without holes, is not a flute. A donut without a hole, is a danish.

Spalding: This is good stuff. I got it from a Negro. You're probably high already and you don't even know it.

[twotimes3233]

From the worst movie ever.
"Showgirls"
The Robert Davi character lays this one on Elizabeth Berkley the lead in this turd.

"It must be nice having a job where guys don't cum on your back"

[fuzzy]

"love is nothing more than a messy conglomeration of need, desperation, fear of death and insecurity about penis size." - Human nature.

[SimonFletcher73]

"Sherlock Holmes did coke, and he wasn't so stupid was he?" Tommy Chong in Nice Dreams

[fontaine]

From Goodfellas when Joe Pesci shoots the kid from the poker table:

Ray Liotta: "Yo Tommy you gonna let this punk get away with that?"

From Silence of the Lambs, at the end when Hannibal the Cannibal is speaking to Clareese with an eye on Dr. Chilton getting off the plane.

Hannibal: "I do wish we could chat longer, but I'm having an old friend for dinner."

From The Blues Brothers, self explanatory:

"They're not gonna catch us! We're on a mission from God."

From Scarface, Al Pacino welcoming his visitors with a little high caliber, rapid fire action:

Al Pacino: "Say hello to my little friend!"