John Wayne & Elvis had 40-60 pounds of fecal matter in them when they died - The Orange Mane

ZONA · 06-20-2007, 11:01 AM

Atopsy reports, according to the show I watched last night, said John Wayne had 40+ pounds of fecal matter in his colon when he died. Elvis has 60+ pounds of fecal matter. That their colons had been stretched from the normal 2.5 inches in diameter to 6 inches but the passage way was still less then 1 inch. That means the walls of the colon are caked with $hit from years and years. Man, can this be true? Does the colon actually hold on to your crap for that long and let it build up like that?

Is it just me or does that sound extreme? The show went on, a doctor and healthfood store owner along with other leading medical experts say that millions of americans have so much fecal matter stuck up in us that it's one of the leading reasons why we get sick so much. They say fecal matter (crap basically) is stuck to the lining of our colon and is trapped there and that it hosts parasites, bacteria and likewise. They say you should have 2 to 3 bowel movements a day. The colon absorbs nutrients and water and when that tries to pass through the cake walls of $hit, it gets bacteria in it and stuff and then puts that back in our bodies, thus we have problems.

Anywone every have their colon cleaned or did it themselves? Just curious if indeed the average american under 40 years old has this much built up fecal matter stored in them. Sounds gross but when you did your cleaning, what did you see?

Beantown Bronco · 06-20-2007, 11:06 AM

Oh well....I WAS enjoying my "hungry-size" bag of peanut butter M&Ms.

Sean · 06-20-2007, 11:07 AM

This sure beats the **** out of a Hixon thread.

bronco militia · 06-20-2007, 11:08 AM

hmmmmmm....this seems like a baja thread

Hotrod · 06-20-2007, 11:09 AM

This has potential written all over it.

55CrushEm · 06-20-2007, 11:10 AM

I wouldn't worry.....just eat a bowl of Kellogg's All Bran every day (get the buds, it looks like rabbit food).....

One-third of a cup has 51% of your RDA of fiber !!! I eat 1/2 cup in the morning, and 1/2 cup in the afternoon......I'm all set.

Spider · 06-20-2007, 11:12 AM

you are full of shít ....... Literally

orange 4 life · 06-20-2007, 11:19 AM

this is the stuff that scares me, since all the meds ive had to take for my back are constipating.
ive already had my intestines start to shut down, and while we got 'em going again, its still more like a bowel movement every 3 days instead of 3 a day.

hopefully getting off the meds (im decreasing them now) will fix the problem.

footstepsfrom#27 · 06-20-2007, 11:20 AM

Think what Kris Jenkins is hangin' onto.

bendog · 06-20-2007, 11:22 AM

Yeah a baja thread. On that note, when I have my colonoscopy later this year, I have to drink this evil **** for three days to clean me out. Will this work the same as one of baja's colonics or colonblow or will I still have all the colon placque?

fontaine · 06-20-2007, 11:28 AM

Quote:

Anywone every have their colon cleaned or did it themselves?

Hold on there partner.

For the uneducated like myself, how in the world would you even begin to administer a self colonic?

azbroncfan · 06-20-2007, 11:28 AM

Well when you quit ****T!NG it is a sign you are dying and basically poisoning yourself. I don't doubt it.

TheDave · 06-20-2007, 11:30 AM

Not true....

http://www.snopes.com/horrors/gruesome/fecalcolon.asp

fuzzy · 06-20-2007, 11:30 AM

ZachKC · 06-20-2007, 11:31 AM

Not a good read to give your day a jumpstart.

orangeatheist · 06-20-2007, 11:35 AM

I guess this is the silver lining to having IBS.

bendog · 06-20-2007, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fontaine

Hold on there partner.

For the uneducated like myself, how in the world would you even begin to administer a self colonic?

There are two schools of thought on this matter. One involves a jar of vaseline and a garden hose with the metal end removed (unless you're a chef's fan and like it "rough") or colonblow.

http://www.colonblow.com/

ZONA · 06-20-2007, 11:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by footstepsfrom#27

Think what Kris Jenkins is hangin' onto.

OMG - I just had a nasty vision. A doctor doing a colon check on Jenkins and Sam Adams and Big Daddy all on the same day. Throw away the shovel, time to rent the bobcat.

ZONA · 06-20-2007, 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bendog

There are two schools of thought on this matter. One involves a jar of vaseline and a garden hose with the metal end removed (unless you're a chef's fan and like it "rough") or colonblow.

http://www.colonblow.com/

Oh nasty - they showed that on the show last night. One lady said she had to pull the black cord from her anus and this is what came out. She asked the doctor if it was normal and he said it was common. Seeing that makes you want to detox or get clean or whatever. Having that inside you? Makes me want to puke.

bendog · 06-20-2007, 11:46 AM

I like doing colonblow at work cause it leaves the men's room soooo nasty.

fontaine · 06-20-2007, 11:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bendog

I like doing colonblow at work cause it leaves the men's room soooo nasty.

bronclvr · 06-20-2007, 12:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ZONA

OMG - I just had a nasty vision. A doctor doing a colon check on Jenkins and Sam Adams and Big Daddy all on the same day. Throw away the shovel, time to rent the bobcat.

I just spit Coffee all over myself with that one-too funny!

DomCasual · 06-20-2007, 12:16 PM

Was the show you were watching, by chance, an infomercial?

Los Broncos · 06-20-2007, 12:36 PM

I take a pill every once and a while to avoid this.

Los Broncos · 06-20-2007, 12:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bendog

I like doing colonblow at work cause it leaves the men's room soooo nasty.

I like bombing a burger king or subway bathroom once in a while.

06-20-2007, 11:01 AM	#1
ZONA Ring of Famer Liquid greatness in every packet Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Phoenix, AZ Posts: 7,363 Adopt-a-Bronco: Chris Harris	John Wayne & Elvis had 40-60 pounds of fecal matter in them when they died Atopsy reports, according to the show I watched last night, said John Wayne had 40+ pounds of fecal matter in his colon when he died. Elvis has 60+ pounds of fecal matter. That their colons had been stretched from the normal 2.5 inches in diameter to 6 inches but the passage way was still less then 1 inch. That means the walls of the colon are caked with $hit from years and years. Man, can this be true? Does the colon actually hold on to your crap for that long and let it build up like that? Is it just me or does that sound extreme? The show went on, a doctor and healthfood store owner along with other leading medical experts say that millions of americans have so much fecal matter stuck up in us that it's one of the leading reasons why we get sick so much. They say fecal matter (crap basically) is stuck to the lining of our colon and is trapped there and that it hosts parasites, bacteria and likewise. They say you should have 2 to 3 bowel movements a day. The colon absorbs nutrients and water and when that tries to pass through the cake walls of $hit, it gets bacteria in it and stuff and then puts that back in our bodies, thus we have problems. Anywone every have their colon cleaned or did it themselves? Just curious if indeed the average american under 40 years old has this much built up fecal matter stored in them. Sounds gross but when you did your cleaning, what did you see?

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06-20-2007, 11:06 AM	#2
Beantown Bronco Athletic Supporter Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Mass Posts: 19,040 Adopt-a-Bronco: Matt Prater	Oh well....I WAS enjoying my "hungry-size" bag of peanut butter M&Ms.

06-20-2007, 11:07 AM	#3
Sean Won't worry my life away Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Boca Raton, FL Posts: 548	This sure beats the **** out of a Hixon thread.

06-20-2007, 11:08 AM	#4
bronco militia Ring of Famer THE GREATEST Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: colorado springs, co Posts: 22,568	hmmmmmm....this seems like a baja thread

06-20-2007, 11:09 AM	#5
Hotrod Self Appointed Expert aka Dortoh Join Date: Aug 2003 Posts: 25,136 Adopt-a-Bronco: Miss I	This has potential written all over it.

06-20-2007, 11:10 AM	#6
55CrushEm Wolverine or Superman? Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: North of Boston, MA Posts: 5,590 Adopt-a-Bronco: "Squid"Quan	I wouldn't worry.....just eat a bowl of Kellogg's All Bran every day (get the buds, it looks like rabbit food)..... One-third of a cup has 51% of your RDA of fiber !!! I eat 1/2 cup in the morning, and 1/2 cup in the afternoon......I'm all set.

06-20-2007, 11:12 AM	#7
Spider Mr Diplomacy I survived Tebow Mania at the Mane Join Date: May 2001 Location: Elway was just an arm =MacGruder Posts: 84,438 Adopt-a-Bronco: Von Miller	you are full of shít ....... Literally

06-20-2007, 11:19 AM	#8
orange 4 life Old School Orange Home team qb homer Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Anywhere, CO. Posts: 8,642	this is the stuff that scares me, since all the meds ive had to take for my back are constipating. ive already had my intestines start to shut down, and while we got 'em going again, its still more like a bowel movement every 3 days instead of 3 a day. hopefully getting off the meds (im decreasing them now) will fix the problem.

06-20-2007, 11:20 AM	#9
footstepsfrom#27 helmet to helmet hitter Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Arlington, TX Posts: 16,117 Adopt-a-Bronco: Joe Mays	Think what Kris Jenkins is hangin' onto.

06-20-2007, 11:22 AM	#10
bendog Marginally Continent David Bowens, he'd be an upgrade Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Folsom Prison Posts: 19,935 Adopt-a-Bronco: David Bowens	Yeah a baja thread. On that note, when I have my colonoscopy later this year, I have to drink this evil **** for three days to clean me out. Will this work the same as one of baja's colonics or colonblow or will I still have all the colon placque?

06-20-2007, 11:28 AM	#12
azbroncfan Ring of Famer Angry guntoting,meateating AMERICAN Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Scottsdale Posts: 8,669 Adopt-a-Bronco: TEBOW	Well when you quit ****T!NG it is a sign you are dying and basically poisoning yourself. I don't doubt it.

06-20-2007, 11:30 AM	#14
fuzzy Pro Bowler Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 668

06-20-2007, 11:30 AM	#13
TheDave Sauced... Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 15,120	Not true.... http://www.snopes.com/horrors/gruesome/fecalcolon.asp

06-20-2007, 11:31 AM	#15
ZachKC For The Glory Of The City Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Kansas City Posts: 9,665 Adopt-a-Bronco: Eddie Kennison	Not a good read to give your day a jumpstart.

06-20-2007, 11:35 AM	#16
orangeatheist Champion of the Godless Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 3,012	I guess this is the silver lining to having IBS.

06-20-2007, 11:46 AM	#20
bendog Marginally Continent David Bowens, he'd be an upgrade Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Folsom Prison Posts: 19,935 Adopt-a-Bronco: David Bowens	I like doing colonblow at work cause it leaves the men's room soooo nasty.

06-20-2007, 12:16 PM	#23
DomCasual The Dude abides. Shameless Homer Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Cocytus Posts: 13,167 Adopt-a-Bronco: Gus Frerotte	Was the show you were watching, by chance, an infomercial?

06-20-2007, 12:36 PM	#24
Los Broncos Ring of farmers Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Anaheim Hills, Santa Ana Mountains CA Posts: 18,766 Adopt-a-Bronco: Ryan Clady	I take a pill every once and a while to avoid this.