Rules to live by
Here it is gang. im certain we all have silly little rules that we live by, i for one have a bunch of them, and in my everlasting quest for knowledge and wisdom, id like to hear yours. alot of these rules are someone elses that i ve adopted.
1- offer a man a beer, if he turns it down without good reason, he aint worth a damn in my book(this one has been revised)
2- good friends and good neighbors are few and far between, theres nothing i wont do for them
3- if you own a framing hammer, its a matter of time before you blast your thumb and likely break it.
4- concrete cracks. its just what it does.
5- no matter how beautiful she is or cool she seems, theres some poor bastard somewhere thats sick of her ****.
6- theres nothing in the world that a good asswhipping or good nights sleep wont fix
7- marriage is a beautiful thing, until you actually do it.
8- someone driving while talking on the phone automatically forfeits all due courtesies.
9- if it isnt working, hit it harder, it likely needs to be fixed anyways.
10- borrowing is for the weak
11- a woman decides inside of 5 minutes of meeting a man if shell sleep with them. a man decides inside of 5 seconds of seeing a woman
12- all women will sleep with you, its a matter of negotiating the whats and hows to get it there.
13- spend the money on shoes.
14- dont give me one reason why we cant, show me 10 ways we can.
15- if a woman has a tongue ring, she probably will. see rule #12
16- if youre not feeling good about yourself, get a haircut. it always works
17- if an ass kicking or good nights sleep doesnt fix, a hard day of work will.
i have a million of them more to follow. and please enlighten me
1- You don't tug on Superman's cape
2- You don't spit into the wind
3- You don't pull the mask off that old Lone Ranger
4- And you don't mess around with Jim
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