Originally Posted by freak6
Did you know that Iraqi men are homosexual, and that it is totally normal, "women are for babies, men are for pleasure"
This was posted in the WARRP Room as part of another topic, but it reminded me of one of the best practical jokes EVER. There's a pretty long backstory, but it's worth it:
My buddy and I, I'll call him Jack cause that's his name, shared a big house in Playa del Rey with an older, appx 55-57 y.o. Cuban guy in 2001-02. This guy, I'll call him 'Ariel' cause that's HIS name, was a revolution refugee as a teen, and still had a thick Cuban accent. He was a fidgety, nervous fussbudget little guy, quite prone to drama. Hilarious really - always fretting over something. He took Ambien to sleep, and - all those stories about sleep-walking and memory loss on Ambien last year? We were WAY ahead of the curve on that one! Ariel would leave half-eaten TV dinners on the table with the microwave door open in the middle of the night, and not remember having done it. Once the mess stayed there a whole day until he finally accused Jack of it, and told him to clean it up! We figured out pretty quick that the Ambien was causing his sleep-eating and memory dropouts. I'm not sure he ever believed us after we ganged up on him and forced him to clean it up. He remained skeptical about our combined insistence he was doing these things.
Then one night when I was gone, he comes into the living room like a zombie and MAKES A PASS AT JACK! Now, Ariel had been married twice and always seemed to genuinely appreciate female beauty, so it came as a big shock to Jack and to me when he told me. So, we confronted Ariel about it, nicely, the next day ... and after we piece together a strong case including the sleep-eating, he finally gave in and admitted that in Cuba, men are very often gay - like freak6 said above.
So, after all this drama we had lived with, the sleep-eating, the messes, the accusations, and the sexual pass, Jack and I decided we had to get some kind of revenge.
We had eaten together occassionally - sometimes all three of us - at the Boston Market restaurant (Sepulveda just south of Manchester, 8 blocks north of LAX for the L.A. people), and we had noticed the manager there was our neighbor 2 doors down. Marty was a nice guy, and we became friends with him, Jack and I did anyway. We hung out and watched football (even though he was a Chargers fan ). Shortly after we met him, Marty had given Jack and I something free at the restaurant - not a whole meal, but a couple little things ... and Ariel felt slighted. He began to be afraid of Marty, and fret to us, "Marty doesn't like me! He never gives me free food!" Marty would tell us Ariel would come in and act really strange - "your friend comes into the restaurant and he just stands there like he was waiting for something." Anyway, Ariel started honestly disliking and actually becoming comically afraid of Marty (who was a bodybuilder which didn't help matters for little Ariel). It got so bad, that the little fussbudget would look out the window and watch for him to come home ..."There he is! There he is!" And when Marty came over, Ariel would peek through the window when he knocked and loudly whispe, "IT'S HIM! IT'S HIM!" as he ran into his room or out the backdoor to sneak off or drive away (he was a real drama-queen about it ).
This is long I know, but bear with me:
One warm night shortly thereafter, when we knew Ariel had been without his Ambien for a few days before finally filling a new prescription - ensuring an especially deep sleep with no eating spells. We kept him up til after midnight to further ensure deep sleep. Then we crashed, but awoke at 6 a.m. and sprang into action. We gently picked up Ariel in his blankets and carried him outside and two doors down and gently laid him into the bed of Marty's Ford pickup truck (one of the smaller trucks, I think Ranger) and put some blankets over him. Ariel was out like a LIGHT! TOTALLY out!
Then, we get into Jack's car across the street and wait for Marty to go to work - we knew he arrived at work at 7 am. Finally Marty comes out, and he doesn't see Ariel! He starts up the truck and DRIVES AWAY! It was about two or three miles to work, and we followed them laughing SO HARD we could barely breathe... finally Ariels' stupid little head pops up and he looks around !! Marty sees him in the mirror and stops the truck as he's pulling into the big parking lot! He leaves the engine on and door open and starts talking to Ariel - I WAS LAUGHING HARDER THAN I HAD EVER LAUGHED IN MY ENTIRE LIFE! Ariel shakes the sleep out of his head, and crawls/stumbles backward in the truck bed as Marty casually extends his hand to help him get out!!! We're sucking for air as we can't even breathe .... Ariel falls outta the bed, and crawls away - then stumbles and ROLLS AWAY from Marty. Marty watches him stumble away for a second, then gets back in the truck and drives the last 100 feet, and parks for work.
Ariel goes stumbling across the Ralphs parking lot for a couple hundred feet in his pajamas, until we finally pull up beside him. THE POOR BASTARD WAS SOBBING!!
I can barely type I'm lkaughing so hard....