|01-20-2012, 01:49 AM||#1|
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Twixt Hell & Highwater
And Now For Something Completely Different...
An interview with my favorite writer of all time, Kurt Vonnegut. Since it has something to do with war, and religion, and politics, I thought it would fit here. I've excerpted Vonnegut's description of how he learned to fire a howitzer, for a start. And so it goes:
Not really. We would put the shell in there, and then we would throw in bags of very slow and patient explosives. They were damp dog biscuits, I think. We would close the breech, and then trip a hammer which hit a fulminate of mercury percussion cap, which spit fire at the damp dog biscuits. The main idea, I think, was to generate steam. After a while, we could hear these cooking sounds. It was a lot like cooking a turkey. In utter safety, I think, we could have opened the breechblock from time to time, and basted the shell. Eventually, though, the howitzer always got restless. And finally it would heave back on its recoil mechanism, and it would have to expectorate the shell. The shell would come floating out like the Goodyear blimp. If we had had a stepladder, we could have painted “**** Hitler” on the shell as it left the gun. Helicopters could have taken after it and shot it down.