[Meck77]

Sounds like you need to become more flexible and be able to take a chance with another career. When you say you can't find another job I read that as I have too many bills to do what I really want to do. Only you know what that is. I'd sit down with wife and break all your finances down and find out where your money is going and come up with a plan to reduce debt. If you can start slashing debt and maybe build up a small nest egg you can tell your boss to go jump in a lake down the road.

This leads to step 2. Do what you love and the money will follow. You'll be much happier doing something you enjoy.

I have some experience with personal business coaching from back in the day and worked for a guy that really had his head screwed on straight who helped a lot of people make more money and have more time off. This can be done but a real fundamental change in what I've seen and experienced takes about 3 years. It can be done sooner IMO.

Anyhow we'd break it down to 4 parts.

Money, Wealth, Life, Self...All equally important that need to be balanced.

1) Pretty self explanatory-The cash you need to survive
2) This is your overall financial plan. Your assets. This is really where the money comes from in a balanced financial plan/portfolio. The money is just a tool to build wealth.
3) Life-This is your family, friends etc
4) Self- This is where a lot of people we worked with had a real hard time balancing. It's easy to lose yourself chasing money or working hard for the family. You have to balance it all out and make time for yourself. If you don't the rest of it doesn't have a chance.

Anyhow all this stuff takes work and a plan. Do you do any short, middle, long term planning? I'd recommend starting with a weekly plan if not. Work your way up to the monthly and start setting some 6-12 month goals of what you want your life to be like.

I'd immediately start with what I call "closing boxes". This is 3 things that you need to eliminate right off the bat so you can start working towards your goals. It can be something so simple as dealing with a issue with the kids that has been going on for sometime now, it may be you need to take care of some bills that have been on your back, or it may be a relationship with someone that is not worth the energy anymore and you may need to cut them off. Again these are just some examples of things that could immediately change your short term ability to plan.

As you keep getting closer to your goals keep closing those boxes. You'll find that you have more time on your hands to focus on what you need to do.

I don't have all the answers and these techniques are written 100 different ways in just about any self help success book but they do work.

Break out a piece a paper put the date on the top and start making a plan. Once you have some short term goals in place stick them on your mirror in your bathroom. Each morning when you brush your teeth read them out loud. Sounds weird but hearing yourself say them makes them more real.

There is a good book I'd recommend to you. I can't recall the author but it's called "Feel the fear and do it anyway". Great book.


It's a constant challenge balancing those 4 aspects of life I broke down earlier but once you can identify those 4 parts and find some balance with them life gets much easier and more fun.

Just so you know I've been in desperate dead end job situation myself so I'm speaking from experience. I know it feels hopeless. The good thing is it's not! You can get out of this hole storm. The only one keeping you down right now is you even though it may not feel that way. You may think that other people are part of the problem. That may be the case but remember this little saying "It's up to you to teach people how to treat you".

Good luck