Office practical jokes

[Sean]

Anybody like to play practical jokes on your office co-workers?

This is one of my favorites ...

Wait til your unsuspecting co-worker leaves his/her office/cubicle and then change the sound of their incoming mail notification. Ever seen Eurotrip? When the kid in the movie gets an email it sounds like Mr T saying "Mail Mutherf#cker!" Well, I found a .wav file of that sound bite online ... and when my buddy left his desk to go take a smoke break I put the file on his computer and set his mail notification to the "Mail Mutherf#cker" .wav file and turned his speakers way up. When he came back in from his smoke break we all emailed him ... hilarity ensued.

Granted, I'm easily amused. The possibilities are endless with this simple ruse though.

Anybody have some good office practical jokes to share?

[DB-Freak]

The simplest one is probably turn the speaker sound all the way up while they're not there.

People fall for that way too often.

[No1BroncoFan]

Set the office fax machine to infinite re-dial and send their voice line a fax.

Put Carmex (or any other soft lip care product) on the earpiece of their phone and give them a jingle.

Ben

[Sean]

Originally Posted by No1BroncoFan

Set the office fax machine to infinite re-dial and send their voice line a fax.

Put Carmex (or any other soft lip care product) on the earpiece of their phone and give them a jingle.

Ben

The Carmex one would piss me off. Probably be funny though.

[PatsWin2002]

We used to work with an annoying Napoleon-like character (read as "short man's syndrome"). We were friendly with him, but tolerated him more than anything else (he was a Director).

One time we put a few large textbooks under the legs of his desk and lowered his chair all the way down. Then we'd left a 7oz beer can on his desk with a straw in it. He'd come in and sit down and look like a 4 year old.

Another time we stole one of the rolling castors from his chair - that was amusing.

I've even taken people's corporate pictures off the company intranet and put them on dating websites in other parts of the country. Then I send the link to a few co-workers and we have a good laugh about it. Who could've known that one of our VP's wanted to hang with 18 year olds in the Dallas area and have a funky baby oil adventure?!

And then there's the time my friend from work (a woman in her 50's) left her license at work by mistake. She called to make sure we'd hang onto it for her. I scanned it and photoshopped it to make her 65 (changed the address too). Then I took it to a bakery that can put the image on a sheet cake. The next day I threw her a phony retirement party in my department. She's such a good sport. Everybody kept saying, "I didn't know you were that old!" To which she replied, "I'm not! That a$$hole made me 65!"

I crack myself up.

[eddie mac]

Originally Posted by PatsWin2002

And then there's the time my friend from work (a woman in her 50's) left her license at work by mistake. She called to make sure we'd hang onto it for her. I scanned it and photoshopped it to make her 65 (changed the address too). Then I took it to a bakery that can put the image on a sheet cake. The next day I threw her a phony retirement party in my department. She's such a good sport. Everybody kept saying, "I didn't know you were that old!" To which she replied, "I'm not! That a$$hole made me 65!"

I crack myself up.

Bit like the time a female colleague had her 30th birthday, the date falls around the same time as Wimbledon over here (tennis) and a certain publication always has topless models holding rackets etc. So I used a photo and put her head on the model's body put it on a huge banner with the title 30 love!! Other fella's around the office have never looked at her the same since.

[Garcia Bronco]

Originally Posted by eddie mac

Bit like the time a female colleague had her 30th birthday, the date falls around the same time as Wimbledon over here (tennis) and a certain publication always has topless models holding rackets etc. So I used a photo and put her head on the model's body put it on a huge banner with the title 30 love!! Other fella's around the office have never looked at her the same since.

I'd so get fired for doing that here in the States.

[eddie mac]

Originally Posted by Garcia Bronco

I'd so get fired for doing that here in the States.

I would too now but it was a good 10 years ago Garcia.

One we do with all new receptionists. Give them the number of the local zoo (think you's guys call them that as well) and get them to ask to speak to a C Lyons. That's a cracker, bit like Porky's and has anyone seen Mike Hunt.

[Billy Clyde Puckett]

We took a bunch of those Army/Marines recruiting reply post cards out of magazines and put a co-worker's name and phone number on them. He got tens of calls and could never figure out why.

[Sean]

PatsWin, damn man. You take it to another level. That's some funny ****. Showing your co-workers links of the VP in dating services is ballsy ... and funny as hell. I'm laughing at the thought of the short guy too.

[Moon§hiner]

Years ago my boss had screwed up floppies by storing them near a magnetic letter holder...so I couldn't resist...a few weeks later it was her birthday and I went in the night before and wrote a little batch file to run before windows started saying "warning, Windows has detected a magnetic device too near your computer and will format the hard drive now...press escape to cancel"...then had it pause and said "formatting now, thank you for choosing Microsoft"...then had the batch file play "Happy Birthday to You"....she did everything but pull the plug and was very red faced...priceless

[Liebs]

Take a screen print of your coworkers screen when it is "locked" I.E. when a password and name is needed to log back in. Use this as a wallpaper and hide the icons on the desktop. He/she will sit there typing away. Can be funny depending on who it's done to.

[Broncoman13]

I'm a little bit of a prankster myself!!! Usually just small things, like a co-workers lunch in the microwave. For some reason people think they can just put their food in the Nuke Oven and leave for a couple minutes. Here is where it gets really fun. I normally choose to stop their food from cooking..... they come back and either realize it right away and add more time (and then leave again, usually ends up taking them 10-15 minutes to cook a hotpocket!!!!!) Or they take their food without realizing it and end up wondering why their food is still frozen! Every once in a while, if it's somebody that I'm pretty good friends with and I don't mind buying them lunch, I'll add about 5 minutes to their meal. That usually leaves everything hard as a rock or so damn hot they can't eat it for half an hour! Fun times!!! Did this today as a matter of fact! Did the bosses coffee or hot coco or whatever it was a few weeks back and caused the whole thing to blow up in the microwave.... he didn't understand why it did that. I was laughing my ass off in the next room while he cleaned up the microwave..... then I started feeling guilty.......... and scared........ so I helped clean it up.

Another one that I use every once in awhile is the random pink puppy belliing. We have some incredibly hot hot sauce in our workcenter. Daves Insanity and Spontaneous Combustion are two of the more popular brands. If any of you have ever tried them you know how hot they are! We're talking the hottest shiat you've ever tried hot! Anyhow, the random part comes in the form of smearing it over the mouth of a can of soda in the fridge. You never know who is going to buy it or when, but you damn sure know when they do!

It's also fun to offer up the hot sauce to people that aren't familiar with it. They try to use it like tobasco or something. I've seen people throw away their entire meal b/c of a couple drops of that shiat. Funny stuff! I like it, but seriously, you can only eat that stuff in small moderation.......... very small!

I could go on and on. We've taken bailing wire and tied up everything at a persons desk. Their chair tied to their desk. The desk drawers wire together so they don't open independantly! Even lockers so that they don't open until you reach in and cut that wire! Speaking of lockers...... damn don't get me started. Funny story, I'll tell in a minute.


One last one though b/c it's really easy. Take a pocket knife to your buddy's soda can right after he opens it. Put the whole right below the mouth opening...... next time he takes a drink he'll wear it! You business suit types may not want to try this one! Once you do it often enough you graduate to having to make two or three holes.... DECOYS!!!!

[Sean]

We're talking the hottest shiat you've ever tried hot! Anyhow, the random part comes in the form of smearing it over the mouth of a can of soda in the fridge. You never know who is going to buy it or when, but you damn sure know when they do!


Bronco Man, this is straight up evil. L-O-fuggin-L. You and PatsWin are insane.

Moonshiner, that's an innocent enough prank, I think I'll add that to the repertoire. I know just who to target.

Liebs, that's an oldie bit a goodie.

Good times.

[sisterhellfyre]

The president of the company I work for came up with one a while back that I helped him execute. Our fax machine sits on a cabinet in the bookkeeper's office, and I made up this sign to put on the cabinet:

"With recent technology upgrades, our fax machine is now voice-activated. To use the fax, state your name, the word "dial", and the phone number in a loud, clear voice."

I took the an old PC microphone from my parts stash and set it beside the fax machine, with the cord running back behind the machine. It wasn't hooked up to anything, but it looked good.

One of my coworkers came in, read the sign, and proceeded to spend the next five minutes trying to "voice-activate" the fax. Each time, her voice got a little louder. The rest of us just about exploded from trying to keep straight faces... until we simply couldn't stand it any more and all cracked up.

Regards,
m.

[Crush Girl]

Originally Posted by sisterhellfyre

The president of the company I work for came up with one a while back that I helped him execute. Our fax machine sits on a cabinet in the bookkeeper's office, and I made up this sign to put on the cabinet:

"With recent technology upgrades, our fax machine is now voice-activated. To use the fax, state your name, the word "dial", and the phone number in a loud, clear voice."

I took the an old PC microphone from my parts stash and set it beside the fax machine, with the cord running back behind the machine. It wasn't hooked up to anything, but it looked good.

One of my coworkers came in, read the sign, and proceeded to spend the next five minutes trying to "voice-activate" the fax. Each time, her voice got a little louder. The rest of us just about exploded from trying to keep straight faces... until we simply couldn't stand it any more and all cracked up.

Regards,
m.

, that is too funny! I don't see how any of you could have kept a straight face!

I'm a really bad practical joker because I usually start giggling or something and give myself away, but I did get one of my co-workers a few weeks ago.

I work for a dinner theatre and we are constantly showing people seating charts with available tables. They are dry-erase type charts so we can circle available seats and re-use them. I wrote "I have sex for money" in huge black lettering on the top of the chart so when he flipped it over to show the customer that was the first thing they'd see. Luckily (as to not offend our customers and probably lose my job), he noticed it before they did, but he was laughing so hard he couldn't even help them. They probably wondered what the hell was going on, but it was good times!

[Sean]

Originally Posted by Crush Girl

, that is too funny! I don't see how any of you could have kept a straight face!

I'm a really bad practical joker because I usually start giggling or something and give myself away, but I did get one of my co-workers a few weeks ago.

I work for a dinner theatre and we are constantly showing people seating charts with available tables. They are dry-erase type charts so we can circle available seats and re-use them. I wrote "I have sex for money" in huge black lettering on the top of the chart so when he flipped it over to show the customer that was the first thing they'd see. Luckily (as to not offend our customers and probably lose my job), he noticed it before they did, but he was laughing so hard he couldn't even help them. They probably wondered what the hell was going on, but it was good times!

Well the best pranks in my opinion are the ones that end up with everyone laughing real hard and noone really pissed. Sounds like fun.

Work on your poker face! Can't give it away.

[Tom A Hawk]

Originally Posted by sisterhellfyre

The president of the company I work for came up with one a while back that I helped him execute. Our fax machine sits on a cabinet in the bookkeeper's office, and I made up this sign to put on the cabinet:

"With recent technology upgrades, our fax machine is now voice-activated. To use the fax, state your name, the word "dial", and the phone number in a loud, clear voice."

I took the an old PC microphone from my parts stash and set it beside the fax machine, with the cord running back behind the machine. It wasn't hooked up to anything, but it looked good.

One of my coworkers came in, read the sign, and proceeded to spend the next five minutes trying to "voice-activate" the fax. Each time, her voice got a little louder. The rest of us just about exploded from trying to keep straight faces... until we simply couldn't stand it any more and all cracked up.

Regards,
m.

[watermock]

Originally Posted by sisterhellfyre

The president of the company I work for came up with one a while back that I helped him execute. Our fax machine sits on a cabinet in the bookkeeper's office, and I made up this sign to put on the cabinet:

"With recent technology upgrades, our fax machine is now voice-activated. To use the fax, state your name, the word "dial", and the phone number in a loud, clear voice."

I took the an old PC microphone from my parts stash and set it beside the fax machine, with the cord running back behind the machine. It wasn't hooked up to anything, but it looked good.

One of my coworkers came in, read the sign, and proceeded to spend the next five minutes trying to "voice-activate" the fax. Each time, her voice got a little louder. The rest of us just about exploded from trying to keep straight faces... until we simply couldn't stand it any more and all cracked up.

Regards,
m.

That reminds me of the "Save the Whales" Star Trek where Scotty tried talking into the mouse.

[Broncoman13]

That is a good one...... will work on that Monday!!!

[Sean]

That does sound funny, let us know if you try it Bronco Man!

[dbfan4life]

Use scotch tape to tape the handset of the phone to the rest of the phone. Wait for a call and then laugh your ass off when the whole unit goes crashing to the floor. Or, use the same roll of scotch tape to tape everything to their desk. The more the funnier!

[coachmastermind]

Here are some good ones, some lameones...:

Feeling bored in the office?

Looking for something new and exciting to do? Why not initiate an office dare system - however to do it properly only you are allowed to know the dare. Sound confusing? Well read on...

ONE-POINT OFFICE DARES
1) Run one lap around the office at top speed.
2) Groan out loud in the toilet cubicle (at least one other 'non-player' must be in the toilet at the time).
3) Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.
4) Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say, "Just called to say I can't talk right now. Bye."
5) To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace.
6) When someone hands you a piece of paper, finger it, and whisper huskily, "Mmmmmmm, that feels soooooo good!"
7) Walk sideways to the photocopier.
8) While riding an elevator, gasp dramatically every time the doors open.

THREE-POINTS DARES
1) Say to your bosses boss (or the highest person you have access to), "I like your style" and shoot him with double-barreled fingers.
2) Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask, "Did you get all that, I don't want to have to repeat it".
3) Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your voice).
4) Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle (there must be a 'non-player' within sight).
5) Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

FIVE POINT DARES
1) At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).
2) Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.
3) For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as "Bob".
4) Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do a number two".
5) Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now".
6) While an office mate is out, move their chair into the elevator.
7) In a colleague's diary, write in 10am: "See how I look in tights".
8) Carry your keyboard over to your colleague and ask, "You wanna trade?"
9) Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say, "I can't talk about it".
10) Find the vacuum and start vacuuming around your desk.
11) Posing as a maitre d', call a colleague and tell him he's won a lunch for four at a local restaurant. Let him go.
12) Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc) during a very important conference call.
13) Hang a two-foot long piece of toilet roll from the back of your pants and act genuinely surprised when someone points it out.
14) Present meeting attendees with a cup of coffee and biscuit, smash each biscuit with your fist.
15) During the course of a meeting, slowly edge your chair towards the door.
16) Arrange toy figures on the table to represent each meeting attendee, move them according to the movements of their real-life counterparts.

And if that wasn't enough for you...

1) At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
3) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
4) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
5) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over his or her caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
7) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
8) Don't use any punctuation
9) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
11) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
12) Sing along at the opera.
13) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
14) Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.
15) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
16) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won! 3rd time this week!!!"
17) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, "Run for your lives, they're loose!"
18) Choose the most irritating person in a meeting & repeat every word they say in a high pitched voice whilst opening & closing the fingers of your right hand as if operating a glove puppet.

[Sean]

Time to bump this ...

Today a practical joke was played on one of my co-workers. I wasn't behind it, a little too risque for the workplace in my opinion, but I have to admit the way it went down was funny as hell.

It turns out someone went to an online prank site and had a plain brown box package delivered to our office here. It was addressed to my friend, and was labeled as such ...

ANAL INTRUDER

8 inch slim device to probe the region no one will enter.

Now, there was no dilrod in this box, it was empty, just had the labels as mentioned.

The funny part is, the box was received and signed for by the head of HR here. Then the HR guy takes it to the VP of the company. Then the VP gives it to my friend's supervisor, who then in turn gives it to my friend. So by the time it got to my friend it had already made news.

Sheeesh, I'm still laughing. You should have seen how pissed he was. He has no idea who could have done it. I'm just glad noone took it too seriously and he still has his job ... so far.

[PatsWin2002]

I like this thread. It gets the voices in my head talking.