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Mogulseeker
05-30-2010, 04:17 PM
So Arthur Guinness, Pete Coors, Tom Long (Miller), and Dave Peacock (Anheuser-Busch) walk into a bar.

Peacock orders first, "I'll have a Bud Light - the taste that wont fill me up and never lets me down," he says.

Long orders next, "I want the High Life, give me a Miller."

Coors orders next, "I want a taste as cold as the Rockies, give me a Coors Light."

Finally, Guinness orders, "Well, as long as you guys aren't drinking beer... I think I'll just have a coke."

Mogulseeker
05-30-2010, 04:19 PM
A rabbi and a priest get into a car accident and it's a bad one. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly, neither are hurt. They crawl out of their cars and the rabbi sees the priest's collar and says, "So you're a priest. I'm a rabbi. Just look at our cars. There's nothing left but we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God. God must have meant that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace the rest of our days." And the priest said, "I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God."

And the rabbi said, "and look at this. Here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of Mogen David wine didn't break, surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune. And so he handed the bottle to the priest. The priest said he agreed, took a few big swigs, and handed the bottle back to the rabbi. The rabbi took the bottle, didn't drink at all, put the cap on, and handed it back to the priest. The priest asked, "aren't you going to have any?" And the rabbi replied, "No . . . I think I'll just wait for the police."

houghtam
05-30-2010, 04:21 PM
Guinness may be better than the other three, but that's like comparing apples to rocket ships.

Overall, Guinness is a pretentious beer for pretentious people. It's not the same in America as it is overseas (like most beers), and I've found in my vast experience that people who say Guinness is the best haven't tried anything else.

Nickel's worth of free advice: try something else. Anything.

Mogulseeker
05-30-2010, 04:23 PM
Fat Tire... Odell... Wynkoop

misturanderson
05-30-2010, 04:25 PM
Guinness may be better than the other three, but that's like comparing apples to rocket ships.

Overall, Guinness is a pretentious beer for pretentious people. It's not the same in America as it is overseas (like most beers), and I've found in my vast experience that people who say Guinness is the best haven't tried anything else.

Nickel's worth of free advice: try something else. Anything.

Way to completely miss the point of the thread.

Dagmar
05-30-2010, 04:40 PM
Way to completely miss the point of the thread.

**** jokes?

Miss I.
05-30-2010, 04:46 PM
1. A Voice in the Darkness
The Seven Dwarfs were marching through the forest one day they fell in a deep, dark ravine. Snow White, who was following along, peered over the edge of the steep chasm and called out to the fallen dwarfs. From the depths of the dark hole a voice returned, "The Raiders are Super Bowl contenders."
Snow White thought to herself, "Thank God... at least Dopey's survived!"

2. It's a Wonder (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wonderlic_Test#Use_in_NFL)
Why do Chief's players keep their Wonderlic results on their dash boards?
So they can park in the handicap spaces.

3. Kissin' Cousins
What do you get when you put the girlfriends of a dozen Chief's fans in one room?
A full set of teeth! (though I think this is a false question as I don't think girlfriends of Chief's fans exist)

4. Grounded
Why did the Chargers players miss their flight for the big game?
They were stuck on a broken escalator!

5. Hit and Run
If you see a Raider's fan on a bike, why should you not swerve to hit him?
It could be your bike



6. On the Bright Side
What do you call a Chief's fan with half a brain?
Gifted!

7. Playing Possum
Why are the Chief's like a possum?
Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.

8. Licking the Problem
What did the average Charger player get on his Wonderlic test?
Drool!

and one about beer...

What's the similarity between American beer and having sex in a canoe?
****ing close to water.

theAPAOps5
05-30-2010, 04:51 PM
and Tebow........

Man Tebow just makes everything better even punchlines!

:)

SoCalBronco
05-30-2010, 04:52 PM
This thread will be here all week.

The Joker
05-30-2010, 04:54 PM
Overall, Guinness is a pretentious beer for pretentious people.

What a pretentious thing to say.

Maybe some people just, ya know, like the taste of Guinness better?

broncogary
05-30-2010, 04:55 PM
1. A Voice in the Darkness
The Seven Dwarfs were marching through the forest one day they fell in a deep, dark ravine. Snow White, who was following along, peered over the edge of the steep chasm and called out to the fallen dwarfs. From the depths of the dark hole a voice returned, "The Raiders are Super Bowl contenders."
Snow White thought to herself, "Thank God... at least Dopey's survived!"

2. It's a Wonder (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wonderlic_Test#Use_in_NFL)
Why do Chief's players keep their Wonderlic results on their dash boards?
So they can park in the handicap spaces.

3. Kissin' Cousins
What do you get when you put the girlfriends of a dozen Chief's fans in one room?
A full set of teeth! (though I think this is a false question as I don't think girlfriends of Chief's fans exist)

4. Grounded
Why did the Chargers players miss their flight for the big game?
They were stuck on a broken escalator!

5. Hit and Run
If you see a Raider's fan on a bike, why should you not swerve to hit him?
It could be your bike



6. On the Bright Side
What do you call a Chief's fan with half a brain?
Gifted!

7. Playing Possum
Why are the Chief's like a possum?
Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.

8. Licking the Problem
What did the average Charger player get on his Wonderlic test?
Drool!

and one about beer...

What's the similarity between American beer and having sex in a canoe?
****ing close to water.

I like it, and it doesn't discriminate. ;D

TheElusiveKyleOrton
05-30-2010, 04:57 PM
This thread will be here all week.

This thread would like you to try the veal, and make sure to tip your waitstaff.

DenverBrit
05-30-2010, 05:09 PM
Bob, a handsome dude, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 pm. He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV.

The 10 pm news was coming on. The news crew was covering the story of a man on the ledge of a large building preparing to jump.

The blonde looked at Bob and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"

Bob said, "You know, I bet he'll jump."

The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."

Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!"

Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.

The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her $20 to Bob, saying, "Fair's fair. Here's your money."

Bob replied, "I can't take your money. I saw this earlier on the 5 pm news, and so I knew he would jump."

The blonde replied, "I did too, but didn't think he'd do it again."

Bob took the money.

DenverBrit
05-30-2010, 05:13 PM
Guinness may be better than the other three, but that's like comparing apples to rocket ships.

Overall, Guinness is a pretentious beer for pretentious people. It's not the same in America as it is overseas (like most beers), and I've found in my vast experience that people who say Guinness is the best haven't tried anything else.

Nickel's worth of free advice: try something else. Anything.

Interesting, but incomprehensible mixed metaphor.

Guinness is a Stout and the very nectar of the working man in Ireland and a favorite drink for millions. Hardly 'pretentious.'

So in your 'vast experience' what is an unpretentious beer?

Miss I.
05-30-2010, 05:29 PM
Beer Good. All Beer Good. some Beer just gooder than others. ;D

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loborugger
05-30-2010, 06:22 PM
This thread will be here all week.

Dont forget to tip your waitress!

Dr. Broncenstein
05-30-2010, 07:34 PM
I remember when I had my first beer too.

Broncojef
05-30-2010, 07:52 PM
Q: How many men does it take to open a bottle of beer? A: None. It should already be opened by the time the woman brings it.

Yesterday scientists in the USA revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory they fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them lost all sense of reasoning, started talking nonsense, and couldn"t drive.

ZONA
05-30-2010, 11:08 PM
"John McCain of Arizona is facing a tough re-election campaign. The key issue is illegal immigration. I don't want to say McCain is old, but in his first election, the illegal immigrants were white people." óJay Leno

TheElusiveKyleOrton
05-30-2010, 11:14 PM
"John McCain of Arizona is facing a tough re-election campaign. The key issue is illegal immigration. I don't want to say McCain is old, but in his first election, the illegal immigrants were white people." óJay Leno

http://www.guitarsandaudio.com/extras/****e/Ba_ZING.gif

Meck77
05-30-2010, 11:17 PM
I once served Peter Coors a beer as a caterer back in the day. He actually asked for a warm one. True story.

Dr.5280
05-30-2010, 11:18 PM
Czech beer rules! Go to any bar: Coke 2$. Bottled water 1$. Beer is fifty cents. Tastes like fresh-baked bread.

Mogulseeker
05-30-2010, 11:20 PM
I once served Peter Coors a beer as a caterer back in the day. He actually asked for a warm one. True story.

Coors is a fellow Pioneer alum. He's on the board of directors at my school. The fitness center on campus is the "Pete Coors Center for Health and Wellness."

TheReverend
05-30-2010, 11:50 PM
Coors is a fellow Pioneer alum. He's on the board of directors at my school. The fitness center on campus is the "Pete Coors Center for Health and Wellness."

http://images.yuku.com/image/jpeg/ad935ab542aea30da8a9376c63ee461a333b8ed.jpg

ZONA
05-30-2010, 11:57 PM
I once served Peter Coors a beer as a caterer back in the day. He actually asked for a warm one. True story.

Are you sure he was refering to beer? Maybe he just thought you were cute. :rofl:

houghtam
05-31-2010, 12:42 AM
Are you sure he was refering to beer? Maybe he just thought you were cute. :rofl:

lol

Non-pretentious beers:

Franziskaner
Hoegaarden (sp)
Paulaner

Guinness (in America) is something you find people drinking because they want to be "cool". Nevermind the fact that the American version tastes like a rump roast basted in coffee.

And no, I didn't miss the point of the thread. When I posted, it was one joke about how Guiness was better than three other equally disappointing beers. In the spirit of the thread, however, I will add my own joke.



Guy walks in to a bar, throws down a $50, says "Drinks all around, the call me Mr. Lucky!" Bartender asks, "Why do they call you Mr. Lucky, Mr. Lucky?" Guy says, "Hear about that car accident on the highway? 10 die, one man walks away alive? That's me. Mr. Lucky." Bartender says, "Well that sounds pretty lucky, Mr. Lucky...here's a shot on the house." Guy disappears, and no one hears from him, UNTIL...

6 months later, same guy walks in to a bar, throws down a $100, says "Drinks all around, the call me Mr. Lucky Lucky!" Bartender asks, "Why do they call you Mr. Lucky Lucky, Mr. Lucky Lucky?" Guy says, "Hear about that train derailment bout a week ago? 50 die, one man walks away alive? That's me. Mr. Lucky Lucky." Bartender says, "Well that sounds pretty lucky lucky, Mr. Lucky Lucky...here's two shots on the house." Guy disappears, and no one hears from him, UNTIL...

A year later, same guy walks in to a bar, throws down $500, says "Drinks all around, the call me Mr. Lucky Lucky Lucky!" Bartender asks, "Why do they call you Mr. Lucky Lucky Lucky, Mr. Lucky Lucky Lucky?" Guy says, "Hear about that plane crash bout a month ago? 200 die, one man walks away alive? That's me. Mr. Lucky Lucky Lucky." Bartender says, "Well that sounds pretty lucky lucky lucky, Mr. Lucky Lucky Lucky...here's three shots on the house." Guy disappears, and no one hears from him, UNTIL...

Two years later, same guy walks in to a bar, throws down $1000, says "Drinks all around, the call me Mr. Lucky Lucky Lucky Lucky!" Bartender asks, "Why do they call you Mr. Lucky Lucky Lucky Lucky, Mr. Lucky Lucky Lucky Lucky?" Guy says, "Well, I went over to my girlfriend's house the other day, and wanted to get a little somethin somethin... So we go to her bedroom, things start getting interesting, next thing you know, we're having sex. Little did we know though, her husband was under the bed with a 12 gauge. He pulls the trigger and blows my balls off." Bartender pauses a moment, then replies, "Well...that doesn't sound too lucky, Mr. Lucky Lucky Lucky Lucky." Guy responds, "True, but if it had been about a minute earlier, he woulda shot me right between the eyes."

BFDD
05-31-2010, 01:29 AM
lol

Non-pretentious beers:

Franziskaner
Hoegaarden (sp)
Paulaner

Guinness (in America) is something you find people drinking because they want to be "cool". Nevermind the fact that the American version tastes like a rump roast basted in coffee.



Beer certainly is a matter of preference. If people want to have adjunct filled beer like coors, then that is what their flavor profile or palate wants.

Though Franziskaner is a weissbier, Hoegaarden is a wheat and Paulaner makes a variety (Including a great pils) Augustiner brau and Jever are the best examples of amazing German Style pils.

Now that Guinness is brewed in Canada, there isn't much difference between American (nitro tapped) and Irish tapped Guinness. The funny thing is, Guinness only has 120 calories and has less alcohol then Coors light. To say that Guinness is better than Coors light is just an ignorance to the beer world. Both are Macro beers.

If you want an amazing Stout, Yetti from Great Divide, Cappuccino Stout from Laqunitas, Ten Fidy from Oskar Blues, and Old Rasputin from Northcoast are all amazing examples of what a Stout should be.

To get to truly pretentious beers, You have to move on to Lost Abbey's sour beers like Veritas 007, or Russian River's Supplication. F'n amazing beers, and exclusive.

houghtam
05-31-2010, 02:46 AM
Beer certainly is a matter of preference. If people want to have adjunct filled beer like coors, then that is what their flavor profile or palate wants.

Though Franziskaner is a weissbier, Hoegaarden is a wheat and Paulaner makes a variety (Including a great pils) Augustiner brau and Jever are the best examples of amazing German Style pils.

Now that Guinness is brewed in Canada, there isn't much difference between American (nitro tapped) and Irish tapped Guinness. The funny thing is, Guinness only has 120 calories and has less alcohol then Coors light. To say that Guinness is better than Coors light is just an ignorance to the beer world. Both are Macro beers.

If you want an amazing Stout, Yetti from Great Divide, Cappuccino Stout from Laqunitas, Ten Fidy from Oskar Blues, and Old Rasputin from Northcoast are all amazing examples of what a Stout should be.

To get to truly pretentious beers, You have to move on to Lost Abbey's sour beers like Veritas 007, or Russian River's Supplication. F'n amazing beers, and exclusive.

Couple of things..

Sure, matter of preference. I didn't much care for Augustiner...can't say IMO that it's the best example of much of anything.

Reason I'm picking on Guinness drinkers is because they remind me of people who follow teams because it's the cool thing to do, regardless of the substance. Sure, a lot of people like the Cowboys, but they're a terrible team and haven't been consistently good in 15 years.

Guiness IMO is a terrible beer, and in my experience the people who drink it do so watching everyone else's reaction. It's like "Mmmm I sure love this Guinness *retch* (God I hope people stop watching me so I can stop smiling and force this down)."

Drink your beer for the happiness it brings you, not the classiness it's supposed to signify.

The Joker
05-31-2010, 05:28 AM
Were you bullied by a pint of Guinness in school or something?

Plenty of beers I think are disgusting, but I'm not going to go concocting elaborate conspiracy theories as to why people REALLY drink that beer.

ZachKC
05-31-2010, 06:39 AM
Were you bullied by a pint of Guinness in school or something?

Plenty of beers I think are disgusting, but I'm not going to go concocting elaborate conspiracy theories as to why people REALLY drink that beer.

Yea, someone is trying too hard.

theAPAOps5
05-31-2010, 07:30 AM
lol

Non-pretentious beers:

Franziskaner
Hoegaarden (sp)
Paulaner

Guinness (in America) is something you find people drinking because they want to be "cool". Nevermind the fact that the American version tastes like a rump roast basted in coffee.

And no, I didn't miss the point of the thread. When I posted, it was one joke about how Guiness was better than three other equally disappointing beers. In the spirit of the thread, however, I will add my own joke.



Someone takes themselves too serious! Talk about Pretentious. Especially when you list those 3 non-pretentious beers :spit: People drink those in America because they hear about German beer and think they are drinking it. Except Hoegaarden of course, its dutch. But those aren't even in the top 10 of German Beer if you ask me and I lived there for 6 years!

:)

I love German Beer and I love Guiness it makes me happy when I drink it no other reason. But thanks for the laugh serious man!

BFDD
05-31-2010, 08:28 AM
Couple of things..

Sure, matter of preference. I didn't much care for Augustiner...can't say IMO that it's the best example of much of anything.

Reason I'm picking on Guinness drinkers is because they remind me of people who follow teams because it's the cool thing to do, regardless of the substance. Sure, a lot of people like the Cowboys, but they're a terrible team and haven't been consistently good in 15 years.

Guiness IMO is a terrible beer, and in my experience the people who drink it do so watching everyone else's reaction. It's like "Mmmm I sure love this Guinness *retch* (God I hope people stop watching me so I can stop smiling and force this down)."

Drink your beer for the happiness it brings you, not the classiness it's supposed to signify.

Maybe you are missing the point to Guinness, it was designed to be a session-able beer. Easy to go down, with little ABV. What people experience as a "thick" mouthfeal has to do with the nitro, not Guinness specifically.

The difference between Guinness and the Cowboys is that Guinness has consistantly been good for over 250 years. The Cowboys have Tony Homo.

It sounds like you are a beer geek like me, but its much much easier to convert folks to new and interesting brews without making fun of what they have to drink. I find that most people are just un-educated and just take a little sampling for them to go from Macro to Micro beers.

btw. While I love my German style pils, the Reinheitsgebot limits their imagination. The Belgiums truly have beer down to an art form. Our local brewers are just now catching on to the depths of where we can take this amazing product.

worm
05-31-2010, 08:40 AM
I love German Beer and I love Guiness it makes me happy when I drink it no other reason. But thanks for the laugh serious man!

Beer in general makes me happy. Guinness is awesome at the right time. I wouldn't drink it at the Lake in the middle of a summer day...but on a cold rainy night in Ireland it is almost perfect. As part of a car bomb it is a great start at the beginning of a session.

I never realized I was just drinking it to impress people.

elsid13
05-31-2010, 08:52 AM
1.
and one about beer...

What's the similarity between American beer and having sex in a canoe?
****ing close to water.

Then you have not a some of the wonderfully brew made by Stones, Bells or Lefthand other great little ones in America.

BTW, the Guinness Extra Stout served in American is fine brew for one made by large brewery conglomerate. Would it better if followed a traditional Irish Dry Stout recipe, yes but compared to the rice infused lagers that are being sold in this country it wins hands down.

The Joker
05-31-2010, 08:57 AM
I never realized I was just drinking it to impress people.

Me neither!

Meeting some of my friends for pints later, I wonder if they know the real reason they drink Guinness?

Miss I.
05-31-2010, 09:15 AM
Then you have not a some of the wonderfully brew made by Stones, Bells or Lefthand other great little ones in America.

BTW, the Guinness Extra Stout served in American is fine brew for one made by large brewery conglomerate. Would it better if followed a traditional Irish Dry Stout recipe, yes but compared to the rice infused lagers that are being sold in this country it wins hands down.

Okay, seriously, it was damn joke. I didn't write it and there are many find microbrews in the US. I have enjoyed many a pint from CO and OR. And hell even like Blue Moon which is manufactured by Coors for pete's sake. I even like Sam Adams, but if push comes to shove my favorite beer for the next 15 minutes or so is the stuff I've been drinking in Belgium, Tripel Karmelit was one of my favorites and as far as what I can get in UK, I usually get Leffe and that's fine. I do like Guinness for stouts, but I prefer Murphys. I did like the Guinness red I had the other day. But on the other hand I had a Fat Tire last night and that was fine too (I am in Denver today).

There are some snotty beer drinkers, I just like what I like. I also like girlie fru fru crap too and wine. I apparently like alcohol. Must be the irish in me.

elsid13
05-31-2010, 09:21 AM
Okay, seriously, it was damn joke. I didn't write it and there are many find microbrews in the US. I have enjoyed many a pint from CO and OR. And hell even like Blue Moon which is manufactured by Coors for pete's sake. I even like Sam Adams, but if push comes to shove my favorite beer for the next 15 minutes or so is the stuff I've been drinking in Belgium, Tripel Karmelit was one of my favorites and as far as what I can get in UK, I usually get Leffe and that's fine. I do like Guinness for stouts, but I prefer Murphys. I did like the Guinness red I had the other day. But on the other hand I had a Fat Tire last night and that was fine too (I am in Denver today).

There are some snotty beer drinkers, I just like what I like. I also like girlie fru fru crap too and wine. I apparently like alcohol. Must be the irish in me.

Miss I, I apologize. It wasn't meant to be an attack on my favorite DCMA rep. How the rotation going?

Miss I.
05-31-2010, 09:28 AM
Miss I, I apologize. It wasn't meant to be an attack on my favorite DCMA rep. How the rotation going?

Aside from apparently being cranky this fine Denver morning, it's all good. I love being in Denver right now, but I can't wait to get back either. It's been good seeing my parents. I guess the advice I got from friend Nancy was good and glad I took it. Made me realize how lucky I am to be in England right now, but also know I will be happy to make a home in Denver in 2 years.

And are you sure I am your favorite rep, seems like Broncoman13 would be. ;D

elsid13
05-31-2010, 09:32 AM
Aside from apparently being cranky this fine Denver morning, it's all good. I love being in Denver right now, but I can't wait to get back either. It's been good seeing my parents. I guess the advice I got from friend Nancy was good and glad I took it. Made me realize how lucky I am to be in England right now, but also know I will be happy to make a home in Denver in 2 years.

And are you sure I am your favorite rep, seems like Broncoman13 would be. ;D

I didn't realize Broncoman13 was a tech rep. The crankiness is most likely on my side. That happens when you work 76 hours in fours days and have phonecons over the weekend. Add in dose of senior leadership "help" and I am like a grizzly bear with tooth ache.

Miss I.
05-31-2010, 09:54 AM
I didn't realize Broncoman13 was a tech rep. The crankiness is most likely on my side. That happens when you work 76 hours in fours days and have phonecons over the weekend. Add in dose of senior leadership "help" and I am like a grizzly bear with tooth ache.

Oh he's not a tech rep, but we work for the same agency.

*WARHORSE*
05-31-2010, 12:20 PM
Put 1000 raider fans in a room with a simple addition problem and what do you get?




1000 dead raider fans.

BroncosSR
05-31-2010, 12:26 PM
I remember when I had my first beer too.

That was so funny I almost fell off my dinosaur...

Archer81
05-31-2010, 12:37 PM
Guinness is a bit much for me. On my 25th birthday I was dragged to bar after bar...(well...maybe not dragged but a bar is a bar) and my buddy (same one I had a three way with...long story) orders me an Irish car bomb. And then proceeds to order me an irish car bomb every other round...

Did you know that "epic vomit" exists? Its super rare...but much like a supernova destroys whole worlds.

So I tend to avoid Guinness.

:Broncos:

DenverBrit
05-31-2010, 12:40 PM
Guinness has never been one of my favorites, but for years, they have made some of the best beer ads.

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Bronco Boy
05-31-2010, 12:50 PM
A rabbi and a priest get into a car accident and it's a bad one. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly, neither are hurt. They crawl out of their cars and the rabbi sees the priest's collar and says, "So you're a priest. I'm a rabbi. Just look at our cars. There's nothing left but we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God. God must have meant that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace the rest of our days." And the priest said, "I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God."

And the rabbi said, "and look at this. Here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of Mogen David wine didn't break, surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune. And so he handed the bottle to the priest. The priest said he agreed, took a few big swigs, and handed the bottle back to the rabbi. The rabbi took the bottle, didn't drink at all, put the cap on, and handed it back to the priest. The priest asked, "aren't you going to have any?" And the rabbi replied, "No . . . I think I'll just wait for the police."

I thought the priest was going to have an unharmed 8 year old boy in his trunk that he wanted to celebrate. That would have been a better punch line.

houghtam
05-31-2010, 01:06 PM
Guinness is a bit much for me. On my 25th birthday I was dragged to bar after bar...(well...maybe not dragged but a bar is a bar) and my buddy (same one I had a three way with...long story) orders me an Irish car bomb. And then proceeds to order me an irish car bomb every other round...

Did you know that "epic vomit" exists? Its super rare...but much like a supernova destroys whole worlds.

So I tend to avoid Guinness.

:Broncos:

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Captain 'Dre
05-31-2010, 01:15 PM
Plenty of beers I think are disgusting, but I'm not going to go concocting elaborate conspiracy theories as to why people REALLY drink that beer.

Why the hell not?!? Ha!

Mediator12
05-31-2010, 01:18 PM
Beer certainly is a matter of preference. If people want to have adjunct filled beer like coors, then that is what their flavor profile or palate wants.

Though Franziskaner is a weissbier, Hoegaarden is a wheat and Paulaner makes a variety (Including a great pils) Augustiner brau and Jever are the best examples of amazing German Style pils.

Now that Guinness is brewed in Canada, there isn't much difference between American (nitro tapped) and Irish tapped Guinness. The funny thing is, Guinness only has 120 calories and has less alcohol then Coors light. To say that Guinness is better than Coors light is just an ignorance to the beer world. Both are Macro beers.

If you want an amazing Stout, Yetti from Great Divide, Cappuccino Stout from Laqunitas, Ten Fidy from Oskar Blues, and Old Rasputin from Northcoast are all amazing examples of what a Stout should be.

To get to truly pretentious beers, You have to move on to Lost Abbey's sour beers like Veritas 007, or Russian River's Supplication. F'n amazing beers, and exclusive.

You ever get 3 Floyds out there BFDD? If not, PM me about a trade for something.

I totally agree on beer, its all about personal preference. I love most of the Belgian Styles, German Hefeweizen, and Doublebock. The trappist styles are so unique compared to the hefe's, but I love Weihanstephan Hefeweizen. Probably my favorite beer. I can handle IPA's, Barleywine, and Stout's but I drink those less than the others.

The Russian River and Lost Abbey beers are ridiculously expensive here in INDY. I know BA loves those 2 breweries, but that is REALLY pretentious stuff at $40+ a bottle.

Broncos4tw
05-31-2010, 01:41 PM
Guinness is a great alternative when you can't get a nice stout or porter in your area. When I lived in Oregon, I used to play darts for an English bar. They imported all their beer, and had awesome stouts. Where I live now, they have crap. So between the few sad choices I do have, Guinness by far imo, is the best. Pretentious? This isn't a flipping martini, it's a beer.

Mogulseeker
05-31-2010, 01:57 PM
I like Guiness.

Gort
05-31-2010, 09:19 PM
Guinness may be better than the other three, but that's like comparing apples to rocket ships.

Overall, Guinness is a pretentious beer for pretentious people. It's not the same in America as it is overseas (like most beers), and I've found in my vast experience that people who say Guinness is the best haven't tried anything else.

Nickel's worth of free advice: try something else. Anything.

Guinness is warm piss... and beer snobbery is one of the most absurd things to be a snob about.

Dagmar
05-31-2010, 09:27 PM
http://images1.fanpop.com/images/image_uploads/Guiness-dublin-836316_332_500.jpg

Mogulseeker
05-31-2010, 09:34 PM
Guinness is warm piss... and beer snobbery is one of the most absurd things to be a snob about.

Guinness is really robust, and good on certain occasions.

I don't consider myself a beer snob, although some of you might. I just like my beer to taste like beer. Give me a good IPA, Malt or Brown Ale, and I'm happy.

Most mass produced beers are Pilsners (Bud, Coors, Miller), Lagers (Heineken), or Wheats (Blue Moon, Bud Wheat), and are by nature just not very beer-y.

Some good beers:
Fat Tire Amber Ale [New Belgium - Ft. Collins, CO]
Levity Ale (Brown Ale) [Odell - Ft. Collins, CO]
"Unsinkable Molly" Brown Ale [Rock Bottom - Denver, CO]
Stone IPA [Stone - Portland, OR]
Dead Guy IPA [Rogue - Portland, OR]
Hazed and Infused [Boulder Brewing - Boulder, CO]
Kurt Vonnegut's Mile High Malt [Wynkoop - Denver, CO]
Mile HiPA [Wynkoop - Denver, CO]
Blue Paw [Sea Dog - Topsham, ME]
Old East IPA [Sea Dog - Topsham, ME]
Wooly Booger Nut Brown Ale [Grand Lake Brewing - Grand Lake CO - the highest brewery in the western hemisphere]

I don't think it's a coincidence that most of the best micros are either in Colorado, Oregon, or Maine.

I stopped drinking the Keystone and Rolling Rock at the parties... if the object is to just get wasted, it's best to just down a fifth of Burnetts vodka, and that way you don't have to worry about carrying a cup everywhere and you can just talk to the girls.

elsid13
06-01-2010, 02:40 AM
Guinness is really robust, and good on certain occasions.

I don't consider myself a beer snob, although some of you might. I just like my beer to taste like beer. Give me a good IPA, Malt or Brown Ale, and I'm happy.

Most mass produced beers are Pilsners (Bud, Coors, Miller), Lagers (Heineken), or Wheats (Blue Moon, Bud Wheat), and are by nature just not very beer-y.

Some good beers:
Fat Tire Amber Ale [New Belgium - Ft. Collins, CO]
Levity Ale (Brown Ale) [Odell - Ft. Collins, CO]
"Unsinkable Molly" Brown Ale [Rock Bottom - Denver, CO]
Stone IPA [Stone - Portland, OR]
Dead Guy IPA [Rogue - Portland, OR]
Hazed and Infused [Boulder Brewing - Boulder, CO]
Kurt Vonnegut's Mile High Malt [Wynkoop - Denver, CO]
Mile HiPA [Wynkoop - Denver, CO]
Blue Paw [Sea Dog - Topsham, ME]
Old East IPA [Sea Dog - Topsham, ME]
Wooly Booger Nut Brown Ale [Grand Lake Brewing - Grand Lake CO - the highest brewery in the western hemisphere]

I don't think it's a coincidence that most of the best micros are either in Colorado, Oregon, or Maine.

I stopped drinking the Keystone and Rolling Rock at the parties... if the object is to just get wasted, it's best to just down a fifth of Burnetts vodka, and that way you don't have to worry about carrying a cup everywhere and you can just talk to the girls.

Stone is out of SD.

Mogulseeker
06-01-2010, 02:42 AM
I must've gotten it confused with Rogue

elsid13
06-01-2010, 02:43 AM
I must've gotten it confused with Rogue

Yeah. You need to get a hold of some of Bell's out of Michigan. One of my top three breweries in US.

TheElusiveKyleOrton
06-01-2010, 08:16 AM
Big Sky Brewing Co in Missoula is making some awesome stuff right now.

Same with Bayern Brewing Company and Kettle House, both in Missoula, as well.

Big Sky: Slow Elk Oatmeal Stout
Kettle House: Cold Smoke

TheElusiveKyleOrton
06-01-2010, 08:17 AM
Also, here's a joke I heard on the golf course yesterday.

Three-putting is a lot like masturbation. The first time you do it you're embarrassed, but you know you'll do it again.

v2micca
06-01-2010, 08:38 AM
Guinness is a bit much for me. On my 25th birthday I was dragged to bar after bar...(well...maybe not dragged but a bar is a bar) and my buddy (same one I had a three way with...long story) orders me an Irish car bomb. And then proceeds to order me an irish car bomb every other round...

Did you know that "epic vomit" exists? Its super rare...but much like a supernova destroys whole worlds.

So I tend to avoid Guinness.

:Broncos:


Ah yes.....I too had a Guinness "incident" while Bar Hopping......my friend who was with me at the time never lets me live it down.

Wes Mantooth
06-01-2010, 08:51 AM
I like Guinness. Favorite Stout however is the Terminator at McMinnemans.

Mediator12
06-01-2010, 08:53 AM
Yeah. You need to get a hold of some of Bell's out of Michigan. One of my top three breweries in US.

Bell's and 3 Floyds are 2 of the midwest's best breweries. I like 3 Floyds better than Bells right now as some of Bells offerings are average like their pale ale. Now, Hopslam and Three hearted IPA's are some of America's best IMO.

3 Floyds out of Munster has 5-6 of the best American beers I have ever had. Darklord Russian Imperial Stout, Dreadnaught IPA, Alpha King Pale Ale, Gumballhead American Wheat, Behemoth Barleywine, and Drunk Monk Hefeweizen are all as good as any in their class. By far and away the best brewery local to INDY.

Mediator12
06-01-2010, 08:55 AM
Guinness is really robust, and good on certain occasions.

I don't consider myself a beer snob, although some of you might. I just like my beer to taste like beer. Give me a good IPA, Malt or Brown Ale, and I'm happy.

Most mass produced beers are Pilsners (Bud, Coors, Miller), Lagers (Heineken), or Wheats (Blue Moon, Bud Wheat), and are by nature just not very beer-y.

Some good beers:
Fat Tire Amber Ale [New Belgium - Ft. Collins, CO]
Levity Ale (Brown Ale) [Odell - Ft. Collins, CO]
"Unsinkable Molly" Brown Ale [Rock Bottom - Denver, CO]
Stone IPA [Stone - Portland, OR]
Dead Guy IPA [Rogue - Portland, OR]
Hazed and Infused
Kurt Vonnegut's Mile High Malt [Wynkoop - Denver, CO]
Mile HiPA [Wynkoop - Denver, CO]
Blue Paw [Sea Dog - Topsham, ME]
Old East IPA [Sea Dog - Topsham, ME]
Wooly Booger Nut Brown Ale [Grand Lake Brewing - Grand Lake CO - the highest brewery in the western hemisphere]

[B]I don't think it's a coincidence that most of the best micros are either in Colorado, Oregon, or Maine.

I stopped drinking the Keystone and Rolling Rock at the parties... if the object is to just get wasted, it's best to just down a fifth of Burnetts vodka, and that way you don't have to worry about carrying a cup everywhere and you can just talk to the girls.

I think that is where you have been! Seriously, there are a ton of excellent US Breweries outside those states....

Ugly Duck
06-01-2010, 09:03 AM
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me....

houghtam
06-01-2010, 09:09 AM
Yeah. You need to get a hold of some of Bell's out of Michigan. One of my top three breweries in US.

Bell's is great. I'm sure there are countless places around the US that brew great beer. Otter Creek in VT, and Abida in LA are also quality.

And when the object IS to just get wasted, I drink beer anyway. Can't drink large amounts of hard alcohol for the same reason that Chris can't drink Guinness. Too many unfortunate incidents in my buddies basement back in high school, and at the fraternity house in college. I'll stick to beer, thanks.

Mogulseeker
06-01-2010, 09:14 AM
I think that is where you have been! Seriously, there are a ton of excellent US Breweries outside those states....

Partially true. I grew up in Colorado... I've been stationed in Illinois, Maryland/DC, Jacksonville FL, and Brunswick ME.

Never been to Oregon though.

ScottXray
06-01-2010, 12:07 PM
I like Guinness. Favorite Stout however is the Terminator at McMinnemans.

Love Terminator....
Can't stand Guiness.

To each their Own , I guess.

Wes Mantooth
06-01-2010, 01:43 PM
Love Terminator....
Can't stand Guiness.

To each their Own , I guess.

some think it to be sacrilege, but have you ever had the Rubinator?

Irish Stout
06-01-2010, 02:42 PM
Guinness is a light beer and as a light beer it is very decent. I don't mind tilting 3-6 pints of the dark stuff back on occassion. I would agree completely that it is not in the essence of a true stout, but thats why it is so drinkable to some.

Flex Gunmetal
06-01-2010, 03:09 PM
Who is this clown telling me guinness tastes bad?
I find it delicious when I'm not on a mirco-kick.

elsid13
06-01-2010, 05:15 PM
Bell's and 3 Floyds are 2 of the midwest's best breweries. I like 3 Floyds better than Bells right now as some of Bells offerings are average like their pale ale. Now, Hopslam and Three hearted IPA's are some of America's best IMO.

3 Floyds out of Munster has 5-6 of the best American beers I have ever had. Darklord Russian Imperial Stout, Dreadnaught IPA, Alpha King Pale Ale, Gumballhead American Wheat, Behemoth Barleywine, and Drunk Monk Hefeweizen are all as good as any in their class. By far and away the best brewery local to INDY.

I will have to keep an eye out for 3 Floyds. I'm real big fan of Bells Stouts and Porters.

elsid13
06-01-2010, 05:18 PM
Partially true. I grew up in Colorado... I've been stationed in Illinois, Maryland/DC, Jacksonville FL, and Brunswick ME.

Never been to Oregon though.


There are great breweries all over. But you are extremely lucky because the Great America Beer Festival is held in Denver and the top of top go there. The show is open to public on some days, and if you know a brewer you get to close door tastings.

hambone13
06-01-2010, 06:08 PM
Also, here's a joke I heard on the golf course yesterday.

Three-putting is a lot like masturbation. The first time you do it you're embarrassed, but you know you'll do it again.

REP That's awesome. Great golf joke.

hambone13
06-01-2010, 06:15 PM
Guinness is a light beer and as a light beer it is very decent. I don't mind tilting 3-6 pints of the dark stuff back on occassion. I would agree completely that it is not in the essence of a true stout, but thats why it is so drinkable to some.

Not to mention it makes for a great black turd when you have more than 6 :strong:

theAPAOps5
06-01-2010, 06:17 PM
Mmmmm having one of those Guiness beers that makes me pretentious because I have no clue what I am drinking and whatever. I am conflicted though, it tastes so good and makes me happy but I am told that this isn't the case.

DivineLegion
06-01-2010, 06:56 PM
If you like Guiness you should try Bellhaven Scottish Draught Ale, same consistancy of Guiness but lighter.

Captain 'Dre
06-02-2010, 08:07 AM
Guinness is really robust, and good on certain occasions.

I don't consider myself a beer snob, although some of you might. I just like my beer to taste like beer. Give me a good IPA, Malt or Brown Ale, and I'm happy.

Most mass produced beers are Pilsners (Bud, Coors, Miller), Lagers (Heineken), or Wheats (Blue Moon, Bud Wheat), and are by nature just not very beer-y.

Some good beers:
Fat Tire Amber Ale [New Belgium - Ft. Collins, CO]
Levity Ale (Brown Ale) [Odell - Ft. Collins, CO]
"Unsinkable Molly" Brown Ale [Rock Bottom - Denver, CO]
Stone IPA [Stone - Portland, OR]
Dead Guy IPA [Rogue - Portland, OR]
Hazed and Infused [Boulder Brewing - Boulder, CO]
Kurt Vonnegut's Mile High Malt [Wynkoop - Denver, CO]
Mile HiPA [Wynkoop - Denver, CO]
Blue Paw [Sea Dog - Topsham, ME]
Old East IPA [Sea Dog - Topsham, ME]
Wooly Booger Nut Brown Ale [Grand Lake Brewing - Grand Lake CO - the highest brewery in the western hemisphere]

I don't think it's a coincidence that most of the best micros are either in Colorado, Oregon, or Maine.

I stopped drinking the Keystone and Rolling Rock at the parties... if the object is to just get wasted, it's best to just down a fifth of Burnetts vodka, and that way you don't have to worry about carrying a cup everywhere and you can just talk to the girls.

I'm not a big beer afficianado, but the bass player in my band turned me on to Stone IPA.

It's more "hop-y" than what I'm used to, but it's a good compromise between boring, watered-down American beers and froo-froo Eurpoean stuff.

elsid13
06-02-2010, 02:12 PM
I'm not a big beer afficianado, but the bass player in my band turned me on to Stone IPA.

It's more "hop-y" than what I'm used to, but it's a good compromise between boring, watered-down American beers and froo-froo Eurpoean stuff.

Try their Arrogant Bastard. It a great beer.

Mogulseeker
06-02-2010, 10:34 PM
Try their Arrogant Bastard. It a great beer.

I love Arrogant Bastard.