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Old 08-07-2013, 09:30 AM   #1
peacepipe
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Default NFL team relocations?

http://www.sbnation.com/nfl/2013/8/7...aguars-raiders
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Cleveland Browns -> North Korea. The regime's history of media fabrications means we are the closet we will ever be to a "BROWNS WIN SUPER BOWL" headline.

Denver Broncos -> Kazakhstan. Region where some of the first horses were domesticated by man; also have no existing Papa John's franchises in-country.


Green Bay Packers -> Israel. That first Lambeau Leap over the Wailing Wall will be part of the Sunday Night Football montage for years to come.
Fun read.
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Old 08-07-2013, 12:16 PM   #2
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Meh.

Only funny one was

New England Patriots -> Romania. Special request by Bill Belichick, who wants to spend more time with his 800-year-old family avoiding the sunlight and feeding on townsfolk.
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Old 08-07-2013, 12:22 PM   #3
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Oakland Raiders -> Somalia. "Bloodthirsty, lawless and remorseless." These were the terms the Somali pirates used to describe Oakland's fanbase, but we have assured them this behavior can be toned down.

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Old 08-07-2013, 01:47 PM   #4
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New York Jets -> Italy. The Italians love leaders who are brash, stout and sexually deviant, so Prime Minister Rex Ryan is a real possibility. Economics desk also determined that Mark Sanchez's skill set fits country's traditional industry, Men Standing Around In Suits With Nice Hair, perfectly.


^^This description could be a Monty Python skit...
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