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Bob's your Information Minister
09-26-2010, 04:43 PM
The Raiders, Chargers and Donks are all chasing the Chiefs.

WE ARE YOUR MASTERS

http://i56.tinypic.com/2rrmmb8.jpg

colonelbeef
09-26-2010, 04:45 PM
About time you had a chance to enjoy the sunshine for a bit.

Don't take it for granted, your QB is garbage.

SonOfLe-loLang
09-26-2010, 04:46 PM
Ill bet the chiefs dont last there for long. Just a guess.

Bronco Rob
09-26-2010, 04:46 PM
chefs suck out loud..

Haven't won a playoff game since January of 1994

Haven't been to a Superbowl since January of 1970

Have won 3 playoff games in 40 years.

Truly a irrelevant franchise.



:~ohyah!:




:thumbs:

Rulon Velvet Jones
09-26-2010, 04:47 PM
THE ROAD



Written by

Joe Penhall



Based on THE ROAD by Cormac McCarthy







EXT. CORN FIELD - DAY

The intense BUZZING of summer insects and the SONG of
songbirds. A birds eye view of a bucolic mid west farming
landscape, corn field, blue skies, sunshine, a FARMER
PLOUGHING a nearby field with a TRACTOR, grain silos and a
hay stack. A MAN with a horse. A clapboard house with a
strawberry field, a woman's hand picks strawberries; a WOMAN
lying in grass, lazing...

OPENING CREDITS...

INT. DINING ROOM/HOME - NIGHT

Next to book shelves and an upright piano, with sheet music
on the stand - CHOPIN. There is also a dining room table with
leftovers from an abandoned meal - strawberries and cream.

INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT

MONTH LATER - a warm night, the MAN is asleep with the same
WOMAN, now pregnant, no sheets on the bed. The MAN is
restless and wakes. A distant RUMBLING, indistinct - the MAN
swings his feet off of the bed and goes to the window,
anxious.

INT. BATHROOM - NIGHT

The MAN is in his shorts, sweating, putting a plug in the
bath and turning on the taps as far as they will go. The
WOMAN appears in the doorway in a nightdress and leans
against the door frame watching, blearily, cradling her
pregnant belly.

WOMAN.
Why are you taking a bath?

MAN.
I'm not.
The WOMAN takes off her nightdress and goes to the bath.

WOMAN.
You'll sleep better.
He looks at her, surprised she's misunderstood.

MAN.
I'm not! Put your clothes back on.
She sees he's looking out the window now - there's an eery
rose-colored glow of distant fire through the glass - and
distant shouts and screams...

(CONTINUED)









2.

CONTINUED:

WOMAN.
What is it? What's happening?

END OF FLASHBACK:

TITLE: THE ROAD.

EXT. CAMPSITE - DAWN

A MAN of about forty and a BOY of ten are asleep, camped on a
tarp under a rock ledge, the blackened chasm of a burnt
valley spread out below. It is the same man seen earlier -
but ten years older, thinner, malnourished, with a thick
beard. They are both emaciated and exhausted, their faces and
hands coated in grime and soot from the burned, blackened
landscape around them. Ash falls on the tarp, which is bright
synthetic blue, the only color in sight.
The MAN is woken by something, he instinctively reaches out
to touch the BOY, his hand rests on his chest and rises and
falls with each of the sleeping BOY's breaths.
There is a low RUMBLE, the ground starts to TREMBLE and the
BOY wakes.

BOY.
Papa? (NO REPLY.) Papa?

MAN.
Shh. It's okay.

BOY.
What is it, Papa?
They listen as it grows NEARER and LOUDER, everything
SHAKING, tree roots GROANING and SPLITTING, until it passes
between them with a ROAR like a subway train right beneath
them. The BOY is now clinging to the MAN and crying, his head
buried against his chest in fear.

MAN.
Shh. It's all right. It's all
right. It's gone.

BOY.
What was it, Papa?

MAN.
It was an earthquake.









3.

EXT. ROAD - DAY

In the burnt, barren landscape, through swirls of soft ash
and smoggy air the MAN appears dressed in a filthy old PARKA
with the hood up, a knapsack on his back, pushing a rusted
shopping CART with a bicycle mirror clamped to the handle and
the BLUE tarp now covering it's load. The little BOY,
similarly dressed with a KNAPSACK on his back, shuffles
through the ash at his side - like Depression-era Dust Bowl
homeless.
There is a flicker of lightning over head, then more, but no
thunder.

MAN. (V.0.)
The clocks stopped at one seventeen
one morning. There was a long shear
of bright light, then a series of
low concussions.

EXT. MOUNTAINSIDE/ CRACKED ROAD - DAY

Broken asphalt, the earthquake has caused a large FISSURE to
open up ALONGSIDE the road, with a sheer drop.
THE MAN and THE BOY edge past burnt trees and scrub.

MAN. (V.0.)
Within a year there were fires on
the ridges and deranged chanting.
The screams of the murdered. By day
the dead impaled on spikes along
the road.

EXT. LAKE - DAY

They trudge past a vast lake filled with dead trees...

MAN. (V.0.)
I think it's October but I can't be
sure. I haven't kept a calender for
5 years.

EXT. MOUNTAINSIDE - DAY

They truck along with the trolley through the fog, the
ghostly shapes of dead trees on either side and the shapes of
barren mountains in the background...

(CONTINUED)









4.

CONTINUED:

MAN. (V.0.)
Each day is more gray than the one
before. Each night is darker -
beyond darkness. The world gets
colder week by week as the planet
slowly dies. No animals have
survived. All the crops are long
gone.

EXT. EDGE WOODS - DAY

A tree falls behind them with a WHUMP and they jump...

MAN (V.0.)
Someday all the trees in the world
will have fallen.

EXT. GAS STATION - DAY

The MAN forages for petrol, checking the nozzle of the pumps,
rummaging through empty oil cans, he upends a bin to get at
the empty oil bottles.
The BOY picks up a phone on a wall and listens to the dead
earpiece.

MAN. (V.0.)
The roads are peopled by refugees
towing carts and road gangs
carrying weapons, looking for fuel
and food.

EXT. LONG ROAD - DAY

They head down a long straight road towards a dark,
forbidding looking tunnel - a turnpike.

MAN. (V.0.)
There has been cannibalism.
Cannibalism is the great fear.

EXT. CITY - DAY

They emerge before a view of a deserted city-state...

EXT. MALL - DAY

They forage in a deserted mall...
There are skeletons and human bones here and there.

(CONTINUED)









5.

CONTINUED:

MAN. (V.0.)
Mostly I worry about food. Always
food. Food and our shoes.
CU - the BOY examines the head of a moose mounted on a wall
in a SEARS hunting store.

MAN. (V.0.) (CONT'D)
Sometimes I tell the boy old
stories of courage and justice -
difficult as they are to remember.
All I know is the child is my
warrant and if he is not the word
of God, then God never spoke.

END OF CREDITS/MUSIC.

EXT. RIDGE/ CAMPSITE - (CAMP 2) - EVENING

They are camped high up on the ridge of a mountainside.
There is a camp fire with wet clothes hanging to dry on
sticks beside it.
The MAN is erecting the tarp over string tied between two
sticks stuck in the ground. The BOY is sitting lighting a
lantern using the scavenged oil inside the makeshift tent,
his shadow stark against the illuminated tarp.

BOY.
Now you can read me a story.
He gets out a BOOK and looks at the pictures in the
lamplight.
The MAN reads him a story...

EXT. RIDGE/CAMPSITE - (CAMP 2) - NIGHT

The MAN awakens bathed in firey light as if the sun has come
out. There is pale gray snow all around him with a quivering
orange glow. He gets up to investigate, looks to the line of
trees up the ridge where a FOREST FIRE is burning, CRACKLING
in the distance. He stands staring at the fire, the warmth
and light moving him, enlivening him and not frightening him
at all. The BOY has got up and appears at his side, yawning.
He looks at the sky at a single gray SNOWFLAKE drifting down.

BOY.
It's snowing!

(CONTINUED)









6.

CONTINUED:

MAN.
It's like it used to be when the
sun came out.
The BOY catches the snowflake in his hand, surprised.

EXT. ROAD/PLAIN - DAY

They travel along the road through drifting wood smoke, smoke
pouring off the ground like mist and thin black trees burning
like candles on the snowy ridge.
They reach a spot where fire has crossed the road melting the
tarmac. Their feet stick in the molten tarmac, it sucks at
their shoes and they stop. Just ahead they see a set of foot
prints in the tar and study them.

BOY.
Who is it?

MAN.
I don't know.
The MAN looks through a pair of BINOCULARS and sees: A
stooped figure up ahead, a DYING MAN dragging one leg
slightly, limping along. He stops and stands uncertainly,
then continues. The BOY sees him too.

BOY.
What should we do Papa?

MAN.
We're all right. Let's just follow
and watch.

BOY.
Take a look.

MAN.
Yeah. Take a look.

EXT. ROAD/HILL - LATE AFTERNOON

The DYING MAN is getting slower and slower as they climb a
slope, following, until he finally stops and simply sits in
the road. The BOY hangs onto the MAN's coat anxiously as they
approach.
POV BOY - the DYING MAN is burnt, his clothing scorched and
skin black with soot. One eye is burnt shut and his hair is a
nitty wig of ash. His shoes are bound with wire and coated
with road tar.

(CONTINUED)









7.

CONTINUED:
As they pass by the DYING MAN looks down, averting his eyes.
The BOY keeps looking, unable to take his eyes off him.

BOY.
Papa, what's wrong with that man?

MAN.
He's been struck by lightning.

BOY.
Can't we help him? Papa?

MAN.
No. We can't help him.
They keep walking away and the BOY tugs at the MAN's coat.

BOY.
Papa?

MAN.
Stop it.

Kaylore
09-26-2010, 04:47 PM
The importance of the façade in the life of a politician could not be overemphasized. The art of being unreadable and of maintaining a constant and impermeable camouflage of external serenity was strived for and honed to perfection throughout their careers.

Senator Amidala was a master of that art. Years of hiding behind the masks of both the Queen and the Queen’s handmaiden had turned her own face into a blank slate. Triumph and grief could rage in her spirit and be hidden in her body. She had the ability to show emotion only when she chose to, and to disguise emotion so well as to be thought cold and indifferent.

Looking the embodiment of complete composure, she awaited the Jedi; through the Force, the anxiety radiating from her small stature was almost fever-pitched. The Jedi Master literally had to brace himself against the impact as he and his Padawan approached her. He observed cynically that Anakin made no effort whatsoever to shield himself from the Senator’s emotions. Instead, the Padawan’s senses were open, receiving Amidala’s emotions, welcoming them. Obi-Wan noticed the way Anakin’s eyes seemed to follow the Senator’s every motion, the way they sought to catch her glance and the way she, in turn, avoided them. It was not the first time his Padawan had acted so unconventionally towards Amidala. Obi-Wan was becoming afraid of a very disturbing trend.

“We will be leaving for a meeting with the Council shortly, my Lady. Captain Typho has been left in charge of your security detail. If you follow his instructions, I can assure you that you will be safe.”

The barb was intended and it was not missed. The mask remained intact, but a definite spike of resentment was channelled at him and he felt it through the Force. Obi-Wan did not so much as flinch. His mandate here was bigger than Amidala’s safety. He was also a Jedi Master with a wayward apprentice that might just happen to be the Chosen One. He resented the way Senator Amidala had manipulated Anakin into helping her with her own private agenda and in direct defiance of their mandate - a fact that she was fully aware of. Anakin’s infatuation was painfully obvious to even a casual observer and Obi-Wan had no compunction at squashing it publicly whenever it revealed itself. It was more than merely embarrassing. It was also dangerous. All Jedi had their flaws just as all sentient beings had their weaknesses. But unlike Jedi, most beings had the luxury of displaying their flaws in the guise of being accepted as fallible creatures. A Jedi could not afford to be regarded as anything less than invulnerable. A Jedi with a visible weakness was a beacon to an enemy looking for a loophole to exploit; and the Jedi had many enemies.

Even now, he could feel an empathic wave of feeling rising in his Padawan. Anakin sought out the Senator’s eyes again and this time, she did not glance away. A current of some indefinable emotion, yet strong and foreboding, connected them briefly.

“Good day, My Lady.”

Amidala dismissed them without another word. As they passed out of her private chambers, Captain Typho met them at the doorway.

“My Lady, Senator Organa is in the lobby, requesting to see you.”

“Of course, send -” Amidala stopped abruptly. Then she looked pointedly at Obi-Wan.

“He doesn’t have a prior appointment, does he?” Obi-Wan replied. “What did he state as his business?”

“He heard the news of the assassin’s attempt last night.” Typho replied. “He wants to reassure himself of the Senator’s well being.”

“You may receive him if you choose to, My Lady.” He nodded at Captain Typho. “My Padawan and I are leaving you in capable hands.”

Anakin was bristling by the time they entered the lift. He opened his mouth as the doors closed but Obi-Wan got a word in first.

“I congratulate you, Padawan. You have chosen to challenge me in private and not in public this time.”

Anakin’s mouth twisted as he struggled between replying the snide remark and retorting with what he previously had in mind to say. He chose the latter.

“Padmé has a right to make decisions that affect her own life. She was right to set a trap for the assassin. And she didn’t make me do anything. I helped her because I wanted to -”

“And when did I ever -?” His Master began innocently.

“I heard you. For someone who is always telling me to be mindful of my thoughts - you were literally broadcasting! You have no right to talk to her like that. And we shouldn’t be leaving her alone - with anyone - for any length of time.”

It was remarkable how Anakin Skywalker could still, after ten years, possess the uncanny ability to amuse and infuriate his master at the same time.

“Our directive is to protect Senator Amidala,” Obi-Wan said in clipped tones. “Even if it means protecting her from herself. I do not doubt the Senator’s self-sufficiency. However, we have a job to do. A remarkably simple one as you, my young Padawan, have repeatedly complained to me. For that reason, if not any other, it would be inexplicable if we fail.”

He had struck a little too close to home. Anakin flushed and he looked away guiltily.

“I would never have allowed any harm to come to her,” he muttered.

“That was why you used her as bait for an assassin, of course,” Obi-Wan murmured. “How obvious your concern must be.”

“I never thought of it like that!” Anakin exclaimed earnestly. “I would never have agreed to it if I had. She wanted me to help her. I only wanted to help her. And,” he declared suddenly with a mixture of accusation and triumph, “I wasn’t the one who deserted her and jumped out of a two-hundred storey window to hang onto an assassin droid.”

“Keep to the subject, Padawan,” said his Master sternly. “Which happens to be the severe impairment of your judgment in matters concerning Senator Amidala. I have told you several times already how dangerous your thoughts regarding her can be. How vulnerable -”

“Not another -!”

“And she is a politician.” Obi-Wan continued ruthlessly. “You might have placed her on a pedestal but I certainly have not. And if her actions in this matter have been anything to go by, then I think that my assessment is the right one.”

There was no way to prepare for what came next. One moment, he stood serenely next to Anakin, staring at the city planet beyond the plasti-glass doors while he lectured his seething apprentice. The next moment, he was being flung backward against the window with such force that for a split-second, he thought the glass would shatter beneath his weight.

“Master Obi-Wan!”

His head had hit the glass sharply. Anakin’s cry just managed to keep Obi-Wan’s rein on consciousness. Drawing on the Force, he pulled his body upright. It took a little longer to force his emotions back into equilibrium.

Attacked me. My Padawan attacked me.

“Master Obi-Wan.” Anakin was frantically pulling at him with his hands and the Force. “Master!”

Obi-Wan reined in his panic sharply. “I am all right, Anakin. Compose yourself.” His matter-of-fact voice had the desired effect and Anakin let go at once, visibly calming down. The anxiety in the younger man was real and so was the concern and guilt behind it. And the strong affection with which Anakin’s aura brushed against his was also genuine. But so also had been the hot-tempered malice that had risen against Obi-Wan, the ire that had pushed him against the wall.

“I didn’t do it intentionally,” Anakin was saying. “I swear. I don’t just know what came over me.”

“You lost your temper.” Because I attacked Amidala.

“I - I didn’t mean to.” The words came out agitatedly. “I thought I had – I should have more control…”

“You lost your temper last night as well when we were interrogating the changeling.” Obi-Wan pointed out. And for more or less the same reason.

Whatever Anakin would have said in reply was lost. The glass doors had swung open. They stepped into the lobby of the Naboo Embassy and a protocol droid enabled them to secure a public speeder. Soon, they were zooming through the Coruscant traffic, an uncomfortable silence between them, each lost in his own unpleasant thoughts.

The memory of another disagreeable conversation that had taken place between a different Jedi Master and Padawan pair ten years ago had started playing itself out in Obi-Wan’s head.

The boy is dangerous… why can’t you...?

Obi-Wan winced just as Anakin’s tentative voice broke the silence.

“I suppose I should meditate before the Council convenes for our report?”

Obi-Wan permitted himself a longsuffering sigh. “It is not enough to know when to meditate, my young Padawan,” he said with some asperity. “It is even more important to know on what to meditate and on what not to.” He did not need to send a Force suggestion about on what not to meditate to his Padawan.

Whatever positive effect he had meant to impact was lost. He received an onslaught of negative emotions from his Padawan along their bond: frustration, dejection, irritation directed at him, Obi-Wan. Then Anakin’s aura pulled as abruptly away from his Master’s as a switch being turned off. Obi-Wan glanced sharply at his apprentice to see that the boy had sunk into the pseudo-somnolence of Jedi meditation. The casual insolence of the action literally shocked the Jedi Master into silence. He fought the sudden strong, un-Jedi-like impulse to reach over and smack his apprentice.

As fond as he was of his Padawan, it was times like this that made Obi-Wan Kenobi wonder if he was not in over his head with the boy. One moment everything would be normal (well, not exactly normal, more like typical) and the Jedi Master would be thinking he had his apprentice finally figured out; the next moment, Anakin would act in a manner that defied every concept of Jedi behaviour – conventional and otherwise.

Yet again, Obi-Wan recalled the unrestrained fury that had thrown him in the lift.

There had been accidents in the past. Anakin’s incredible affinity to the Force, late instruction and passionate emotions had made him and others close to him very accident-prone during the early years of his apprenticeship. Over time and under Obi-Wan’s strict but patient direction, the boy had learnt some control and the accidents had become fewer and further in between. It had been a long time since something like this had happened.

They all sense it, why can’t you?

Bronco Boy
09-26-2010, 04:47 PM
Wow, I love The Road.

Rulon Velvet Jones
09-26-2010, 04:49 PM
500 DAYS OF SUMMER



Written by

Scott Neustadter & Michael H. Weber





First Draft



SIMPLE BLACK ON WHITE CREDITS ROLL TO BIG STAR'S "I'M IN LOVE
WITH A GIRL." When all is said and done, up comes a single
number in parenthesis, like so:


(478)
EXT. PARK - DAY

For a few seconds we watch A MAN (20s) and a WOMAN (20s) on a
park bench. Their names are TOM and SUMMER. Neither one says
a word.


CLOSE ON her HAND, covering his. Notice the wedding ring. No
words are spoken. Tom looks at her the way every woman wants
to be looked at.

A DISTINGUISHED VOICE begins to speak to us.

NARRATOR
This is a story of boy meets girl.

CUT TO:


(1)
INT CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY

The boy is TOM HANSEN. He sits at a very long rectangular
conference table. The walls are lined with framed blow-up
sized greeting cards. Tom, dark hair and blue eyes, wears a t-
shirt under his sports coat and Adidas tennis shoes to
balance out the corporate dress code. He looks pretty bored.

NARRATOR
The boy, Tom Hansen of Margate, New
Jersey, grew up believing that he'd
never truly be happy until the day
he met his... "soulmate."

CUT TO:


INT LIVING ROOM - 1989

PRE-TEEN TOM sits alone on his bed engrossed in a movie. His
walls are covered in posters of obscure bands. From the TV,
we hear: "Elaine! Elaine!"

4.



NARRATOR
This belief stemmed from early
exposure to sad British pop music
and a total misreading of the
movie, "The Graduate."

CUT TO:


INT OFFICE CUBICLE - PRESENT DAY

The girl is SUMMER FINN. She files folders and answers phones
in a plain white office. She has cropped blonde hair almost
like a boy's but her face is feminine and pretty enough to
get away with it.

NARRATOR
The girl, Summer Finn of
Shinnecock, Michigan, did not share
this belief.

CUT TO:


INT BATHROOM - 1994

Teenage Summer stares at herself in the mirror. Her hair
extends down to her lower back.

NARRATOR
Since the disintegration of her
parents' marriage, she'd only loved
two things. The first was her long
blonde hair.

She picks up scissors from the counter and begins to slice.

NARRATOR
The second was how easily she could
cut it off... And feel nothing.

CUT TO:


SPLITSCREEN. INT BOARDROOM/ INT CUBICLE - SAME

On the right side of the screen, Tom continues to listen to
some boring presentation. On the left, Summer answers a call,
takes a message, and walks out of her cubicle down a long
narrow hallway.

5.



NARRATOR
Tom meets Summer on January 8th in
a San Francisco office building. In
an instant, he will know she's the
one he's been looking for.

CU Summer opening the door to the boardroom, about to come
face to face with Tom for the first time.

NARRATOR
This is a story of boy meets girl.

But before they do,

CUT TO:

BLACK.

NARRATOR
You should know up front, this is
not a love story.


(240)
EXT STREETS OF SAN FRAN - NIGHT

A 12 year old GIRL rides her bicycle down the block. She
arrives at an apartment complex, jumps off the bike and races
up the front stairs. She rings the doorbell.


INT TOM'S PLACE - LATER

PAUL and MCKENZIE open the door. These are Tom's best friends
since birth. Paul is a doctor and wears hospital scrubs.
McKenzie works in the cubicle next to Tom.

PAUL
I didn't know who else to call.

The Girl removes her bike helmet.

GIRL
You did the right thing. Where is
he?

Tom is in the kitchen breaking things and basically going
insane. About to smash a plate on the floor, he's interrupted
BY:

6.



GIRL
Thomas.

Tom freezes.

TOM
Rachel? What are you doing here?

GIRL (RACHEL)
I'm here to help you.

TOM
Help me how?

RACHEL
First, put down the plate.

Tom slowly obliges.

RACHEL
Now come here and sit down.

Tom sits next to the young girl. Paul and Mckenzie sit on
either side of them.

RACHEL
The key is not to panic.

TOM
I think I'm gonna be sick.

RACHEL
Drink this.

She hands him a glass of water. Tom drinks it down.

MCKENZIE
What is that?

RACHEL
Vodka.

TOM
(grimacing at the taste)
More.

He gulps another down.

TOM
Does Mom know you're here? It's
gotta be past 10.

7.



RACHEL
Don't worry about it. Start from
the beginning. Tell us what
happened...

Tom takes a deep breath.


EXT PARK - DAY

Tom and Summer eat sandwiches in the park.

TOM (V.O.)
We spent the whole day together.


EXT OUTDOOR MARKET - DAY

Tom and Summer walk through the stalls.

TOM (V.O.)
We went shopping.


EXT COFFEE HOUSE - DAY

Tom and Summer seated outside drinking coffee. He reads the
newspaper, she reads a novel.

TOM (V.O.)
We had coffee.


EXT MOVIE THEATER - DAY

Tom and Summer walk out of a movie theatre.

SoCalBronco
09-26-2010, 04:50 PM
The importance of the façade in the life of a politician could not be overemphasized. The art of being unreadable and of maintaining a constant and impermeable camouflage of external serenity was strived for and honed to perfection throughout their careers.

Senator Amidala was a master of that art. Years of hiding behind the masks of both the Queen and the Queen’s handmaiden had turned her own face into a blank slate. Triumph and grief could rage in her spirit and be hidden in her body. She had the ability to show emotion only when she chose to, and to disguise emotion so well as to be thought cold and indifferent.

Looking the embodiment of complete composure, she awaited the Jedi; through the Force, the anxiety radiating from her small stature was almost fever-pitched. The Jedi Master literally had to brace himself against the impact as he and his Padawan approached her. He observed cynically that Anakin made no effort whatsoever to shield himself from the Senator’s emotions. Instead, the Padawan’s senses were open, receiving Amidala’s emotions, welcoming them. Obi-Wan noticed the way Anakin’s eyes seemed to follow the Senator’s every motion, the way they sought to catch her glance and the way she, in turn, avoided them. It was not the first time his Padawan had acted so unconventionally towards Amidala. Obi-Wan was becoming afraid of a very disturbing trend.

“We will be leaving for a meeting with the Council shortly, my Lady. Captain Typho has been left in charge of your security detail. If you follow his instructions, I can assure you that you will be safe.”

The barb was intended and it was not missed. The mask remained intact, but a definite spike of resentment was channelled at him and he felt it through the Force. Obi-Wan did not so much as flinch. His mandate here was bigger than Amidala’s safety. He was also a Jedi Master with a wayward apprentice that might just happen to be the Chosen One. He resented the way Senator Amidala had manipulated Anakin into helping her with her own private agenda and in direct defiance of their mandate - a fact that she was fully aware of. Anakin’s infatuation was painfully obvious to even a casual observer and Obi-Wan had no compunction at squashing it publicly whenever it revealed itself. It was more than merely embarrassing. It was also dangerous. All Jedi had their flaws just as all sentient beings had their weaknesses. But unlike Jedi, most beings had the luxury of displaying their flaws in the guise of being accepted as fallible creatures. A Jedi could not afford to be regarded as anything less than invulnerable. A Jedi with a visible weakness was a beacon to an enemy looking for a loophole to exploit; and the Jedi had many enemies.

Even now, he could feel an empathic wave of feeling rising in his Padawan. Anakin sought out the Senator’s eyes again and this time, she did not glance away. A current of some indefinable emotion, yet strong and foreboding, connected them briefly.

“Good day, My Lady.”

Amidala dismissed them without another word. As they passed out of her private chambers, Captain Typho met them at the doorway.

“My Lady, Senator Organa is in the lobby, requesting to see you.”

“Of course, send -” Amidala stopped abruptly. Then she looked pointedly at Obi-Wan.

“He doesn’t have a prior appointment, does he?” Obi-Wan replied. “What did he state as his business?”

“He heard the news of the assassin’s attempt last night.” Typho replied. “He wants to reassure himself of the Senator’s well being.”

“You may receive him if you choose to, My Lady.” He nodded at Captain Typho. “My Padawan and I are leaving you in capable hands.”

Anakin was bristling by the time they entered the lift. He opened his mouth as the doors closed but Obi-Wan got a word in first.

“I congratulate you, Padawan. You have chosen to challenge me in private and not in public this time.”

Anakin’s mouth twisted as he struggled between replying the snide remark and retorting with what he previously had in mind to say. He chose the latter.

“Padmé has a right to make decisions that affect her own life. She was right to set a trap for the assassin. And she didn’t make me do anything. I helped her because I wanted to -”

“And when did I ever -?” His Master began innocently.

“I heard you. For someone who is always telling me to be mindful of my thoughts - you were literally broadcasting! You have no right to talk to her like that. And we shouldn’t be leaving her alone - with anyone - for any length of time.”

It was remarkable how Anakin Skywalker could still, after ten years, possess the uncanny ability to amuse and infuriate his master at the same time.

“Our directive is to protect Senator Amidala,” Obi-Wan said in clipped tones. “Even if it means protecting her from herself. I do not doubt the Senator’s self-sufficiency. However, we have a job to do. A remarkably simple one as you, my young Padawan, have repeatedly complained to me. For that reason, if not any other, it would be inexplicable if we fail.”

He had struck a little too close to home. Anakin flushed and he looked away guiltily.

“I would never have allowed any harm to come to her,” he muttered.

“That was why you used her as bait for an assassin, of course,” Obi-Wan murmured. “How obvious your concern must be.”

“I never thought of it like that!” Anakin exclaimed earnestly. “I would never have agreed to it if I had. She wanted me to help her. I only wanted to help her. And,” he declared suddenly with a mixture of accusation and triumph, “I wasn’t the one who deserted her and jumped out of a two-hundred storey window to hang onto an assassin droid.”

“Keep to the subject, Padawan,” said his Master sternly. “Which happens to be the severe impairment of your judgment in matters concerning Senator Amidala. I have told you several times already how dangerous your thoughts regarding her can be. How vulnerable -”

“Not another -!”

“And she is a politician.” Obi-Wan continued ruthlessly. “You might have placed her on a pedestal but I certainly have not. And if her actions in this matter have been anything to go by, then I think that my assessment is the right one.”

There was no way to prepare for what came next. One moment, he stood serenely next to Anakin, staring at the city planet beyond the plasti-glass doors while he lectured his seething apprentice. The next moment, he was being flung backward against the window with such force that for a split-second, he thought the glass would shatter beneath his weight.

“Master Obi-Wan!”

His head had hit the glass sharply. Anakin’s cry just managed to keep Obi-Wan’s rein on consciousness. Drawing on the Force, he pulled his body upright. It took a little longer to force his emotions back into equilibrium.

Attacked me. My Padawan attacked me.

“Master Obi-Wan.” Anakin was frantically pulling at him with his hands and the Force. “Master!”

Obi-Wan reined in his panic sharply. “I am all right, Anakin. Compose yourself.” His matter-of-fact voice had the desired effect and Anakin let go at once, visibly calming down. The anxiety in the younger man was real and so was the concern and guilt behind it. And the strong affection with which Anakin’s aura brushed against his was also genuine. But so also had been the hot-tempered malice that had risen against Obi-Wan, the ire that had pushed him against the wall.

“I didn’t do it intentionally,” Anakin was saying. “I swear. I don’t just know what came over me.”

“You lost your temper.” Because I attacked Amidala.

“I - I didn’t mean to.” The words came out agitatedly. “I thought I had – I should have more control…”

“You lost your temper last night as well when we were interrogating the changeling.” Obi-Wan pointed out. And for more or less the same reason.

Whatever Anakin would have said in reply was lost. The glass doors had swung open. They stepped into the lobby of the Naboo Embassy and a protocol droid enabled them to secure a public speeder. Soon, they were zooming through the Coruscant traffic, an uncomfortable silence between them, each lost in his own unpleasant thoughts.

The memory of another disagreeable conversation that had taken place between a different Jedi Master and Padawan pair ten years ago had started playing itself out in Obi-Wan’s head.

The boy is dangerous… why can’t you...?

Obi-Wan winced just as Anakin’s tentative voice broke the silence.

“I suppose I should meditate before the Council convenes for our report?”

Obi-Wan permitted himself a longsuffering sigh. “It is not enough to know when to meditate, my young Padawan,” he said with some asperity. “It is even more important to know on what to meditate and on what not to.” He did not need to send a Force suggestion about on what not to meditate to his Padawan.

Whatever positive effect he had meant to impact was lost. He received an onslaught of negative emotions from his Padawan along their bond: frustration, dejection, irritation directed at him, Obi-Wan. Then Anakin’s aura pulled as abruptly away from his Master’s as a switch being turned off. Obi-Wan glanced sharply at his apprentice to see that the boy had sunk into the pseudo-somnolence of Jedi meditation. The casual insolence of the action literally shocked the Jedi Master into silence. He fought the sudden strong, un-Jedi-like impulse to reach over and smack his apprentice.

As fond as he was of his Padawan, it was times like this that made Obi-Wan Kenobi wonder if he was not in over his head with the boy. One moment everything would be normal (well, not exactly normal, more like typical) and the Jedi Master would be thinking he had his apprentice finally figured out; the next moment, Anakin would act in a manner that defied every concept of Jedi behaviour – conventional and otherwise.

Yet again, Obi-Wan recalled the unrestrained fury that had thrown him in the lift.

There had been accidents in the past. Anakin’s incredible affinity to the Force, late instruction and passionate emotions had made him and others close to him very accident-prone during the early years of his apprenticeship. Over time and under Obi-Wan’s strict but patient direction, the boy had learnt some control and the accidents had become fewer and further in between. It had been a long time since something like this had happened.

They all sense it, why can’t you?

I know you will love this, Khan (3 parts):

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Bronco Boy
09-26-2010, 04:50 PM
Wow, I love 500 days of summer.

Rulon Velvet Jones
09-26-2010, 04:51 PM
A.I. : Artificial Intelligence
The Complete Dialogue

Part Two




SLEAZY MOTEL ROOM

PATRICIA
I'm afraid...

JOE
Of me? That I will hurt you?

PATRICIA
Yes...

JOE
I think... you're afraid of letting go. I think you're afraid of happiness. And this is starting to excite me. Are you afraid of seeing the stars...Patricia? I can show you how to reach them.

PATRICIA
I'm afraid... of what you've got under there. May I see what it looks like first?

JOE
Is this your first time... with something like me?

PATRICIA
I've never been with mecha.

JOE
That makes two of us.

PATRICIA
I'm afraid it will hurt.

JOE
Patricia...once you've had a lover robot, you'll never want a real man...again.
Are these the wounds of passion?

Singer: Are the stars out tonight?
I don't know if it's cloudy or bright.
I only have eyes for you, dear!


PATRICIA
Do you...do you hear that music?

Singer: (note: this is played over Joe's next line)
The moon may be high,
But I can't see a thing in the sky,
'Cause I only have eyes for you,
Yeah...I only have eyes for you!


JOE
You... are a goddess, Patricia. You wind me up inside. But you deserve much better in your life. You deserve... me.

Chorus: 'Cause I only have eyes for you.
The moon may be high,
but I can’t see a thing in the sky
‘Cause I only have eyes for you!




CITY STREET

JANE
Hey, Joe, whaddaya know?

JOE
Hey, Jane, how’s the game?



AT THE HOTEL

FRONT DESK CLERK
Hey, Joe, whaddyaknow?

JOE
Hello, Mr. Williamson. Place a DND on room one-oh-two, please.

MR. WILLIAMSON
Sure thing. (Exhales) 'ere ya go.
Here y'are.

Oh! Joe! Uh, when you're finished here, crack your collar. Show off your operating license. The, uh, flesh fair's in Barn Creek, and the hounds are out hunting for strays.

JOE
It's a good thing I ran into you. Thanks Mr. Williamson.

MR. WILLIAMSON
Sure thing.

JOE
Mustn’t keep a lady waiting.



IN ROOM 102

JOE
Ms. Bevens. It’s Joe. At your service. I’ve been counting the seconds since last we met.
Have you been crying, Samantha? I found a tear.

MR. BEVINS
Hey Joe, whatdya know?
How many seconds has it been, the last time the two of you were together?

JOE
Two hundred and fifty five thousand, one hundred and thirty three.

MR. BEVINS
Goodbye, Sam. And never forget, you killed me first.

JOE
I’m in bad trouble.



IN THE WOODS

DAVID
If I am a real boy, then I can go back. And she will love me then.

TEDDY
How?

DAVID
The Blue Fairy made Pinocchio into a real boy. She can make me into a real boy. I must find her, so I can become real. There must be someone in the whole world who knows where she lives.



ROADSIDE DUMP/WOODS

JUNKYARD MECHA #1 -
Moon on the rise!

DAVID
What is it?

JUNKYARD MECHA #2 -
It's a Flesh Fair. They destroy us on stage. I’ve been there.

DAVID
What do we do?

TEDDY
We run now.



FLESH FAIR BALLOON

LORD JOHNSON-JOHNSON
Any old iron? Any old iron? Any old iron? Any old iron? Expel your mecha. Purge yourselves of artificiality. Come along now, let some mecha loose to run, any old unlicensed iron down there? Hey, see that? Could be a human thing.

BALLOON OPERATOR
No, he’s scanning cold. No expiration date, no ID.

LORD JOHNSON-JOHNSON
What’s a new model doing loose and unregistered?

BALLOON OPERATOR
Sir, it’s a late generation lover mecha.

LORD JOHNSON-JOHNSON
Well, there’s a relief from all this antique iron. You are certain he’s not a man? I wouldn’t want a repeat of the Trenton incident.

BALLOON OPERATOR
Sir, he’s free range mecha, running hot.

LORD JOHNSON-JOHNSON
Let’s reel him in, boys. Sic the hounds on the rest. Shake down Shantytown.



HOUSE IN SHANTYTOWN

MECHA NANNY
What’s your name?

DAVID
My name is David.

MECHA NANNY
Hello David! How old are you?

DAVID
I don’t know.

MECHA NANNY
Do you need someone to take care of you? Would you like a nanny? I have many good references.

DAVID
Do you know where the Blue Fairy lives?

Dagmar
09-26-2010, 04:52 PM
http://www.inewscatcher.com/timages/eb3e1fc9ffa9f88a83a0d1c68416f29a.jpg

Rulon Velvet Jones
09-26-2010, 04:52 PM
Disney's Mulan
Compiled by Barry Adams during theater showings in 1998
Last updated: August 18, 1998

Mulan is the property and copyright of the Walt Disney Company, Inc. The
script on this page was compiled while watching Mulan in the theater during
the summer of 1998 when the film originally aired. Abuse of this page could
result in its removal from this site.

[Chinese guard is seen walking on The Great Wall. Shan-Yu's falcon swoops
down and hits the guard on the head knocking his helmet off. The falcon lands
on top of a flag pole in front of a full moon and lets out a large cry. One
grappling hook comes over The Great Wall. The guard walks over to the edge
and sees many grappling hooks coming towards him]

Guard [yelling]: We're under attack! Light the signal!

[Guard runs to the tower and up the ladder as Hun Bald Man #1 and Hun Long
Hair Man appear trying to stop him. Hun Bald Man #1 breaks the ladder with
his sword just as Guard reaches the top. The guard picks up the torch to
light the fire and sees Shan-Yu jump over the edge of the tower and looks at
him across from the caldron. The guard throws the torch into the caldron
lighting a large fire. Shan-Yu watches as each tower lights their caldrons
one by one]

Guard [sternly]: Now all of China knows you're here.

Shan-Yu [taking the flag and holding it over the fire]: Perfect.

[Cut to the palace. The large doors to the central chamber open as General Li
walks in flanked on his left and right by soldiers and approaches the Emperor.
He bows, then looks up]

General Li: Your Majesty, the Huns have crossed our Northern border.

Chi Fu: Impossible! No one can get through The Great Wall. [The Emperor
motions for Chi Fu's silence]

General Li: Shun-Yu is leading them. We'll set up defenses around your
palace immediately.

Emperor [forcefully]: No! Send your troops to protect my people. Chi Fu,

Chi Fu: Yes, your highness.

Emperor: Deliver conscription notices throughout all the provinces. Call up
reserves and as many new recruits as possible.

General Li: Forgive me your Majesty, but I believe my troops can stop him.

Emperor: I wont take any chances, General. A single grain of rice can tip
the scale. One man may be the difference between victory and defeat.

[Cut to Mulan using her chopsticks to single out a grain of rice on top of the
mound of rice]

Mulan: Quiet and demure...graceful...polite...[picking up some rice with her
chopsticks and eating a mouthful] delicate...refined...poised... [She sets
down her chopsticks and writes down a final word on her right arm] punctual.
[A cock crows] Aiya. [Calling out] Little brother. Little brother. Lit-
ahhh, there you are. Who's the smartest doggie in the world? Come on smart
boy, can you help me with my chores today?

[Mulan ties a sack of grain around Little Brother's waist. She ties a stick
onto Little brother so that end of it is in front of Little Brother's face.
She ties the bone on the end of the stick just out of reach. Little Brother
begins to run after the bone which he cannot reach. Mulan opens the door for
Little Brother and he runs into the door frame, then out the open door.
Little brother runs by the chickens and Khan - the family horse]

[Cut to Mulan's Father, Fa Zhou, kneeling and praying before the Fa family's
ancestors]

Fa Zhou: Honorable ancestors, please help Mulan impress the matchmaker today.


Little Brother [running into the temple and around Fa Zhou scattering grain
around the floor]: Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark.

[The chickens follow Little Brother into the temple and begin to feed on the
grain]

Fa Zhou: Please, PLEASE, help her.

[Mulan steps up to the temple seeing Little Brother on his hind legs trying to
get the bone. Mulan bends the stick down so that Little brother can reach the
bone. Little brother gnaws on the bone happily. Mulan continues toward the
temple]

Mulan [calling out]: Father I brought your--whoop! [Fa Zhou bumps into Mulan.
The cup falls to the ground and Fa Zhou catches the teapot with the handle of
his cane]

Fa Zhou: Mulan--

Mulan: I brought a spare. [Mulan pulls out a cup from underneath the back of
her dress and begins to pour the tea]

Fa Zhou: Mulan--

Mulan [hurried]: Remember, the doctor said three cups of tea in the morning--

Fa Zhou: Mulan--

Mulan: And three at night.

Fa Zhou: Mulan, you should already be in town. We're counting on you to up--

Mulan: --uphold the family honor. Don't worry father. I wont let you down.
[Mulan covers over the writing on her arm with here sleeve] Wish me luck.
[Mulan hurries down the stairs]

Fa Zhou [calling out]: Hurry! [to himself] I'm going to...pray some more.
[Fa Zhou turns and walks back into the temple]

[Cut to the town with Fa Li looking worried]

Bath Lady [poking out of her building]: Fa Li, is your daughter here yet?
The matchmaker is not a patient woman. [She goes back into the building]

Fa Li: Of all days to be late. I should have prayed to the ancestors for
luck.

Grandma Fa [walking in with a Cri-Kee in a cage]: How lucky can they be,
they're dead. Besides, I've got all the luck we'll need. [Speaking to
Cri-Kee] This is your chance to prove yourself. [Cri-Kee chirps approvingly.
Grandma Fa covers her eyes steps into a busy street]

Fa Li [excitedly]: Grandma No!

[The traffic barely misses Grandma Fa as she crosses the busy street. But two
horse and carriage collide causing a big accident. She arrives at the other
side of the street, uncovers here eyes and looks at Cri-Kee]

Grandma Fa: Yep, this cricket's a lucky one. [Cri-Kee falls over out of
fright]

Fa Li [sighing in relief]: Hai.

[Mulan arrives on Khan jumping over the recent accident in the street and
jumps off with hay stuck in her hair]

Mulan: I'm here. [Seeing a stern look from her mother] What? But Mama I had
to--

Fa Li: None of your 'xcuses. Now let's get you cleaned up. [They walk
together into the preparation area]

[Song: Honor to us all]

Bath Lady: [all the while Bath Lady undresses Mulan and pushes her into the
Bath]
This is what you give me
to work with?
Well, honey, I've seen worse.
We're gonna turn
this sow's ear
Into a silk purse. [Bath Lady moves the silk partition aside showing Mulan in
the bath]

Mulan [spoken]: It's freezing.

Fa Li [spoken]: It would have been warm if you were here on time.

Bath Lady [washing Mulan's hair]:
We'll have you
Washed and dried
Primped and polished
till you glow with pride
Trust my recipe for
instant bride
You'll bring honor to us all

Fa Li [grabbing a sponge and Mulan's right arm to start cleaning her. She
notices the writing] [spoken]: Mulan, what's this?

Mulan [Drawing her arm back and batting her eyelashes] [spoken]: Ahh, notes,
in case I forget something?

Grandma Fa [spoken]: Here, hold this [hands the cricket to Fa Li]. We'll
need more luck than I thought. [Mulan looks on with an air of disappointment]

[Cut to the hair dressers]

Hair Dresser 1 [Brushing and combing Mulan's hair much to Mulan's chagrin]:
Wait and see
When we're through

Hair Dresser 2:
Boys will gladly go to
war for you

Hair Dresser 1:
With good fortune

Hair Dresser 2 [Finalizing the hairdo to look exactly like hers]:
And a great hairdo

Both:
You'll bring honor to us all

Fa Li and others: [Mulan following her Mother passes a xiangqi game and
pauses to make an impressive move. Mulan has a smug look on her face when Fa
Li comes back and drags Mulan away]
A girl can bring her family
Great honor in one way
By striking a good match
And this could be the day

Dresser 1 [Dresser 1, Dresser 2, and Fa Li dress Mulan]:
Men want girls
with good taste

Dresser 2:
Calm

Fa Li:
Obedient

Dresser 1:
Who work fast-paced

Fa Li:
With good breeding

Dresser 2 [Pulling the dress tight around her waist]:
And a tiny waist

Mulan [expressing her waist being squeezed tight] [spoken]: huh.

All Three:
You'll bring honor to us all

Chorus: [Mulan follows Fa Li and sees boy stealing a doll from a girl. Mulan
grabs the doll from the boy and returns it to its owner]
We all must serve
our Emperor
Who guards us from the Huns
A man by bearing arms
A girl by bearing sons

Make-up Lady/Fa Li: [Putting on Mulan's face, powder, lipstick and eye liner]
[in a 3 person round]
When we're through
you can't fail
Like a lotus blossom
soft and pale
How could any fellow
say "No sale"
You'll bring honor to us all
[Make-Up Lady holds a mirror so Mulan can see her reflection. Not looking
pleased, Mulan takes her single, short bang and brings it down in front of her
forehead and smiles]

Fa Li [spoken. Fa Li places a hair comb in Mulan's hair]: There, you're
ready.

Grandma Fa [spoken]: Not yet! An apple for serenity [putting an apple in
Mulan's mouth]...A pendant for balance [places a yin-yang pendant under her
sash] [sings]

Beads of jade for beauty [putting beads around Mulan's neck]
You must proudly show it [Grandma Fa raises her chin high with her hand]
Now add a cricket just for luck [putting the cage with Cri-Kee under Mulan's
sash in the back. Cri-Kee doesn't look pleased]
And even you can't blow it

Mulan: [Walking to catch up with the other maidens]
Ancestors
Hear my plea
Help me not to make a fool of me
And to not uproot my fam'ly tree
Keep my father standing tall

Maidens and Mulan: [Mulan taking the parasol from Fal Li and running to fall
in line with the other 4 maidens]
Scarier than the undertaker
We are meeting our
matchmaker

All Townspeople:
Destiny
Guard our girls
And our future
as it fast unfurls
Please look kindly on
these cultured pearls
Each a perfect porcelain doll

Maiden #1: Please bring honor to us
Maiden #2: Please bring honor to us
Maiden #3: Please bring honor to us
Maiden #4: Please bring honor to us
Mulan and Maidens: Please bring honor to us all!

[All Girls and Mulan arrive before the Matchmaker crouched down behind their
parasols. End of song]

Matchmaker [looking at her clipboard]: Fa Mulan

Mulan [Jumping up and raising her hand]: Present.

Matchmaker: Speaking without permission.

Mulan: Oops.

Grandma Fa [to Fa Li]: Who spit in her bean curd?

[Mulan walks into the Matchmaker's building with the Matchmaker following
behind and closing the door]

Matchmaker [looking over Mulan]: Huh, Hmm, too skinny. [Cri-Kee escapes from
his cage. Mulan struggles to catch him] Hmph, not good for bearing sons.
[Mulan puts Cri-Kee in her mouth when Matchmaker turns around to face her]
Recite the final admonition.

Mulan [nodding and smiling]: Mmm-Hmm. [Takes out fan and covers her mouth as
she spits out Cri-Kee] Ptu

Matchmaker: Well...

Mulan [with dignity]: Fulfill your duties calmly and re...f--[looking at her
arm with smeared writing] spectfully. Reflect before you snack [surprised,
Mulan looks at her arm again] act. [now rapidly] This shall bring you honor
and glory. [Fanning herself rapidly and sighing in relief] Huh.

Matchmaker [snatches the fan and looks at it on both sides looking for notes
not finding any. Mulan smiles big when Matchmaker looks at her. Matchmaker
grabs Mulan's right arm pulling her along while smearing the writing and
leaving some ink on her hand] Hmmm, this way. Now, pour the tea [Pushing a
teapot towards Mulan]. To please your future in-laws you must demonstrate a
sense of dignity [Matchmaker smears ink around her mouth. Mulan staring at
Matchmaker pours some tea onto the table then notices her mistake and pours
the tea into the cup] and refinement. You must also be poised. [Mulan
notices Cri-kee in the tea-cup as Matchmaker takes the cup]

Mulan [quiet and timid]: Um, pardon me.

Matchmaker: And silent! [Matchmaker sniffs the tea]

Mulan [reaching and grabbing the teacup]: Could I just take that back...one
moment.

[They struggle for the teacup and it turns over on Matchmaker and Cri-kee
jumps down matchmaker's dress]

Matchmaker: Why you clumsy--[Matchmaker feels Cri-Kee in her dress and dances
around] Wooo, woooo, wooooooo, [Matchmaker knocks over her pot of coals, and
sits down on the coals. Matchmaker jumps around screaming] Ahhhhhhhhhhh
[Mulan grabs her fan and briskly fans the charred area on Matchmaker's behind
causing it to flame up. Mulan looks surprised about her mistake]

[Cut to outside Matchmakers building showing Grandma Fa with much noise coming
from Matchmaker's building]

Grandma Fa [to Fa Li]: I think it's going well, don't you?

Matchmaker [running out of the building screaming]: Put it out! Put it out!
Put it out! [Mulan takes the teapot, throws the tea on Matchmaker and puts out
the fire. She bows, hands the teapot back to Matchmaker and covers her face
as she walks toward Fa Li and Grandma Fa] [with anger] You are a disgrace!
[Matchmaker throws the teapot down smashing it to pieces] You may look like a
bride, but you will never bring your family honor!

[The townsfolk who have gathered whisper and walk away]

[Cut to Mulan walking through the gate with her home leading khan. She looks
sorrowful. Fa Zhou sees his daughter and smiles. Mulan sees her father's
smile. She covers her face with Khan's head and leads him to the water
trough]

[Song: Reflection]

Mulan:
Look at me [looking at her reflection in the water trough]
I will never pass for
a perfect bride [taking off her earrings and beads of jade]
Or a perfect daughter [Mulan watches Fa Li relating what happened at the
Matchmaker's to Fa Zhou]
Can it be
I'm not meant to play
this part? [Mulan releases Cri-Kee back to the wild]
Now I see
That if I were to truly
To be myself [Mulan hops along the bridge railing]
I would break my
family's heart

Dagmar
09-26-2010, 04:54 PM
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/49/Orion_Nebula_-_Hubble_2006_mosaic_edit.jpg

LongDongJohnson
09-26-2010, 05:25 PM
3-0 to 3-2. Garunteed.

ZachKC
09-26-2010, 05:26 PM
3-0 to 3-2. Garunteed.

That is quite a worse case scenario. Still at the top of the division. ROFL!

MrPeepers
09-26-2010, 05:30 PM
you chase zach's sausage.

LongDongJohnson
09-26-2010, 05:31 PM
That is quite a worse case scenario. Still at the top of the division. ROFL!

You realize its week 3 right and the season is 17 weeks.

When the Chiefs get destroyed in their next 2 games and are 6-10 come december you wont be talking as much will you?

Rulon Velvet Jones
09-26-2010, 05:31 PM
LAST CHANCE HARVEY



Written by

Joel Hopkins



Sound of a piano being played. Sparse but beautiful.

FADE IN:


INT. RECORDING ROOM - DAY

HARVEY SHINE, mid-60's, sits at a piano in a scruffy
recording room, tinkering. We hold on his slightly sad,
intense gaze. Just then a shaft of crude light illuminates
him, accompanied by a knocking sound. From behind a studio
window, JOHNNIE, a young rocker type in his 20's beckons.
Harvey closes the piano lid.


INT. STUDIO - DAY

Johnnie, unpacking his lunch and turning on various buttons,
sits at a mixing desk. In front of him are 2 large TV
monitors. Harvey joins him.

HARVEY
Put my score up first.

JOHNNIE
They don't want to hear it, Harvey.

HARVEY
I know, but I want to hear it. Put
it up.

JOHNNIE
I'm backed up already, Harvey.

HARVEY
(interrupting)
Johnnie, you were the one that was
late. Just put it up.

Johnnie reluctantly presses various buttons.

A `cheesy' commercial for a washing detergent plays. It is
accompanied by a jolly classical score. Harvey looks on
forlornly at his work. As it comes to an end with a flourish,
Harvey lowers his head. Beat. Johnnie glances at him.

JOHNNIE
Listen, Harvey. Marvin wants me to
present my ideas while your away.

Harvey looks up, confused.

HARVEY
Huh?

2.



JOHNNIE
Look, I'm not doing myself any
favours here, Harvey. But, I'd
watch your back.

We hold on Harvey's tired, pensive face.


INT. STUDIO CAR PARK / QUEENS - DAY

Harvey hurriedly exits the studio, catching up with a man
walking to his car.

HARVEY
Marvin? Hey, Marvin?

MARVIN
Hey, Harvey. Shouldn't you be in
London?

HARVEY
Yeah, I'm heading there now. What's
going on?

MARVIN
Huh?

HARVEY
Johnnie said something about you
wanting him to present on Monday.

MARVIN
Oh yeah, No, I was just thinking
that, what with you being in London
- you should stay a while.

HARVEY
What?

MARVIN
There's no need to rush back. Enjoy
your daughter's wedding.

HARVEY
What?

MARVIN
Well, Johnnie can do it. I mean, he
can pitch the Samuelson account.

3.




HARVEY
No, I'm coming back. Those are my
connections. They have been for
years.

MARVIN
I know but... they've got new
people running things over there. I
think they're after something...
(beat)
...different.

HARVEY
I want to come back. I should be
there in person.

MARVIN
`There in person'? Harvey, nobody
cares.

HARVEY
I have to stand behind my music!

MARVIN
They're demos! - They're already
pressed. No one needs to be there.
They're not looking for you,
they're not looking for me. They
just need a ****ing track.
(beat/sighs)
Harvey, you haven't booked a top
line in 8 months.

HARVEY
You got me doing triangle chimes
for Christ's sake - give me
something to compose!

MARVIN
That's what I'm trying to tell you!
It's not about composition! It's
different now!

Silence. Harvey looks at Marvin.

MARVIN (CONT'D)
What?

Beat.

HARVEY
I'm back on Monday, Marvin. I'm
coming back.

4.



Beat.

MARVIN
(sighs)
You got to land this one, Harvey.

HARVEY
What are you saying?
(beat)
Say it!

MARVIN
I'm saying there are no more
chances, Harvey.
(beat)
Enjoy London.

And with that Marvin gets in and drives off, leaving Harvey
standing alone in the car park. We hold on his face - he's
tired. He looks about him, then down at his raincoat draped
over his arm. He lifts it and drapes it over the other arm.

CUT TO BLACK.

LAST CHANCE HARVEY

Sound of interior airborne plane. The seat-belt `ping'
chimes.

CUT TO:


INT. PLANE - NIGHT

Harvey, seated in a crowded economy cabin, looks down from
the now extinguished seat-belt light. He looks a little hot.
Reaching up to turn on the air, he knocks his tray - knocking
his drink into his lap.

HARVEY
****!

An attractive middle-aged woman, seated next to him, looks
over.

HARVEY (CONT'D)
(to a passing Stewardess)
Miss? I'm sorry. I've spilt my
drink.

STEWARDESS
I'll get you some napkins.

5.



HARVEY
(to his neighbour)
Why's it always me?

The woman, perhaps wary of the length of the flight, smiles
noncommittally. The Stewardess returns.

STEWARDESS
Shall I take that?

HARVEY
Thanks... And could I get another?

STEWARDESS
A whiskey, wasn't it?

HARVEY
Yes. `Jamesons', no ice.

The Stewardess heads off. Harvey mops himself up. He places
the small mass of wet towels on his tray and sighs. Glancing
out the window, he then turns to the woman.

HARVEY (CONT'D)
A holiday?

The woman looks over.

WOMAN
No. Business.

Harvey nods.

WOMAN (CONT'D)
(feeling obliged)
Yourself?

HARVEY
My daughter's getting married.

WOMAN
Congratulations.

HARVEY
(smiles)
Thank you.
(beat)
She's marrying an American. But for
some reason we've all got to go
over to London.
(smiling)
I told her we had a perfectly good
wedding system here.
(MORE)

6.

HARVEY (CONT'D)
(beat/expecting more of a
response)
They both work there, you see.

The woman smiles again, then looks up as the Stewardess
returns with Harvey's drink.

HARVEY (CONT'D)
Thank you.

Harvey is about to continue speaking when the woman
interrupts.

WOMAN
I'm really sorry but I have a
meeting in the morning and I must
try and get some sleep.

HARVEY
No... Of course. I'm sorry.

WOMAN
It's just, I'll be useless - unless
I get some sleep.

HARVEY
Sure.

The woman covers herself in a blanket and turns out her
light, turning herself away from Harvey.

We hold on Harvey from a distance, spotlit in a sea of
darkness.

FADE TO BLACK.

Sound of a commercial London Radio Station. A `phone-in'
competition takes place.

FADE IN:


EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - MORNING

A radio hangs from a mail trolley. KATE, mid 40's, dressed in
a green uniform, turns into the path of a suburban house. She
passes a postman - who nods his head.

POSTMAN
Morning Kate. Looking lovely as
ever. If I was younger...

7.



KATE
Careful Paddy.
(pointing to her cheek)
Blushing! Is she up?

POSTMAN
Oh yes.

Kate smiles before unlocking the front door.


INT. HALLWAY - MORNING

Kate comes through the door, picking up a small pile of mail
off the floor.

KATE
(calling out)
Mum. It's me - your daughter.


INT. KITCHEN - MORNING

Kate puts the mail on a kitchen table. Just then MAGGIE,
Kate's mum, enters in her dressing gown.

MAGGIE
Hello, my daughter.

They kiss.

MAGGIE (CONT'D)
Have a cup of tea with me.

KATE
I can't, I'm running late.

Maggie seems to ignore this piece of information and heads to
the kettle. Filling it up, she peers out the back window.

MAGGIE
He's at it again.

KATE
(looking through her bag)
Who? At what?

MAGGIE
The neighbour. Barbecuing or
something.

We see her POV of her neighbour busying himself in his back
garden. Smoke rises from a small garden shed.

8.



MAGGIE (CONT'D)
I heard he's from Poland.

KATE
(pulling a small package
from her bag)
So maybe Polish people like to
barbecue a lot. I'm leaving your
prescription on the table.
(beat)
You know, you don't have to keep
taking these - the Doctor said.

MAGGIE
I like to. It makes me feel better.
(beat)
Its 8 o'clock in the morning. Who
barbecues at 8?

KATE
(looking at her watch)
I've got to go. I'll call you
later.

Kate's mum sighs and turns away from the window.

MAGGIE
Of course. Don't worry about me.
I'll be Ok.
(beat)
Have you got that date thing
tonight?

KATE
I don't know, maybe.
(kisses her mother)
Bye Mum.

MAGGIE
`Time and tide', Kate, as your
father liked to say.

Beat.

ZachKC
09-26-2010, 05:32 PM
You realize its week 3 right and the season is 17 weeks.

When the Chiefs get destroyed in their next 2 games and are 6-10 come december you wont be talking as much will you?

ROFL! How much are you gonna bet on that happening?

Rulon Velvet Jones
09-26-2010, 05:33 PM
THE LIMEY


by


LEM DOBBS










draft 08/03/98









NOTE: THE HARD COPY OF THIS SCRIPT CONTAINED SCENE NUMBERS.
THEY HAVE BEEN REMOVED FROM THIS SOFT COPY.










Wilson's first impression of Los Angeles was blue. He was in
the sky at the time, so it was a curious reversal, looking
down rather than up at the color he had always felt was
nature's finest.

Swimming pools. Hundreds of them. Pockmarking the landscape
like miniature lakes. A flat landscape of straight streets
and square blocks and sparse grass that didn't look quite
green enough.

As far as Wilson could remember, he had only ever seen seven
or eight swimming pools in his entire life and they had been
public ones. Here everyone had their own. Marvellous.

There was the one at the Butlin's holiday camp where he had
enjoyed his last legitimate employment -- as driver of a tour
bus. And there was the one at Crystal Palace he had gone to
once or twice when he was younger. He was most familiar,
though, with the Chelsea Baths as he had lived for some time
in a flat nearby in what he now thought of as his good years
-- before he'd gone grey, went to prison, and found himself in
a plane over a foreign town arriving to avenge the death of
his daughter.










WHOOSH! The sound of automatic doors opening and --

EXT. ARRIVALS TERMINAL. L.A. AIRPORT. AFTERNOON.

WILSON steps out into the late sunlight and the heat of the
day. A slow-motion moment while he gets acclimatized. He
wouldn't have ever felt quite this kind of heat before.
After such a rigorously air-conditioned interior. Or seen
cops wearing guns on their belts. Or black cops, for that
matter, with guns on their belts. Or seen people as fat as
Americans on their home turf. Things someone from England
notices immediately, whether consciously at first or not.

CUT.

EXT. MOTEL. EVENING.

Wilson's not here for comfort. Shown to a ****ty room, round
the corner of a typical 2nd-level outside walkway. Airport
close by.

INT. MOTEL ROOM. EVENING.

He draws a curtain open across a window in one strong easy
glide. His moves are neat. His expressions just as
economical, not giving much away. Outside the planes are
practically on top of us. The sunset colors strange and
chemical.

He's only got one light bag. Unzips, unpacks a few things.
Change of clothes, a travel kit, and some familiar items
(shaving foam/toothpaste/deodorant} bearing unfamiliar
British brand names.

Goes into the bathroom. Turns on the shower in there.

Comes back to sit on the bed. Takes an envelope out of his
jacket.

ENVELOPE

Turns it over to see the return address on the back.

CUT.

INT. TAXI. NIGHT.

Wilson in the back. Stares at the impenetrable name on the
driver's posted ID. Glances at the driver.

DRIVER glances back at his quiet passenger in the rearview
mirror.

CUT.

EXT. SMALL HOUSE. NIGHT.

Wilson walks up a cracked little path to the front door.
Lower middle-class street. Two cars in the driveway, one
behind the other. Lights on inside the house -- as he rings
the bell.

ED RAMA

Answers it. Hispanic. Late 30's. Chairman Mao on his T-
shirt notwithstanding, an easygoing sort of fellow. Not
looking for any trouble -- anymore. But once did, and able
to handle himself if any shows up. Which it has.

WILSON
Edward Rama?

ED
Eduardo.
(rolling the R)
Rama.

WILSON
You're home, then.

He turns, waves away the taxi he's kept waiting. While
Eduardo Rama waits for an introduction.

WILSON
My name's Wilson.

Accent speaks for itself. Hard, working-class.

ED
Wilson?

Knows the name. But just now it's unexpected. He's holding
a hot TV dinner, hand protected by a dish towel.

WILSON
You wrote to me about my daughter.

CUT.

INT. ED'S HOUSE. NIGHT.

Ed takes Wilson inside.

ED
I didn't expect anyone.

WILSON
No reason.

ED
I mean, what has it been -- six months?

WILSON
Round about, yeah.

They've entered a cauldron of family life. TV blaring
(SHOWBIZ TONIGHT!). A couple of younger KIDS yelling "Mama".
Their MOTHER shouting back at them from the kitchen (in
Spanish) that she only has two hands. A sullen TEENAGER
walking by.

ED
I didn't even know who I was writing to --
just someone with the same last name.
She never talked about any family.

WILSON
It was better than a telegram.

Ed opens a screen door to the backyard.

EXT. ED'S BACKYARD. NIGHT.

They sit at an outdoor table. Wilson with a TV dinner in
front of him now too. Sounds from inside MUTED. Even this
little house has a little pool.

WILSON
Who done it, then?

ED
Huh?

WILSON
Snuffed her.

Ed surprised at Wilson's directness. Ed stands nervously.

ED
Now, wait up a second, man.

And paces back and forth.

ED
I never said nothin' about nothin' like
that. No, no, no. That's not what I
wrote to you.

WILSON
No, but between the lines, eh?
Mysterious circumstances, and that.

Ed stops pacing.

ED
Look, I sent you that newspaper clipping,
all right? I told you what I know. It
was an accident. I didn't say anything
about anybody being "snuffed."

Beat.

WILSON
This bloke she was bunked up with. This
Terry what'sit.

ED
Terry Valentine.

WILSON
Valentine. What's he got to say for
himself?

ED
I dunno. What's he gonna say? They had
a fight that night, she drove away, she
was upset? I don't even know the guy.
Don't get me wrong, Jenny and me were
friends, but we didn't travel in the same
social circles. She had her life, I had
mine.

Makes a kind of scoffing gesture: and you can see what my
life is.

ED
Valentine came into the restaurant where
I work with Jenny a couple times. He's a
money guy. Jenny would say, hey, here's
my friend Eddie and he would shake my
hand and everything, but he wouldn't even
see me, you know what I mean.

Wilson gazes up at the sky. Clear night. Stars.

WILSON
How long had she been in the States?
(as if to himself, somewhat
wistful)
Near on ten years, wasn't it? Long
enough to know her way about, I reckon.

Ed leans down, palms on the tabletop, facing Wilson.

ED
There was an investigation, okay? The
car was totalled. Jennifer was ... Her
neck was broken. On impact, they said.
So she wouldn't have ... felt the effects
of the fire.
(helpless shrug)
It happens up there. Happens a lot.
What more can I tell you.

Wilson taps out a cigarette from a pack of "Silk Cut" he's
produced from his pocket.

WILSON
What more is there.

ED
I'm just sayin' -- it was a steep
hillside. There was no moon that
night ...

Wilson's quiet stillness is getting to him.

ED
Coulda happened to anyone, man. I never
knew her to be reckless. I mean, sure,
she would smoke a little grass, or
something, have a few drinks. But that's
it, nothing more than that.

WILSON
No, not my girl. Self-control, she had.
Point of pride.
(smokes)
And people don't change, do they.

ED
I dunno ... Maybe they do.

Wilson notes the tattoos on Ed's forearms.

WILSON
Going straight, are ya.

Ed looks at him. Sits down again. Keeping his forearms under
the table.

ED
(looks away)
Boomerang.

WILSON
Y'what?

ED
I knew when I was droppin' that letter
into the mail slot it was gonna come back
and smack me in the face.
(looks at Wilson again)
I did my time, okay? My sister, her ol'
man's up in Chino right now doin' eight
years.

WILSON
(re the family inside)
This ain't your lot?

ED
You kiddin', man? I don't need a wife
and screamin' kids. I still got my
youth.

And yet -- he lives here. Wilson declines to pursue the
matter.

ED
I go to work, try to keep my life
together, put all that **** behind me,
man. What d'you want from me.

WILSON
(calmly smoking)
I only asked.

Ed sighs. Reaches for one of Wilson's cigarettes.

ED
Couple weeks before she died, Jennifer
asked me to drive her downtown. Said she
was meeting -- her boyfriend --
Valentine. But I think she was looking
for him.

FLASH CUTS:

ED AND JENNIFER. In a car, downtown. She has the same steely
intensity as her father. Ed looks a little worried.

WILSON
(lighting Ed's cigarette)
What, tryin' to catch him with another
bird?

ED
That's what I thought, man. But it was
not a hotel or nothin' that we went to.
It was someplace else.

WILSON
Where abouts?

FLASH CUTS:

JENNIFER. Talking to a beefy SUPERVISOR. Or talking at him.
Either way, he isn't happy.

MEAT PUPPETS. Watch instead of working.

ED. Taking all this in.

ED
Bad place, man. Bad people. Some guys
loading some trucks. Some kinda deal
goin' down.
(anticipating Wilson's next
question)
I don't know and I don't care. Maybe
they're shipping fava beans to Eskimos.

WILSON
Did Jenny know?

ED
(shrugs)
Valentine wasn't even there. If he was
into something, if she was involved --
who can say.
(stands up again)
But I'll tell you something. She stood
in front of these dudes, man. Eyeballing
them. Checking them out.
(beat)
I felt like she was covering my ass that
day.

Unconsciously rubbing his arms where his tattoos are.

ED
I drove her back to Valentine's house.

FLASH CUT:

VALENTINE. Standing in front of his house. His expression
says: We have something to discuss.

ED
He was standing outside waiting for her.
That's the only other time I ever saw
him.
(a short sad note)
Last time I saw her.

He meets Wilson's gaze. As hard and pointed as a drill
through his skull.

CUT.

INT. ED'S CAR. NIGHT.

Ed drives Wilson back to his motel. Wilson silent. Ed still
not quite sure who he's dealing with. Is this really or
merely a grieving dad?

ED
What you gonna do, man? You gonna go to
the cops?

WILSON
Nah, coppers don't do nothing, do they.

ED
Those streets up in the hills, man.
Gotta be real careful, keep your eye on
the ball. Two o'clock in the morning,
it's dark, your mind is all agitated,
you're drivin' a little too fast ...
(beat)
Those curves don't kid around.

Could be talking about the girl. Wilson doesn't move. But
touch him, he'll explode. Out the window lights are passing,
but no landmarks. He might as well be on the moon.

ED
You should talk to Elaine. That was her
best friend.

WILSON
She didn't write to me, did she.

ED
She didn't know what to say.
(shrugs)
I thought someone should say something.
To someone. With me it was, I don't know
-- Jenny liked me for some reason. I
felt like I owed her.

WILSON
Who'd Jenny get it off of -- this grass
or whatever?

ED
(self-conscious again)
Not me, man. I'm no drug dealer, what
you think.

WILSON
(re Ed's tattoos)
I think you didn't get that lot in the
Navy, doing your National Service.

ED
I already told you, man. Corcoran. Know
what that is? State prison.

WILSON
Nick's a nick, n' it? No matter what
state you're in. State of remorse, most
likely -- for gettin' caught.

ED
But that's not me anymore. That's when I
was into the gang lifestyle. That's not
who I am now. Five years in the joint --
that's it for me, man.

Now Wilson drops the clanger.

WILSON
Just got out meself, didn't I.

And Ed turns. Looks at Wilson. Fellow ex-con.

TheElusiveKyleOrton
09-26-2010, 05:33 PM
The Raiders, Chargers and Donks are all chasing the Chiefs.

WE ARE YOUR MASTERS

http://i56.tinypic.com/2rrmmb8.jpg

MASTER Baiter.

scorpio
09-26-2010, 06:05 PM
ITT: weak ****.


and unfortunately I'm not talking about Bob.

DomCasual
09-26-2010, 06:13 PM
Wow. You guys win the 3-game AFC West crown. Last year, we were the '72 Dolphins for twice as long as this. It was awesome. I will hold onto those memories forever.

chadta
09-26-2010, 06:14 PM
bob was seen out celebrating with his wife/sister, she even let him wear his crown out in public

http://declubz.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/big-ass-hamburger.jpg

That One Guy
09-26-2010, 06:32 PM
Haha... I see what you guys did there!

You thought "food jack!" time but then realized a thread full of food would obviously keep Bob around. Then you thought, "What can repulse him so bad he never returns?" and short stories were the answer. Alas, no Bob posts since.

Bob's your Information Minister
09-26-2010, 06:38 PM
Sorry, was busy drinking your tears.

Steve Sewell
09-26-2010, 06:45 PM
I AM A MASTURBATOR


Quoted for truth

Bob's your Information Minister
09-26-2010, 06:47 PM
You're damn right, Steve. This is fap worthy.

http://i53.tinypic.com/zvodhu.gif

dumpy
09-26-2010, 06:58 PM
sorry, was busy licking your rears.

fyp

Steve Sewell
09-26-2010, 07:06 PM
You're damn right, Steve. This is fap worthy.

http://i53.tinypic.com/zvodhu.gif

Did you call him Dex? Really? Wow.

Bob's your Information Minister
09-26-2010, 07:10 PM
What's wrong with that? It's cool. He's cool.

L.A. BRONCOS FAN
09-26-2010, 07:29 PM
Boob hasn't been this excited since the last time his great grandpa told him all those stories about the Chorfs' SB win.

That One Guy
09-26-2010, 07:32 PM
You're damn right, Steve. This is fap worthy.

http://i53.tinypic.com/zvodhu.gif

Bob's so worn on out internet porn, he's declaring guys with long hair "fap worthy" just for a change.

Maybe he truly has moved on from big girls like he claimed.

Indian Pony
09-26-2010, 07:33 PM
Boob hasn't been this excited since the last time his great grandpa told him all those stories about the Chorfs' SB win.

Oh, I bet he was pretty jacked the last time the Chiefs went 13-3. Unfortunately, they met the Colts in the playoffs. I bet y'all are in touch with that emotion.

TheElusiveKyleOrton
09-26-2010, 09:44 PM
You're damn right, Steve. This is fap worthy.

http://i53.tinypic.com/zvodhu.gif

I bet your "dates" are really impressed with your .gif creation skillz.

SoCalBronco
09-26-2010, 09:47 PM
Bob's so worn on out internet porn, he's declaring guys with long hair "fap worthy" just for a change.

Maybe he truly has moved on from big girls like he claimed.

Ok.......that was funny.

Bob's your Information Minister
09-26-2010, 11:06 PM
I bet your "dates" are really impressed with your .gif creation skillz.

I don't date during football season.

Especially not when the Chiefs are 3-0.

Steve Sewell
09-26-2010, 11:28 PM
What's wrong with that? It's cool. He's cool.

http://megaouaoua.canalblog.com/you_re_a_homo.jpg

Bob's your Information Minister
09-26-2010, 11:39 PM
http://megaouaoua.canalblog.com/you_re_a_homo.jpg

<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/3j4t185wl-0?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/3j4t185wl-0?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>

L.A. BRONCOS FAN
09-27-2010, 04:24 AM
Oh, I bet he was pretty jacked the last time the Chiefs went 13-3. Unfortunately, they met the Colts in the playoffs. I bet y'all are in touch with that emotion.

Back2back SBs (both of which happened in my lifetime) tend to put those things in perspective. :yayaya:

Tom A Hawk
09-27-2010, 05:50 AM
3-0 to 3-2. Garunteed.

anything is possible right?.......6-2 then 2-6.

Pony Boy
09-27-2010, 07:48 AM
Bob enjoy the next two weeks but we will see how you measure up when you play Indy at their house. I predict a blood bath, Manning will pick you to peices and Casel may not get out alive.

ZachKC
09-27-2010, 07:52 AM
Bob enjoy the next two weeks but we will see how you measure up when you play Indy at their house. I predict a blood bath, Manning will pick you to peices and Casel may not get out alive.

The drama!

Pony Boy
09-27-2010, 07:58 AM
The drama!

Well, the funny part is you have 2 weeks to prepare for the ass kicking, knowing there's not a thing you can do about it.

Smiling Assassin27
09-27-2010, 07:59 AM
I don't think one can consider themselves 'master' of anything after 3 games in a 16 game season. But if it gets you off, enjoy it, bro.

ZachKC
09-27-2010, 08:07 AM
Well, the funny part is you have 2 weeks to prepare for the ass kicking, knowing there's not a thing you can do about it.

Hey, I am just glad a team like Indy would even schedule a game with us.

Rulon Velvet Jones
09-27-2010, 08:09 AM
BATMAN 2


Screenplay By Sam Hamm









FIRST DRAFT









NOTE: THE HARD COPY OF THIS SCRIPT CONTAINED SCENE NUMBERS.
THEY HAVE BEEN REMOVED FOR THIS SOFT COPY.

NOTE ALSO: THE HARD COPY OF THIS SCRIPT WAS IN THE NON-
PREFORMAT FONT "BOOKMAN OLD". THIS HAS BEEN CHANGED TO
PREFORMATTED TEXT FOR THIS SOFT COPY.










EXT. GOTHAM SQUARE - DUSK

It's finally happened. Hell's frozen over.

Christmas is two weeks off, arid SNOW is falling in Gotham.
Beneath its pristine white blanket, the city looks
uncharacteristically serene -- almost inviting. Peace has
been miraculously restored: strangers wave hello. Salvation
Army Santas ring their bells on streetcorners. And now, as
night falls, an ILLUMINATED SIGN winks on above Broad Avenue:
"JOYEUX NOEL GOTHAM -- Only 16 Shopping Days Left Till
Christmas."

The streets are bustling with jolly shoppers. At a souvenir
store, we find an exasperated MOM squabbling with her seven-
year old. Like many other storefronts in Gotham, this one is
overflowing with bootleg BATMAN MERCHANDISE: t-shirts, key
chains, ceramic figurines. The kid is already wearing a
Batman baseball cap and a little black cape, but he obviously
wants more.

Mom drags him off past another store window, this one full of
SCRAP METAL, with a sign reading "AUTHENTIC FRAGMENTS OF THE
BATWING -- $19.95 and up." A PANHANDLER is perched at the
entrance. Beneath his array jacket is a grubby sweatshirt
with the familiar yellow-and-black logo. In Gotham this
winter, Batmania is everywhere...

EXT. GOTHAM SQUARE - LATER THAT NIGHT

Two hours later, the SNOWSTORM's grown into a full-fledged
blizzard. The drifts are two feet deep and the streets are
all but empty of cars. A massive SNOW PLOW the size of a
Panzer tank rumbles past, FILLING THE FRAME...

...and revealing, as it passes, a group of CAROLERS, all
bundled up in mufflers and parkas. Unbothered by the weather,
they walk the street singing, spreading cheer and goodwill to
the few passersby.

They've just gone into a lovely a capella rendition of "Silent
Night" when an oversized DELIVERY TRUCK, outfitted with snow
chains, clanks slowly past in the wake of the plow. Its sides
are decorated with cartoon igloos advertising a popular ice
cream snack -- POLAR BARS -- oddly inappropriate for this time
of year.

A streetcorner SANTA, with bell and bucket, WAVES at the truck
as it rounds a corner. The CAROLERS carol. Then --

-- a VIOLENT EXPLOSION rocks the street -- followed by the
sound of AUTOMATIC GUNFIRE and a high, wailing SECURITY ALARM.

EXT. SCHRACH AND CO. - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT

Around the corner there's CARNAGE on the streets. The windows
have blown out of Gotham's leading jewelry store. Gut-shot
SECURITY GUARDS stagger and go face down in the snow as
ROBBERS, dressed in white camouflage gear, clamber out through
the shattered glass with SACKFULS OF LOOT.

CAROLERS spill around the corner to see what's going on, but a
spray of GUNFIRE sends them scattering in panic. The POLAR
BAR truck pulls even with the jewelry store, and as it does...

The REAR DOORS open. A RAMP slides down from the back of the
truck. The ROBBERS scramble aboard, and mere seconds later
SLIDE out AGAIN -- riding atop five SKIDOO SNOWMOBILES.

SIRENS HOWL. A POLICE CAR appears, taking the corner just a
trifle too fast -- FISHTAILING on the icy street and plowing
into a drift.

INT. SQUAD CAR - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT

The COPS gun the engine, but their wheels are spinning in the
snow -- no traction. They're about to climb out and give
chase on foot when, through the windshield, they see the
Salvation Army SANTA...

...HOISTING AN AK-47 AND FIRING DIRECTLY AT THEM. The
windshield disintegrates and the COPS sink from view as SANTA
races off to the last of the snowmobiles, which is already
burdened with LOOT.

EXT. STREET - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT

MORE SQUAD CARS converge on the jewelry store -- but it's
difficult to carry on a high-speed pursuit when the snow's a
foot deep and the best you can do is 6 MPH. The COP CARS skid
to a halt, blocked by the rumbling SNOWPLOW. By now, of
course, the LOOTERS are gone -- scooting off on either side of
the plow, sticking to the snowy sidewalks.

EXT. STREETS - A MOMENT LATER - NIGHT

SNOWMOBILES glide across the sidewalks, sending the few hardy
souls who are out on the streets DIVING FOR COVER. A couple
of DERELICTS are cowering behind a fire hydrant, trying to
avoid getting run over. Every time they poke their heads out,
another SKIDOO whizzes past, missing them by inches.

The ROBBERS fan out in various directions. These guys are
obviously going to get away clean -- unless...

The DERELICT points up at the night sky, where a BEACON is
blazing in the darkness -- THE BLACK SILHOUETTE OF A BAT...

INT. POLICE CAR - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT

MORE SIRENS. A COP takes a radio call as he streaks down the
long wide avenue which borders Gotham Park -- one of the few
streets which is relatively clear. The COP at the wheel goes
wide-eyed and nudges his partner in disbelief.

Before their eyes, FIVE SNOWMOBILES appear from the cross
streets up ahead and CONVERGE at the entrance to Gotham Park.
Bringing up the rear is SANTA CLAUS.

COP
What the hell -- ?

EXT. ENTRANCE TO PARK - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT

BRAKES SQUEAL. Several squad cars are now massed at the
entrance to the park -- but there's one problem. The city's
snow plows don't operate on the park roads -- and the entrance
is blocked off with SAWHORSES reading "CLOSED TO TRAFFIC." A
huge steep drift prevents them from entering -- and so all
they can do is stand by helplessly, WATCHING as the
snowmobiles vanish into the trees.

The COPS race about like headless chickens, trying to concoct
a plan. A couple of them are trying to scale the stone walls
of the park. Another is at his car, barking into a radio
mike:

COP WITH MIKE
Yeah, you heard me. Snowmobiles!
(pause)
So what do we do? Chase 'em on foot??

ALL EYES TURN at the blare of a horn. The COPS peer down the
long corridor of the cross street -- and see a STRANGE BLACK
VEHICLE barreling toward them at 90 MPH, with no intention of
stopping...

THE BATMOBILE!! COPS dive left and right. A split-second
later...

...a FORTY-FOOT JET of NOVA-INTENSITY FLAME erupts from the
front of the jet-black supercar -- instantaneously DISSOLVING
the drift that blocks the entrance to the park -- turning the
ice and snow on the paths before it into water!

The BATMOBILE screams past in the wink of an eye. The COPS
get to their feet; cold as it is, they're sweating. One of
them mops his brow and announces, dumfounded:

COP I
...That was Batman.

COP II
NO ****!!

COP II yanks COP I into the nearest squad car, and the others
follow suit. ENGINES REV. As long as the BATMOBILE's cleared
a path, they might as well join in the chase...

EXT. BRIDLE PATH - THAT MOMENT

TWO BURLY TEENAGERS -- both dressed in RED BERETS and PARKAS
with BLACK BATMAN SWEATSHIRTS visible underneath -- are
trudging along the path when they're STARTLED by a pair of
speeding SKIDOOS. Moments later, they spot a RED GLOW on the
horizon...

...and their JAWS DROP as the BATMOBILE roars into view,
BURNING OFF THE SNOW IN ITS PATH. Thrilled beyond words, they
WHOOP WITH GLEE, slapping high-fives as the car streaks past.

INT. BATMOBILE - ON BATMAN - THAT MOMENT

His face is weirdly illuminated by the flame still spitting
from the front of the car. Cool as ever -- approaching the
chase as a simple problem in logic -- he checks a radar
display on his dashboard and sees FIVE BLIPS.

EXT. PARK - ON SQUAD CARS - THAT MOMENT - NIGHT

The cops follow along in BATMAN's path. The lead car LOSES
CONTROL and plows headlong into a drift. The DRIVER jams the
pedal, but his rear wheels end up digging a deep rut in the
ice. He sits there cursing, pumping the accelerator as other
COPS race past him on foot.

INT. BATMOBILE - ON BATMAN

The various ROBBERS have spread out, their vehicles BOUNDING
over the hilly terrain of the park. He spots two of them up
ahead; as he draws closer, they PART WAYS, veering off to the
left and right...

ANGLE ON BATMOBILE - MOVING

PODS OPEN on the front fenders, and MISSILE LAUNCHERS rotate
into place. The Batmobile fires a pair of HEAT-SEEKING
TORPEDOS, which BURROW into the snow on either side and
disappear.

ANGLE ON LEFT SNOWMOBILE - MOVING

The DRIVER looks back over his shoulder and sees what appears
to be a BLACK SHARK FIN plowing through the snow behind him,
GAINING FAST. He takes evasive action, but the SHARK FIN
always seems to follow. Just as he approaches the crest of a
hill...

...the TORPEDO slams into the rear of the SNOWMOBILE. The
force of impact knocks the ROBBER cleanly off. His LOOT lands
in the snow beside him, but the SNOWMOBILE keeps going --
sailing over the crest of the hill and striking the rocks
beyond with a deafening EXPLOSION.

ANGLE ON RIGHT SNOWMOBILE - MOVING

This ROBBER's a little smarter than his buddy. When he sees
the shark fin on his tail, he noses his snowmobile off into a
GROVE OF TREES. The trees are too closely spaced for the
torpedo to maneuver; it strikes the nearest tree trunk and
explodes harmlessly.

The ROBBER is feeling good about himself, because the
Batmobile can't follow either. But BATMAN has a Plan B. As
he drives alongside the grove, he HITS THE ACCELERATOR,
passing the snowmobile on its left. A STEEL SPIKE attached to
a cable launches from the side of the Batmobile and WEDGES
ITSELF into a distant TREE.

The cable goes taut, and the tree TOPPLES -- directly into the
path of the second SNOWMOBILE. The vehicle crashes into the
trunk, and the hapless ROBBER goes cartwheeling head-over-
heels into a drift.

In the distance, COPS appear -- racing to the scene on foot,
ready for mop-up duty. BATMAN kills the flamethrower, hits
the brakes, and FISHTAILS, doing a quick 180 on the snow.
He's just spotted fresh quarry: snowmobiles three and four,
whizzing over a rolling white pasture in the distance.

EXT. PARK - THAT MOMENT

We're at a makeshift CAMPSITE -- where a cluster of HOMELESS
PEOPLE are burning refuse in a garbage can to keep warm. They
look on in puzzlement as the two SNOWMOBILES whiz past and
disappear over a crest of a hill...

EXT. LAKEFRONT - ON SNOWMOBILES #3 AND #4

They bounce down the hillside and SKID -- arriving at the edge
of a frozen-over LAKE. With the roar of the Batmobile behind
them, the two DRIVERS get the same idea simultaneously.
Smiling, they rev their engines and set out over the surface
of the lake.

Now the Batmobile crests the ridge. The car's weight tips
suddenly and it begins to skid down the hill toward the lake.
BATMAN sees what's happening and kills the flamethrower just
in time -- but he can't brake the car on the snowy slope. The
prow of the Batmobile slides out onto the edge of the lake --

-- and under its weight, the ICE begins to crack. The left
front tire takes a sudden dip -- and worse yet, the car is
sliding forward.

INT. BATMOBILE - ON BATMAN

He shifts frantically from drive to reverse, trying to rock
the car out of its predicament, but his rear wheels find no
purchase. He can hear the ice cracking beneath him.
Grimacing, he throws a switch on the dashboard --

EXT. LAKE - ON BATMOBILE

-- and the trunk pops open. An industrial-strength GRAPPLING
HOOK shoots upward and digs in at a point beyond the crest of
the hill; and a concealed WINCH ASSEMBLY begins to grind away,
hauling the Batmobile uphill, out of danger.

INT. BATMOBILE - ON BATMAN

Suspended just above the icy lake, he sees the SNOWMOBILE
vanishing into the distance. He opens (yet another) panel on
the dashboard...

EXT. LAKE - ON SNOWMOBILES #3 AND #4

The ROBBERS give each other a big thumbs-up. They're almost
halfway across the lake now and the Batmobile is disabled.
All at once they hear a strange WHISTLING overhead...

Fireworks? No, it's a THERMITE BOMB -- rocketing past them,
hitting the ice some forty feet ahead and EXPLODING GAUDILY.
JAGGED CHUNKS OF ICE break free and SHIFT in the frigid water
-- and the ROBBERS are skidding into the drink before they
know what's hit them.

ANGLE ON SNOWMOBILE #5 - MOVING

The last of the robbers is SANTA CLAUS -- his big sack filled
not with toys, but precious stones. He approaches the edge of
the park, negotiating his way through a maze of rocky
outcroppings. He squirts out from behind a boulder into a
clearing...

...and GASPS in PANIC as a SEARING BURST OF FLAME erupts
behind him. The BATMOBILE speeds out from the other side of
the boulder; SANTA twists his accelerator, desperately trying
to build up speed.

As it is, he's barely managing to stay ahead of the
flamethrower. But the jet of flame suddenly DIES; the HOOD of
the Batmobile rises half a foot --

-- and TWIN PROJECTILES launch into the air. A heavy NET is
strung between them -- and it lands SMACK ON TOP OF SANTA
CLAUS, entangling the snowmobile and stopping him in his
tracks.

Immobilized, he watches through the net in horror as the
Batmobile barrels down. When the great black machine is
almost atop him --

-- it stops on a dime six inches from his heavily-padded
frame.

EXT. ENTRANCE TO PARK - A MINUTE LATER - NIGHT

The COPS are spread out near the entrance. They've rounded up
the other ROBBERS and returned most of the loot. They hear a
dull ROAR in the distance...

...and a few seconds later the BATMOBILE streaks into view,
dragging the NET behind it -- SANTA, his loot, and his
snowmobile, all tied up in one tidy parcel.

At the entrance to the park, the NET detaches itself from the
Batmobile, dumping SANTA into the hands of the waiting COPS.
Without stopping, the BATMOBILE roars out of the park and
vanishes whence it came. A mildly-humiliated COP turns to his
colleague and SHRUGS:

COP I
...Merry Christmas.

The second COP points to SANTA, still struggling in the net.

COP II
Gift-wrapped and everything.

Hogan11
09-27-2010, 08:23 AM
Lessee, KC beats a notoriously slow starting SD team that is missing some key personel in horrendous weather, check.

Then narrowly beats a crap Cleveland team, check.

Then beats up on a SF team that (despite all the preseason talk) everyone should've known were going to be garbage (A. Smith reeks of fail) not to mention the team is in a practical lockerroom revolt against the HC...oh yeah, that just screams gametime focus ::)

Enjoy it whilst you can, because Indy & Houston are not only going to beat KC, but they're going to make the Chiefs look absolutely foolish.

ZachKC
09-27-2010, 08:25 AM
Enjoy it whilst you can, because Indy & Houston are not only going to beat KC, but they're going to make the Chiefs look absolutely foolish.

Will it be Absolute Embarrassing?

ZachKC
09-27-2010, 08:27 AM
I still enjoy that in the worst case scenario of total domination in the next few games we are still having a laugh at the top of the league.

I bet we snag one of those games.

Hogan11
09-27-2010, 08:30 AM
Will it be Absolute Embarrassing?

From what I've seen thus far, it should be beyond that.

ZachKC
09-27-2010, 08:35 AM
From what I've seen thus far, it should be beyond that.

Are you gonna run away if your predictions don't happen like that like the guys who made this thread?

http://orangemane.com/BB/showthread.php?t=93922

That is the fun part of this game. It was supposed to be the 49ers game where the Chiefs got thumped and brought back to Earth. I guess we will just have to keep moving those goal posts won't we.

Hogan11
09-27-2010, 08:41 AM
Are you gonna run away if your predictions don't happen like that like the guys who made this thread?

http://orangemane.com/BB/showthread.php?t=93922

That is the fun part of this game. It was supposed to be the 49ers game where the Chiefs got thumped and brought back to Earth. I guess we will just have to keep moving those goal posts won't we.

If I turn out to be wrong, I'll admit it, no problem.

You didn't get that from me. I've been saying the 49ers were going to suck all offseason, I even took the Chiefs in the pick'em thing over them. I'd take Buffalo over the 49ers at this point...that tells you how highly I think of them.

Peoples Champ
09-27-2010, 08:42 AM
dude we started 6-0 last year and missed the playoffs, its still early.

ZachKC
09-27-2010, 08:43 AM
If I turn out to be wrong, I'll admit it, no problem.

You didn't get that from me. I've been saying the 49ers were going to suck all offseason, I even took the Chiefs in the pick'em thing over them. I'd take Buffalo over the 49ers at this point...that tells you how highly I think of them.

I am not making the Chiefs anymore then they are. However...the 49'ers defense is pretty damn good.

We have an up and down offense. But this Chiefs defense? Is absolutely for real. I am done just saying they are not ****ty. I think we have a damn fine defense on our hands here in KC. Line has improved and our CB Flowers is playing at a probowl level.

ZachKC
09-27-2010, 08:45 AM
dude we started 6-0 last year and missed the playoffs, its still early.

Yea, that was great stuff.

24champ
09-27-2010, 09:07 AM
http://www.gifsoup.com/view/95955/j5-charles-choke-o.gif


Gonna be the same ol' Chefs at the end of the year.

ZachKC
09-27-2010, 09:09 AM
http://www.gifsoup.com/view/95955/j5-charles-choke-o.gif


Gonna be the same ol' Chefs at the end of the year.

The Chiefs at the end of the year?

This is what the Chiefs looked like at the end of the year last year.

<object width="853" height="505"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/1d78VkTniiE?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US&amp;rel=0"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/1d78VkTniiE?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US&amp;rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="853" height="505"></embed></object>

24champ
09-27-2010, 09:14 AM
The Chiefs at the end of the year?

This is what the Chiefs looked like at the end of the year last year.


At the end of the season...you were worse than the Faiders. ROFL!

http://i1007.photobucket.com/albums/af192/24champs/Standings.jpg



Anyway, back to your premature ejaculation thread Cheffies. :wave:

400HZ
09-27-2010, 09:15 AM
I am not making the Chiefs anymore then they are. However...the 49'ers defense is pretty damn good.

We have an up and down offense. But this Chiefs defense? Is absolutely for real. I am done just saying they are not ****ty. I think we have a damn fine defense on our hands here in KC. Line has improved and our CB Flowers is playing at a probowl level.

The players definitely have a more aggressive mentality this year. I'd probably hold off on crowning their asses, though. They got the Chargers in a monsoon, and then Cleveland and San Francisco who will probably end up being the two worst offenses in the NFL this year.

I really like what KC did with their last draft. Old school football minds get so wrapped around axioms like "building the trenches" that they overlook stark truths like a lack of electrifying playmakers. Berry, McCluster, and Arenas were excellent selections for the Chiefs, even if two of them will probably never develop into everyday starters. The Chiefs' biggest problem the last few seasons is simply that they never made plays.

Bronco Rob
09-27-2010, 03:39 PM
chefs suck out loud..

Haven't won a playoff game since January of 1994

Haven't been to a Superbowl since January of 1970

Have won 3 playoff games in 40 years.

Truly a irrelevant franchise.



:~ohyah!:




:thumbs:

ZachKC
09-27-2010, 03:51 PM
chefs suck out loud..

Haven't won a playoff game since January of 1994

Haven't been to a Superbowl since January of 1970

Have won 3 playoff games in 40 years.

Truly a irrelevant franchise.



:~ohyah!:




:thumbs:

You realize each time you cut and past this it has a glaring grammatical error that an average school age kid could spot.

Sound the last sentence out loud...how does it sound?

Houshyamama
09-27-2010, 03:54 PM
http://www.inewscatcher.com/timages/eb3e1fc9ffa9f88a83a0d1c68416f29a.jpg

http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4129/4961698293_100bd5041a_o.jpg

Rulon Velvet Jones
09-27-2010, 03:56 PM
THE LITTLE MERMAID
----------------------

The complete script
Compiled by Corey Johanningmeier
Portions copyright (c)1989 by Walt Disney Co.

-----------------------------------------------------------

(An ocean. Birds are flying and porpoises are swimming happily.
From the fog a ship appears crashing through the waves)

Sailors: I'll tell you a tale of the bottomless blue
And it's hey to the starboard, heave ho
Look out, lad, a mermaid be waitin' for you
In mysterious fathoms below.
Eric: Isn't this great? The salty sea air, the wind blowing in your face . . .
a perfect day to be at sea!
Grimsby: (Leaning over side.) Oh yes . . . delightful . . . .
Sailor 1: A fine strong wind and a following sea. King Triton must be in a
friendly-type mood.
Eric: King Triton?
Sailor 2: Why, ruler of the merpeople, lad. Thought every good sailor knew
about him.
Grimsby: Merpeople! Eric, pay no attention to this nautical nonsense.
Sailor 2: But it ain't nonsense, it's the truth! I'm tellin' you, down in the
depths o' the ocean they live. (He gestures wildly, Fish in his hand flops
away and lands back in the ocean, relieved.)
Sailors: Heave. ho. Heave, ho. In mysterious fathoms below. (Fish sighs and
swims away.)

(Titles. Various fish swimming. Merpeople converge on a great undersea
palace, filling concert hall inside. Fanfare ensues.)

Seahorse: Ahem . . . His royal highness, King Triton! (Triton enters
dramatically to wild cheering.) And presenting the distinguished court
composer, Horatio Thelonious Ignatius Crustaceous Sebastian! (Sebastion
enters to mild applause.)
Triton: I'm really looking forward to this performance, Sebastian.
Sebastian: Oh, Your Majesty, this will be the finest concert I have ever con-
ducted. Your daughters - they will be spectacular!
Triton: Yes, and especially my little Ariel.
Sebastian: Yes, yes, she has the most beautiful voice. . . . [sotto] If only
she'd show up for rehearsals once in a while. . . . (He proceeds to podium
and begins to direct orchestra.)
Triton's daughters: Ah, we are the daughters of Triton.
Great father who loves us and named us well:
Aquata, Andrina, Arista, Atina, Adella, Allana.
And then there is the youngest in her musical debut,
Our seventh little sister, we're presenting her to you,
To sing a song Sebastian wrote, her voice is like a bell,
She's our sister, Ar-i . . .
(Shell opens to reveal that Ariel is absent.)
Triton: (Very angry.) Ariel!!

(Cut to Ariel looking at sunken ship.)

Flounder: (From distance.) Ariel, wait for me . . .
Ariel: Flounder, hurry up!
Flounder: (Catching up.) You know I can't swim that fast.
Ariel: There it is. Isn't it fantastic?
Flounder: Yeah . . . sure . . . it - it's great. Now let's get outta here.
Ariel: You're not getting cold fins now, are you?
Flounder: Who, me? No way. It's just, it, err . . . it looks - damp in there.
Yeah. And I think I may be coming down with something. Yeah, I got this
cough. (Flounder coughs unconvincingly)
Ariel: All right. I'm going inside. You can just stay here and - watch for
sharks. (She goes inside.)
Flounder: O.K. Yeah - you go. I'll stay and - what? Sharks! Ariel!
(He tries to fit through porthole.) Ariel . . . I can't . . . I mean-
Ariel help!
Ariel: (Laughs.) Oh, Flounder.
Flounder: (Wispering.)Ariel, do you really think there might be sharks around
here? (Shark passes outside.)
Ariel: Flounder, don't be such a guppy.
Flounder: I'm not a guppy. (Gets pulled through porthole.)This is great - I
mean, I really love this. Excitement, adventure, danger lurking around
every corn- YAAAAHHHHHHHH!! Ariel!! (He sees a skull, crashes into pillar
causing cave in, and swims frantically away, knocking over Ariel.)
Ariel: Oh, are you okay?
Flounder: Yeah sure, no problem, I'm okay . . .
Ariel: Shhh . . . (Seeing a fork.) Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Have you ever
seen anything so wonderful in your entire life?
Flounder: Wow, cool! But, err, what is it?
Ariel: I don't know. But I bet Scuttle will.
(Puts fork in bag. Skark swims by outside.)
Flounder: What was that? Did you hear something?
Ariel: (Distracted by pipe.) Hmm, I wonder what this one is?
Flounder: Ariel . .
Ariel: Flounder, will you relax. Nothing is going to happen.
Flounder: (Seeing Shark looming behind him.) AAHHHH!! Run!! Run!! We're
gonna die!! (Shark chases them all around. Ariel's bag is hung up. She
goes back for it. Shark almost gets them. They head for porthole.) Oh No!!
(They crash through and go round and round. Flounder gets knocked silly
but Ariel saves him and traps Shark) You big bully. THBBBTTTT . . .
(Shark snaps at him and he swims away.)
Ariel: (Laughing.) Flounder, you really are a guppy.
Flounder: I am not.

(On surface. Scuttle on his island humming and looking through his
telescope.)

Ariel: Scuttle!
Scuttle: (Looking through the telescope the wrong way, shouting.) Whoa!
Mermaid off the port bow! Ariel, how you doin' kid? (Lowers telescope to
reveal Ariel at wing's length.) Whoa, what a swim!
Ariel: Scuttle - look what we found.
Flounder: Yeah - we were in this sunken ship - it was really creepy.
Scuttle: Human stuff, huh? Hey, lemme see. (Picks up fork.) Look at this.
Wow - this is special - this is very, very unusual.
Ariel: What? What is it?
Scuttle: It's a dinglehopper! Humans use these little babies . . . to
straighten their hair out. See - just a little twirl here an' a yank
there and - voiolay! You got an aesthetically pleasing configuration
of hair that humans go nuts over!
Ariel: A dinglehopper!
Flounder: What about that one?
Scuttle: (Holding pipe) Ah - this I haven't seen in years. This is wonderful!
A banded, bulbous - snarfblat.
Ariel and Flounder: Oohhh.
Scuttle: Now, the snarfblat dates back to prehistorical times, when humans used
to sit around, and stare at each other all day. Got very boring. So, they
invented the snarfblat to make fine music. Allow me.
(Scuttle blows into the pipe; seaweed pops out the other end.)
Ariel: Music? Oh, the concert! Oh my gosh, my father's gonna kill me!
Flounder: The concert was today?
Scuttle: (Still contemplating pipe.) Maybe you could make a little planter
out of it or somethin'.
Ariel: Uh, I'm sorry, I've gotta go. Thank you Scuttle. (Waves.)
Scuttle: Anytime sweetie, anytime.

(Cut to Flotsam and Jetsam, then Ursula in background watching magic
projection of Ariel swimming.)

Ursula: Yeeeeeees, hurry home, princess. We wouldn't want to miss old daddy's
celebration, now, would we? Huh! Celebration indeed. Bah! In MY day, we
had fantastical feasts when I lived in the palace. And now, look at me -
wasted away to practically nothing - banished and exiled and practically
starving, while he and his flimsy fish-folk celebrate. Well, I'll give 'em
something to celebrate soon enough. Flotsam! Jetsam! I want you to keep an
extra close watch on this pretty little daughter of his. She may be the key
to Triton's undoing. . . .

(Fade to the palace throne room where Ariel is being admonished.)

Triton: I just don't know what we're going to do with you, young lady.
Ariel: Daddy, I'm sorry, I just forgot, I -
Triton: As a result of your careless behaviour -
Sebastian: Careless and reckless behaviour!
Triton: - the entire celebration was, er -
Sebastian: Well, it was ruined! That's all. Completely destroyed! This
concert was to be the pinnacle of my distinguished career. Now thanks to
you I am the laughing stock of the entire kingdom!
Flounder: But it wasn't her fault! Ah - well - first, ahh, this shark chased us
- yeah - yeah! And we tried to - but we couldn't - and - grrrrrrrrr - and -
and we - whoooaaaaaa - oh, and then we were safe. But then this seagull came,
and it was this is this, and that is that, and -
Triton: Seagull? What? Oh - you went up to the surface again, didn't you?
DIDN'T YOU?
Ariel: Nothing - happened. . . .
Triton: Oh, Ariel, How many times must we go through this? You could've been
seen by one of those barbarians - by - by one of those humans!
Ariel: Daddy, they're not barbarians!
Triton: They're dangerous. Do you think I want to see my youngest daughter
snared by some fish-eater's hook?
Ariel: I'm sixteen years old - I'm not a child anymore -
Triton: Don't you take that tone of voice with me young lady. As long as you
live under my ocean, you'll obey my rules!
Ariel: But if you would just listen -
Triton: Not another word - and I am never, NEVER to hear of you going to the
surface again. Is that clear? (Ariel leaves, crying.)
Sebastian: Hm! Teenagers. . . . They think they know everything. You give
them an inch, they swim all over you.
Triton: Do you, er, think I - I was too hard on her?
Sebastian: Definitely not. Why, if Ariel was my daughter, I'd show her who was
boss. None of this "flitting to the surface" and other such nonsense. No,
sir - I'd keep her under tight control.
Triton: You're absolutely right, Sebastian.
Sebastian: Of course.
Triton: Ariel needs constant supervision.
Sebastian: Constant.
Triton: Someone to watch over her - to keep her out of trouble.
Sebastian: All the time -
Triton: And YOU are just the crab to do it.

(Cut to Sebastion walking down corridor.)

Sebastian: How do I get myself into these situations? I should be writing
symphonies - not tagging along after some headstrong teenager. (Sees Ariel
and Flounder sneaking off and follows.) Hmm? What is that girl up to? (He
barely makes it into cave and sees Ariel's collection.) Huh?
Flounder: Ariel, are you okay?
Ariel: If only I could make him understand. I just don't see things the way he
does. I don't see how a world that makes such wonderful things - could be
bad.

Look at this stuff
Isn't it neat?
Wouldn't you think my collection's complete?
Wouldn't you think I'm the girl
The girl who has ev'rything?
Look at this trove
Treasures untold
How many wonders can one cavern hold?
Lookin' around here you'd think
Sure, she's got everything

I've got gadgets and gizmos aplenty
I've got whozits and whatzits galore
(You want thingamabobs?
I got twenty)
But who cares?
No big deal
I want more

I wanna be where the people are
I wanna see
Wanna see 'em dancin'
Walkin' around on those
(Whad'ya call 'em?) oh - feet
Flippin' your fins you don't get too far
Legs are required for jumpin', dancin'
Strollin' along down a
(What's that word again?) street

Up where they walk
Up where they run
Up where they stay all day in the sun
Wanderin' free
Wish I could be
Part of that world

What would I give
If I could live
Outta these waters?
What would I pay
To spend a day
Warm on the sand?
Betcha on land
They understand
Bet they don't reprimand their daughters
Bright young women
Sick o' swimmin'
Ready to stand

And ready to know what the people know
Ask 'em my questions
And get some answers
What's a fire and why does it
(What's the word?) burn?

When's it my turn?
Wouldn't I love
Love to explore that shore above?
Out of the sea
Wish I could be
Part of that world

(Sebastion has been struggling around and now comes crashing down making
a lot of noise.)
Ariel: Sebastion!?
Sebastian: Ariel - what, are you mad? How could you - what is all this?
Ariel: It, err, it's just my - collection. . . .
Sebastian: Oh. I see. Your collection. Hmmm. IF YOUR FATHER KNEW ABOUT THIS
PLACE HE'D -
Flounder: You're not gonna tell him, are you?
Ariel: Oh, please, Sebastian, he would never understand.
Sebastian: Ariel. You're under a lot of pressure down here. Come with me,
I'll take you home and get you something warm to drink. (A ship passes by
overhead.)
Ariel: What do you suppose?. . .
Sebastion: Ariel? Ariel!

(On surface. Fireworks in the sky around ship. Ariel looks on,
amazed. Sebastion and Flounder arrive.)

Sebastion: Ariel, what - what are you- jumpin' jellyfish! Ariel, Ariel!
Please come back! (Ariel swims to ship and watches party until Max finds
her.)
Eric: (Whistles.) Max, here boy. Hey, come on, mutt, whatcha doing, huh
Max? Good boy. (Ariel sees him and is stricken.)
Scuttle: Hey there, sweetie! Quite a show, eh?
Ariel: Scuttle, be quiet! They'll hear you.
Scuttle: Oooh, I gotcha, I gotcha. We're being intrepidatious. WE'RE OUT TO
DISCOVER! (Ariel grabs his beak.)
Ariel: I've never seen a human this close before. Oh - he's very handsome,
isn't he?
Scuttle: (Looking at Max) I dunno, he looks kinda hairy and slobbery to me.
Ariel: Not that one - the one playing the snarfblat.
Grimsby: Silence! Silence! It is now my honour and privilege to present our
esteemed Prince Eric with a very special, very expensive, very large birthday
present.
Eric: Ah, Grimsby - y'old beanpole, you shouldn't have.
Grimsby: I know. Happy birthday, Eric! (Large, gaudy statue of Eric is
revealed. Max growls.)
Eric: Gee, Grim. It's, err, it's, err - it's really somethin'. . . .
Grimsby: Yes, I commissioned it myself. Of course, I had hoped it would be a
wedding present, but . . .
Eric: Come on, Grim, don't start. Look, you're not still sore because I didn't
fall for the princess of Glauerhaven, are you?
Grimsby: Oh, Eric, it isn't me alone. The entire kingdom wants to see you
happily settled down with the right girl.
Eric: Well, she's out there somewhere. I just - I just haven't found her yet.
Grimsby: Well, perhaps you haven't been looking hard enough.
Eric: Believe me, Grim, when I find her I'll know - without a doubt. It'll
just - bam! - hit me - like lightning. (Lightning and thunder appear and the
sky grows dark.)
Sailor: Hurricane a'commin'!! Stand fast! Secure the riggin'! (Storm hits.)
Scuttle: Whoa! The wind's all of a sudden on the move here. (He is blown
away.) Oh! Ariel . . . (Ship crashes through storm. Lightning starts a fire.
A rock looms ahead.)
Eric: Look out! . . . (Ship crashes and all are thrown overboard except Max.)
Grim, hang on! (Sees Max.) Max! (Goes back to save him.) Jump Max! Come
on boy, jump! You can do it Max. (He saves Max but is trapped on board.)
Grimsby: ERIC! (Ship explodes. Ariel finds Eric near drowning and pulls him
away.)

(On beach. Ariel is sitting next to an unconscious Eric.)

Ariel: Is he - dead?
Scuttle: (Opens Eric's eyelid.) It's hard to say. (Puts his ear against Eric's
foot.) Oh, I - I can't make out a heartbeat.
Ariel: No, look! He's breathing. He's so, beautiful.

What would I give
To live where you are?
What would I pay
To stay here beside you?
What would I do to see you
Smiling at me?

Where would we walk?
Where would we run?
If we could stay all day in the sun?
Just you and me
And I could be
Part of your world

Houshyamama
09-27-2010, 03:57 PM
You realize each time you cut and past this it has a glaring grammatical error that an average school age kid could spot.

Sound the last sentence out loud...how does it sound?

A grammatically incorrect sentence is not necessarily factually incorrect, as evidenced in this case.

Keep up the photography by the way, it's much better than your team's relevant history.

ZachKC
09-27-2010, 04:08 PM
A grammatically incorrect sentence is not necessarily factually incorrect, as evidenced in this case.

Keep up the photography by the way, it's much better than your team's relevant history.
No, but it DOES make the poster look like a complete retard not capable of basic concepts of English when it is pasted over and over. I enjoy that part though.

You can count on Broncos fans to be much more interested in the football of yesterday than the football of today.

Rulon Velvet Jones
09-27-2010, 04:09 PM
http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4129/4961698293_100bd5041a_o.jpg
.

Mogulseeker
09-27-2010, 04:27 PM
The Raiders, Chargers and Donks are all chasing the Chiefs.

WE ARE YOUR MASTERS

http://i56.tinypic.com/2rrmmb8.jpg

Bob, please leave this forum. I'm about to block you again, but I really want to hear your response here. I know you're not used to people actually caring about what you have to say, but here we go.

Normal people make fun of people like you. Basically, you are the archetype of a loser... when my friends start acting like shut-ins, or p***Y out when I'm out meeting new friends/women, the response is always "c'mon, you don't want to become a 350lb gamer with a chronic masturbation problem who trolls the internet while eating cheetos on his chest."

23,000 posts, dude... 23,000 posts. Let's round that up to 25,000 posts, and say that's about 2 minutes a post... thats 834 hours of posting (doesn't include reading other posts.... at 1 hour a day, that's about 3 years of your life that you've spent posting ridiculous nonsense, talking to people that don't like you on the internet.

Sometimes I find myself in a group of people and find myself in the minority - for example if I'm out with some Chiefs fans... there might be a little bit of ribbing but that's okay because they are my friends. We are not your friends, Bob, and you are not welcome here.

For your sake, go out and find a girl with a fetish for 350lb mulletheads. ****... do something. Do some charity work. Go back to high school/get your GED. Travel. Post on a Chiefs message forum. Climb a mountain. Go camping.

Just leave.

Mogulseeker
09-27-2010, 04:30 PM
Oh, and Bob, please don't hurt yourself after reading my last post... you seem like the kind of person who would do that. One time a girl went home and cut herself after I said "And you're obviously not listening to Jenny Craig" after she said "You're not listening to me" in one of our class discussion groups.

I don't want it to happen, but It's called motivation. Sometimes people have to be mean.

Bob's your Information Minister
09-27-2010, 07:10 PM
Two minutes a post? I'm far swifter, my friend.

alchemize
09-27-2010, 08:24 PM
Bob, please leave this forum. I'm about to block you again, but I really want to hear your response here. I know you're not used to people actually caring about what you have to say, but here we go.

Normal people make fun of people like you. Basically, you are the archetype of a loser... when my friends start acting like shut-ins, or p***Y out when I'm out meeting new friends/women, the response is always "c'mon, you don't want to become a 350lb gamer with a chronic masturbation problem who trolls the internet while eating cheetos on his chest."

23,000 posts, dude... 23,000 posts. Let's round that up to 25,000 posts, and say that's about 2 minutes a post... thats 834 hours of posting (doesn't include reading other posts.... at 1 hour a day, that's about 3 years of your life that you've spent posting ridiculous nonsense, talking to people that don't like you on the internet.

Sometimes I find myself in a group of people and find myself in the minority - for example if I'm out with some Chiefs fans... there might be a little bit of ribbing but that's okay because they are my friends. We are not your friends, Bob, and you are not welcome here.

For your sake, go out and find a girl with a fetish for 350lb mulletheads. ****... do something. Do some charity work. Go back to high school/get your GED. Travel. Post on a Chiefs message forum. Climb a mountain. Go camping.

Just leave.I rarely post on here, but read it often. This is in my top 10 posts ever...

Of course, Bob isn't unique to the mane. There are strange people on the internet who get off on antagonizing others & being hated...some bizarre human condition that we discovered with the invention of the internet. The epitome of the internet troll.

loborugger
09-27-2010, 09:12 PM
Bob, please leave this forum. I'm about to block you again, but I really want to hear your response here. I know you're not used to people actually caring about what you have to say, but here we go.

Normal people make fun of people like you. Basically, you are the archetype of a loser... when my friends start acting like shut-ins, or p***Y out when I'm out meeting new friends/women, the response is always "c'mon, you don't want to become a 350lb gamer with a chronic masturbation problem who trolls the internet while eating cheetos on his chest."

23,000 posts, dude... 23,000 posts. Let's round that up to 25,000 posts, and say that's about 2 minutes a post... thats 834 hours of posting (doesn't include reading other posts.... at 1 hour a day, that's about 3 years of your life that you've spent posting ridiculous nonsense, talking to people that don't like you on the internet.

Sometimes I find myself in a group of people and find myself in the minority - for example if I'm out with some Chiefs fans... there might be a little bit of ribbing but that's okay because they are my friends. We are not your friends, Bob, and you are not welcome here.

For your sake, go out and find a girl with a fetish for 350lb mulletheads. ****... do something. Do some charity work. Go back to high school/get your GED. Travel. Post on a Chiefs message forum. Climb a mountain. Go camping.

Just leave.

Rep! This is the best.

What you are missing is that our little cheeto munching, Mountain Dew swilling, Oedipus-like troglodyte is also maniac depressive. He's up, he's down... and give the devil his due, the boy is wayyyy up. So expect more, and not less of his tripe on here for the foreseeable future. And its fine. Soon, when his team plummets back to the earth, he will be flat on his face - much like a sugar or heroin junkie crashing from a high. It's as predictable as they come.

Bob's your Information Minister
09-27-2010, 09:36 PM
That's "manic" depressive, you ignoramus.

****in' retard.

loborugger
09-27-2010, 09:44 PM
That's "manic" depressive, you ignoramus.

****in' retard.

<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/4Kf-h3PMupk?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/4Kf-h3PMupk?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>

You got me on the spelling, my man. So, I take it you are familiar with it? ROFL!

Jetmeck
09-27-2010, 09:57 PM
Here come the Chief TARDS, was so nice and quiet last couple of years ?

Bronco Rob
09-28-2010, 03:13 AM
Here come the Chief TARDS, was so nice and quiet last couple of years ?



When you only win 10 games in 3 seasons you tend to be quiet.



Ha!

Mogulseeker
09-28-2010, 06:20 AM
You realize each time you cut and past this it has a glaring grammatical error that an average school age kid could spot.

Sound the last sentence out loud...how does it sound?

Can you spot the grammatical errors in ZachKC's post? I can spot them.

There are 5: failure of the use of an auxiliary verb, misspelled word (or improper placement of a preposition depending on how you look at it), missing comma, improper use of an ellipse, sentence fragment.

Ray Finkle
09-28-2010, 06:23 AM
The Raiders, Chargers and Donks are all chasing the Chiefs.

WE ARE YOUR MASTERS

http://i56.tinypic.com/2rrmmb8.jpg

Boob,
answer this. What happens to offensives that are older at key spots (center/guard/RB) in the later stages of the year? They begin to deteriorate....

ZachKC
09-28-2010, 07:42 AM
Boob,
answer this. What happens to offensives that are older at key spots (center/guard/RB) in the later stages of the year? They begin to deteriorate....

We are old at RB?

Ray Finkle
09-28-2010, 07:42 AM
We are old at RB?

Thomas Jones....the bigger issue is Casey at Center....He is playing very good right (as he did last year) but fell apart in the second half.

ZachKC
09-28-2010, 08:01 AM
Are you trying to convince me that Thomas Jones who got 1,400 rushing yards last year won't be able to split carries with Charles?

KCStud
09-28-2010, 11:02 AM
Chiefs fans (except Bob) are not making KC out to be a Super Bowl contender. We are just excited about the 3-0 start just like any other team would be. So people thinking we are beating our chests are wrong.

Ray Finkle
09-28-2010, 11:14 AM
Are you trying to convince me that Thomas Jones who got 1,400 rushing yards last year won't be able to split carries with Charles?

nope....I am simply saying he will not be as effective late in the season. Look at the stats last year with the Jets (December/January).

Mediator12
09-28-2010, 11:18 AM
Enjoy this Chiefs fans. Remember, DEN started out 6-0 last year and then everyone figured out what the new Regime was doing differently. Especially, defensively. Your team has a lot of holes the DC has covered up and your ST's have been flat out outstanding. However, those things will catch up to you sooner or later.

However, kudos on the solid start ;D

Rabb
09-28-2010, 11:18 AM
Chiefs fans (except Bob) are not making KC out to be a Super Bowl contender. We are just excited about the 3-0 start just like any other team would be. So people thinking we are beating our chests are wrong.

the way seasons go in our division, it is so hard to be overly excited about a streak one way or another

San Diego starts off bad, we start off well, etc.

That One Guy
09-28-2010, 02:49 PM
Chiefs fans (except Bob) are not making KC out to be a Super Bowl contender. We are just excited about the 3-0 start just like any other team would be. So people thinking we are beating our chests are wrong.

It could be the big glowing idiot that made a "MASTERS of the division" thread on an opposing team's board after 3 weeks that gave that impression.

Mogulseeker
09-29-2010, 06:25 AM
I rarely post on here, but read it often. This is in my top 10 posts ever...

Of course, Bob isn't unique to the mane. There are strange people on the internet who get off on antagonizing others & being hated...some bizarre human condition that we discovered with the invention of the internet. The epitome of the internet troll.

If that was the case, then he's probably still jacking off to that post.

Peoples Champ
09-29-2010, 06:59 AM
It could be the big glowing idiot that made a "MASTERS of the division" thread on an opposing team's board after 3 weeks that gave that impression.



Good point, this thread is definately beating the chest.

KCStud
09-29-2010, 12:06 PM
Chiefs fans (except Bob) are not making KC out to be a Super Bowl contender. We are just excited about the 3-0 start just like any other team would be. So people thinking we are beating our chests are wrong.

Try reading that again folks. Btw-Chiefs fans don't claim Bob. He thought our draft was terrible this year...

Ray Finkle
09-29-2010, 12:23 PM
Chiefs fans (except Bob) are not making KC out to be a Super Bowl contender. We are just excited about the 3-0 start just like any other team would be. So people thinking we are beating our chests are wrong.

Try reading that again folks. Btw-Chiefs fans don't claim Bob. He thought our draft was terrible this year...

oh Bobo is all yours....

Rausch 2.0
09-29-2010, 12:28 PM
Chiefs fans (except Bob) are not making KC out to be a Super Bowl contender. We are just excited about the 3-0 start just like any other team would be. So people thinking we are beating our chests are wrong.

Whatever.

We win 6 games this year and I'll be ****ed-drunk-ecstatic!

Likely way beyond april...ugh!~

KCStud
09-29-2010, 01:04 PM
oh Bobo is all yours....

So since Clayton is chest pumping, that certainly has to mean that every Chiefs fan is?

That One Guy
09-29-2010, 01:23 PM
So since Clayton is chest pumping, that certainly has to mean that every Chiefs fan is?

He is your leader. So... yes.

Peoples Champ
09-29-2010, 01:58 PM
So since Clayton is chest pumping, that certainly has to mean that every Chiefs fan is?


on this blog or board, yes, on a chiefs board, no

ColoradoBuff
09-29-2010, 02:00 PM
You're damn right, Steve. This is fap worthy.

http://i53.tinypic.com/zvodhu.gif

poor twiggy is gonna get knocked out sooner or later.....little frail thing! enjoy it while it lasts!

Bob's your Information Minister
09-29-2010, 02:23 PM
Marvin Harrison was just as frail.

We hit gold with McCluster. I can't wait to see Brian Dawkins attempt to tackle him.

vancejohnson82
09-29-2010, 02:44 PM
Marvin Harrison was just as frail.

We hit gold with McCluster. I can't wait to see Brian Dawkins attempt to tackle him.

I kinda remember this hype about someone else on the Queefs....

what was his name????

Dwayne Bowe??

ZachKC
09-29-2010, 02:48 PM
2nd in scoring defense.

Love it.

Rulon Velvet Jones
09-29-2010, 03:36 PM
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Rulon Velvet Jones
09-29-2010, 03:39 PM
http://lolzing.com/HotlinkingOK/Swing_jump.gif
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KCStud
09-29-2010, 05:03 PM
on this blog or board, yes, on a chiefs board, no

Well keep on mind that Bob does not represent us all.

Bob's your Information Minister
09-29-2010, 05:09 PM
I kinda remember this hype about someone else on the Queefs....

what was his name????

Dwayne Bowe??

He scored a 45-yard touchdown last week.

Pretty dad gum awesome.

vancejohnson82
09-29-2010, 05:30 PM
He scored a 45-yard touchdown last week.

Pretty dad gum awesome.

yea....those 7 receptions through 3 games is pretty unreal

Bob's your Information Minister
09-29-2010, 07:19 PM
Bowe is a proven player with two 1,000-yard seasons under his belt. If the best you can do is crow about three games, you're pathetic. Try again.

By the way, 3-0. Stats are for losers.

That One Guy
09-29-2010, 07:32 PM
Bowe is a proven player with two 1,000-yard seasons under his belt. If the best you can do is crow about three games, you're pathetic. Try again.

By the way, 3-0. Stats are for losers.

Two rings in the last 15 years. Victorious three game stretches not taking place in the playoffs are for losers.

KCStud
09-29-2010, 07:40 PM
Two rings in the last 15 years. Victorious three game stretches not taking place in the playoffs are for losers.

Dude clinging to SB's that were won under a different regime, different QB, and over a decade ago is pretty weak considering the Broncos and Chiefs have been embarrassing in the playoffs since 2000.

vancejohnson82
09-29-2010, 08:07 PM
Dude clinging to SB's that were won under a different regime, different QB, and over a decade ago is pretty weak considering the Broncos and Chiefs have been embarrassing in the playoffs since 2000.

dont group yourselves in that statement...

your bums have been pathetic come January since the early 90s

Obushma
09-29-2010, 08:08 PM
May the next man or woman who bumps this tread, catch the worst case of syphilis infected venereal warts, and so it is said, let it be, amen.

Lev Vyvanse
09-29-2010, 08:13 PM
http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d23/Malgamate/leodancestrut.gif
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Cool gif.

Lev Vyvanse
09-29-2010, 08:16 PM
http://lolzing.com/HotlinkingOK/Swing_jump.gif
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I like this gif also.

Lev Vyvanse
09-29-2010, 08:20 PM
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KCStud
09-29-2010, 11:51 PM
dont group yourselves in that statement...

your bums have been pathetic come January since the early 90s

And what does that have to do with this year? Just because of a success with a different regime and GM we are still going to suck in the playoffs? Well if that's the case then I guess we can think that about the Broncos will suck in the playoffs too considering your lack of success in the postseason over the past decade.

Bob's your Information Minister
09-30-2010, 12:06 AM
And what does that have to do with this year? Just because of a success with a different regime and GM we are still going to suck in the playoffs? Well if that's the case then I guess we can think that about the Broncos will suck in the playoffs too considering your lack of success in the postseason over the past decade.

Dude, don't get wrapped up into these petty historical debates with these clowns. That's all they have to lean on because right now they are scared ****less the Chiefs are going to win the division this year while they flounder around with Kyle Orton with TEBOW of all people waiting in the wings to take over when he undoubtedly gets kicked out of town.

Bronco Rob
09-30-2010, 03:59 AM
And what does that have to do with this year? Just because of a success with a different regime and GM we are still going to suck in the playoffs? Well if that's the case then I guess we can think that about the Broncos will suck in the playoffs too considering your lack of success in the postseason over the past decade.


The Kansas City Chefs last playoff victory:

JANUARY 16TH 1994

get it?

got it?

good.


;)

ZachKC
09-30-2010, 07:37 AM
May the next man or woman who bumps this tread, catch the worst case of syphilis infected venereal warts, and so it is said, let it be, amen.

Your own posters love trolling your own board. Ha!Ha!

Rulon Velvet Jones
09-30-2010, 07:38 AM
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And what are you going to do about it, Zach?

ZachKC
09-30-2010, 07:49 AM
And what are you going to do about it, Zach?

Encourage it.

You are trolling your own board.

Why wouldn't I think that is hilarity?

cutthemdown
09-30-2010, 07:53 AM
Dude, don't get wrapped up into these petty historical debates with these clowns. That's all they have to lean on because right now they are scared ****less the Chiefs are going to win the division this year while they flounder around with Kyle Orton with TEBOW of all people waiting in the wings to take over when he undoubtedly gets kicked out of town.

It's not Ortons fault. Chiefs are a lot better no one is arguing that. But no way Cassal can get it done in a big game. Also none of the teams you have beat are really having good years.

cutthemdown
09-30-2010, 07:56 AM
LOL The combined win loss of Queef opponents? 1-7. 2 of the teams they beat yet to even get a stinking win?

Chiefs will get there asses handed to them soon enough. All we have to do is wait.

ZachKC
09-30-2010, 07:57 AM
LOL The combined win loss of Queef opponents? 1-7. 2 of the teams they beat yet to even get a stinking win?

Chiefs will get there asses handed to them soon enough. All we have to do is wait.

...and rationalize.

crawdad
09-30-2010, 12:30 PM
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

missingnumber7
09-30-2010, 01:55 PM
Bowe is a proven player with two 1,000-yard seasons under his belt. If the best you can do is crow about three games, you're pathetic. Try again.

By the way, 3-0. Stats are for losers.

Ummm...Bowe has only had 1 1000 yard season...and he barely got 1000 that year.


And by the way talk to us when you are 6-0.

ZachKC
09-30-2010, 02:02 PM
Ummm...Bowe has only had 1 1000 yard season...and he barely got 1000 that year.


And by the way talk to us when you are 6-0.

Meh, we probably won't be 6-0. Not to worry though. That doesn't mean this won't be a good team that can get better against the season progresses. Hell...the worst case scenario until week 7 is that we are at the top of the division. That is hilarity.

missingnumber7
09-30-2010, 02:17 PM
Meh, we probably won't be 6-0. Not to worry though. That doesn't mean this won't be a good team that can get better against the season progresses. Hell...the worst case scenario until week 7 is that we are at the top of the division. That is hilarity.

I just hope they don't carry this out to long...the suicide hotlines won't be able to handle it in KC.

ZachKC
09-30-2010, 02:19 PM
I just hope they don't carry this out to long...the suicide hotlines won't be able to handle it in KC.

Yea, we were not able to flood the lines with "omg we lost to one of the weakest teams in the league who can barely can anyone to watch them"

ZachKC
09-30-2010, 02:20 PM
Yea, we were not able to flood the lines with "omg we lost to one of the weakest teams in the league who can barely can anyone to watch them"

But....HEY ITS HOT OUT THERE /orangemane rationalization

KCStud
09-30-2010, 02:30 PM
The Kansas City Chefs last playoff victory:

JANUARY 16TH 1994

get it?

got it?

good.


;)

Broncos 1 playoffs win and a handful of beatings in the playoffs the last decade. That sound familiar?

DAN_BRONCO_FAN
09-30-2010, 03:45 PM
well enjoy it while ya can i dont see the candy city chefs goin ne where next to the playoffs perhaps u can get to 7-9 or 8-8 then have a big parade to celebrate

Mogulseeker
09-30-2010, 03:51 PM
2nd in scoring defense.

Love it.

Kinda like the Broncos start last year.

ZachKC
09-30-2010, 03:55 PM
well enjoy it while ya can i dont see the candy city chefs goin ne where next to the playoffs perhaps u can get to 7-9 or 8-8 then have a big parade to celebrate

@ Indianapolis Colts
@ Houston Texans
vs Jacksonville Jaguars
vs Buffalo Bills
@ Oakland Raiders
@ Denver Broncos
vs Arizona Cardinals
@ Seattle Seahawks
vs Denver Broncos
@ San Diego Chargers
@ St. Louis Rams
vs Tennessee Titans
vs Oakland Raiders

ZachKC
09-30-2010, 03:55 PM
Kinda like the Broncos start last year.

We have an experienced coaching staff. You guys wouldn't know anything about that.

DAN_BRONCO_FAN
09-30-2010, 06:51 PM
colts = bad loss eeee good luck with em san diego is gonna win the division ya kno they start bad finish great all the time

tsiguy96
09-30-2010, 06:52 PM
chiefs opponents record: 1-8.

next.

ZachKC
10-01-2010, 07:29 AM
chiefs opponents record: 1-8.

next.

And if we lost those games they would be 4-5!

But thanks for being around so that the Jags can have a win under their belt.

Mediator12
10-01-2010, 08:33 AM
We have an experienced coaching staff. You guys wouldn't know anything about that.

That should help you for the first four games, after that you better hope you have a real team that can execute when teams figure out your weaknesses.

Right now, congrats on the good start. Because that is all it is. A good start.

sixtimeseight
10-01-2010, 03:24 PM
And if we lost those games they would be 4-5!

But thanks for being around so that the Jags can have a win under their belt.

And thank you for being around to remind me to go to the gym so I don't turn into a giant fatass like you.

ZachKC
10-01-2010, 03:38 PM
And thank you for being around to remind me to go to the gym so I don't turn into a giant fatass like you.

Hi!

DAN_BRONCO_FAN
10-01-2010, 03:55 PM
everyone knows how this is going to turn out.
San Diego will start off slow ,then they will toward the end of the season pick up steam either get in or almost get in the playoffs lose to Pittsburgh indy or New England or some other team that make cameo appearance in the playoffs
kc or denver will most likely lock in the 2nd or 3rd place spot in the division with the faders holding on to their favorite spot in the division 4th last place but hey your kc not the raiders so as long as our unfav team is stuck on the bottom . :)

sixtimeseight
10-01-2010, 04:13 PM
Hi!

Off to the gym!

Broncos_OTM
10-01-2010, 04:18 PM
Can't you all see Zach is trolling first time that they have been able to in a long ass time. I'm confident they are a glass tiger. Improved yes. Dominant no. They need sun on their pasty skin. They have been hiding long enough.

Lev Vyvanse
10-01-2010, 04:20 PM
http://jitkahynkova.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/print_final.jpg


mod note: IMG tags removed because picture was enormous.

Broncos_OTM
10-01-2010, 04:22 PM
Really why in the **** would you troll another teams fan board. No life. And I don't just mean you kc chefs fans all trolls. Really your are that pitiful

ZachKC
10-03-2010, 04:32 PM
Really why in the **** would you troll another teams fan board. No life. And I don't just mean you kc chefs fans all trolls. Really your are that pitiful

Drrr

Bob's your Information Minister
10-03-2010, 04:33 PM
I just checked and we're still in first place.

Bob's your Information Minister
10-03-2010, 08:33 PM
Now we're MASTERS of the entire NFL.

The entire NFL is looking up at the Kansas City Chiefs this week.

http://cdn1.sbnation.com/imported_assets/558563/xlc8ro.jpg

Malcontent
10-03-2010, 08:36 PM
I like watermelon in the summertime...

Sassy
10-03-2010, 08:37 PM
Ha! Ha! Ha!

Sassy
10-03-2010, 08:38 PM
I like watermelon in the summertime...

Hot chocolate or apple cider with cinnamon schnapps in the winter rocks.:sunshine:

TDmvp
10-03-2010, 08:38 PM
http://www.sfusualsuspects.com/wp-content/uploads/1264693242cartoon_sun_st6.gif

http://bocktherobber.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/dog-ass-jesus.jpg

Well it was bound to happen sooner or later ... But we finally have proof the sun even shines on a dogs $#@ from time to time..

L.A. BRONCOS FAN
10-03-2010, 08:43 PM
Gotta let Boob and the rest of Mullet Land celebrate.

After all, this is probably the closest their chorfs will ever come to accomplishing anything significant in this league. Ha!

Steve Sewell
10-03-2010, 08:57 PM
Now we're MASTERS of the entire NFL.

The entire NFL is looking up at the Kansas City Chiefs this week.

http://cdn1.sbnation.com/imported_assets/558563/xlc8ro.jpg

You know you have something special brewing when you get Bronson Pinchot to start cheering for your team.

TDmvp
10-03-2010, 09:00 PM
You know you have something special brewing when you get Bronson Pinchot to start cheering for your team.

no doubt...

And now we do the dance for joy...
http://www.gifsoup.com/webroot/animatedgifs/139684_o.gif

Bob's your Information Minister
10-11-2010, 03:14 PM
It's good to be the king.

oubronco
10-11-2010, 04:54 PM
http://img832.imageshack.us/img832/1407/thisthreadsucks.jpg (http://img832.imageshack.us/i/thisthreadsucks.jpg/)

Mediator12
10-12-2010, 06:15 AM
It's good to be the king.

King, please!

King is a lifelong deal, the chiefs are more like bad stewards. You know like the film version of Denethor in LOTR: The Return of the King. Enjoy your time on top. The return of the King is imminent ;D

I can not wait for KC to jump of the top of the citadel all burning......