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View Full Version : 10 Reasons Why You Might Be A Pansy


ZONA
12-04-2009, 01:11 AM
Friend forward me this email, funny as hell. I had to give him crap because he can't bench his own body weight and he also never takes off his shirt when we play pick up whoops even if he is on the skins side. He just doesn't like his big gut bouncing around when there are chicks watching.......hahahaha. I wonder how many of these Bob has going for him.

Anyway, I thought it was funny stuff.

10 reasons why you might be a pansy

* You married the first girl you ever had sex with

* You don't wear your teams jersey at the sports bar for fear of conflict

* You're afraid to play a game of pick up basketball because you might be on the "no shirts" side

* You order fruit flavored cocktails instead of beer or whiskey when at the bar

* You prefer movies with Philip Seymour Hoffman over Clint Eastwood

* Your girlfriend has alot of male friends

* You NEVER look over at a car pulling up to the traffic light next to you

* You've been to the opera

* You call road side assistance when you have a flat tire

* You can't bench your own body weight

BroncoDoug
12-04-2009, 01:46 AM
well i can honestly say none of those apply to me, so I'm guessing i'm good to go...

Jesterhole
12-04-2009, 06:49 AM
2/10

Hogan11
12-04-2009, 06:58 AM
I could bench my body weight till I tore my rotator cuff. That injury has pretty much dusted me in the weight lifting dept.

..and I personally like Phillip Seymore Hoffman movies.

Meck77
12-04-2009, 07:00 AM
*When you give up on your football team in the offseason

Beantown Bronco
12-04-2009, 07:08 AM
* Your girlfriend has alot of male friends

What if my girlfriend has a lot, but my wife doesn't? Judges ruling please.

RaiderH8r
12-04-2009, 07:15 AM
What if my girlfriend has a lot, but my wife doesn't? Judges ruling please.

Judge rules; you're OK.

Pullin' side trim trumps side trim having too many dude friends. Somebody's gotta keep her occupied when she's not gettin her box rocked.

Br0nc0Buster
12-04-2009, 07:16 AM
*You have a poster of the band Asia in your house

Ray Finkle
12-04-2009, 07:20 AM
*you brag about your planned slaying of a girl on a website (you don't get much action), only to have the members find that girl and let her know....



too inside?

Br0nc0Buster
12-04-2009, 07:22 AM
*you brag about your planned slaying of a girl on a website (you don't get much action), only to have the members find that girl and let her know....



too inside?

wait did this actually happen?

Hilarious!

spdirty
12-04-2009, 07:26 AM
Phantom of the Opera doesnt count as opera right? Thats more of a badass live action movie. With cool music. K, so 2/10.

elsid13
12-04-2009, 07:31 AM
*you brag about your planned slaying of a girl on a website (you don't get much action), only to have the members find that girl and let her know....



too inside?

Not really. I would use the word douche not pansy with that one.

elsid13
12-04-2009, 07:31 AM
Phantom of the Opera doesnt count as opera right? Thats more of a badass live action movie. With cool music. K, so 2/10.

Wear a dress and walk backwards

Ray Finkle
12-04-2009, 07:46 AM
wait did this actually happen?

Hilarious!

oh it did....ask a certain fanboy Chiefs poster....:D

OABB
12-04-2009, 08:03 AM
You throw 20 picks and blame your recievers.

Kaylore
12-04-2009, 08:10 AM
Phillip Seymour Hoffman is a bad ass and I'll fight anyone who says otherwise.

Pseudofool
12-04-2009, 08:16 AM
Phillip Seymour Hoffman is a bad ass and I'll fight anyone who says otherwise.I thought the same thing. How is having the ability to act emasculating?

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 08:23 AM
What if my girlfriend has a lot, but my wife doesn't? Judges ruling please.

Just don't bring any STDs home to the wifey and your golden.

McDman
12-04-2009, 08:31 AM
Sigh, I have a couple.

I've been to the opera before, but I was in Italy and it was the second biggest stadium in the world for it. I went with my class.

My girlfriend had a lot of guy friends, the she cheated on me, multiple times, so I don't have one anymore. That bitch.

I used to be able to bench my weight, then I had back surgery and gained weight and couldn't work out.

I guess I'm a pansy, it's all good though.

Garcia Bronco
12-04-2009, 08:33 AM
What if my girlfriend has a lot, but my wife doesn't? Judges ruling please.

Two women on a string automatically makes you not a pansy

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 08:41 AM
I'm gonna have to go MayDay Malone on this thread:

Sam: "A real man doesn't have to prove how great he is by all that macho stuff."

Diane: "Really Sam? I'm impressed by the how much you've grown."

Sam: "No, a real man just has to bag a lot of babes."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QxaQ9cKYQXo

MayDay Malone lives.

Crushaholic
12-04-2009, 08:47 AM
10 reasons why you might be a pansy

* You married the first girl you ever had sex with

* You don't wear your teams jersey at the sports bar for fear of conflict

* You're afraid to play a game of pick up basketball because you might be on the "no shirts" side

* You order fruit flavored cocktails instead of beer or whiskey when at the bar

* You prefer movies with Tom Cruise over Clint Eastwood

* Your girlfriend has alot of male friends

* You NEVER look over at a car pulling up to the traffic light next to you

* You've been to the opera

* You call road side assistance when you have a flat tire

* You can't bench your own body weight

I took the liberty of fixing it. See "bolded" above...:sunshine:

Hogan11
12-04-2009, 09:11 AM
Phillip Seymour Hoffman is a bad ass and I'll fight anyone who says otherwise.

He's been great in everything I've ever seen him in.

Archer81
12-04-2009, 09:33 AM
* You manscape when you do not have a reason to (no gf, wife, bf, fb or dont go out for random hookups)


:Broncos:

Mr. Elway
12-04-2009, 09:40 AM
I would add these. You might be a pansey if:

- You can't drive stick
- You don't know how to use basic hand tools properly
- You use feminine grooming products
- You can't rig a home theater system
- Your dog does not respect you
- You prefer cats
- You think emo jeans look good on men

Chris
12-04-2009, 09:56 AM
0/10 - bitches.

Beantown Bronco
12-04-2009, 09:59 AM
* You manscape when you do not have a reason to (no gf, wife, bf, fb or dont go out for random hookups)


:Broncos:

Nice sweater....does it come in a v-neck?


<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/jeSuFU36o04&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/jeSuFU36o04&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

bowtown
12-04-2009, 10:01 AM
- You have the same haircut as Stevie Knicks
- You wear acid washed denim
- You pride yourself on knowing a lot about the roots of glam rock
- You write terrible posts and lie about how Mike Mayock stole them
- You lie about who has mentored you
- You fail at life

Archer81
12-04-2009, 10:02 AM
* You thought Titanic was awesome for its acting.

* You watched BrideWars for any reason.

* You sit down to pee.


:Broncos:

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 10:06 AM
* Your girlfriend tells you what haircut to get.

* You get the haircut your girfriend wants.

* You blow dry your hair.

* You don't understand that real men don't ever blow dry their hair.

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 10:20 AM
* You refuse to throat punch a hottie even though she's a jagwad's fan.

Archer81
12-04-2009, 10:24 AM
* You think you know football because you kick ass on the lowest difficulty setting on Madden 10.

* You dont like Braveheart because its violent.

* You have put on women's clothing for more than a cheap laugh.

* You start a band dedicated to the power of butt rock.

* You went camping but wound up in a hotel room.

* You go to restaurants and ask for skinless, boiled chicken rather than a steak.

:Broncos:

Rock Chalk
12-04-2009, 10:28 AM
Gust in Charlie Wilson's War (Played by Hoffman) is one of my all time favorite cinema characters. He rules.

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 10:30 AM
* You like Miracle Whip over Mayonaise.

* You put ketchup on a steak.

* You put cologne on your neck and behind your ears.

* You find obscene gestures silly in the grocery store.

Archer81
12-04-2009, 10:34 AM
* You think soy milk tastes like the real thing.

* You use the term chuckle nutz.

* You use a rider lawnmower for your postage stamp sized yard.

* You peel grapes or pull the string out of celery because its "icky".

* You shave on the weekends when you dont have to.

* You watch Oprah live or dvr it.

:Broncos:

Beantown Bronco
12-04-2009, 10:37 AM
You put ketchup on a steak.


I don't know about steak, but how about some of these:

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Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 10:45 AM
* Your poster name is from an obscure scifi drama (see Lex).

* You know someone's poster name is from an obscure scifi drama (gulp).

* You post that you know someone's poster name is from an obscure scifi drama (please God help me).

Dr. Broncenstein
12-04-2009, 10:45 AM
* you create interweb threads to satisfy your toughguy fantasy

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 10:59 AM
* You shower even though you are not dirty.

* You change your underwear more than once a day.

* You think men's underwear is important.

* You pretend to be a doctor on a Denver Broncos fan's message board.

Kaylore
12-04-2009, 11:06 AM
* You thought Titanic was awesome for its acting.

* You watched BrideWars for any reason.

* You sit down to pee.


:Broncos:

THIS!

* You like Miracle Whip over Mayonaise.
Miracle whip is awesome. I don't care if a council headed by Jack Youngblood, Maximus Decimus Meridius and Charlton Heston declare it not manly. I'll eat it in a tutu.

RaiderH8r
12-04-2009, 11:12 AM
* You thought Titanic was awesome for its acting.

* You watched BrideWars for any reason.

* You sit down to pee.


:Broncos:

I sat down to pee once, but to be fair it was only because I was too drunk to stand.

Archer81
12-04-2009, 11:15 AM
* You wear chaps when you have no reason to

* You will completely dress out when it snows in the morning JUST to get the paper.

* You have lady gaga's poker face as a ring tone.

* You know which fork is the salad fork.

* You think the Prius is the best car ever made.

:Broncos:

Archer81
12-04-2009, 11:17 AM
I sat down to pee once, but to be fair it was only because I was too drunk to stand.


See, the drunk thing cancels out the pansiness. Balance is important when you gotta go. But if you sit to pee as a norm...then the pansy-effect is in full.


:Broncos:

Br0nc0Buster
12-04-2009, 11:21 AM
* You like Miracle Whip over Mayonaise.

* You put ketchup on a steak.

* You put cologne on your neck and behind your ears.

* You find obscene gestures silly in the grocery store.

whats wrong with this again?
I actually do that.... :ouwknow:

Br0nc0Buster
12-04-2009, 11:22 AM
He's been great in everything I've ever seen him in.

his standup comedy is really good to

STBumpkin
12-04-2009, 11:25 AM
THIS!


Miracle whip is awesome. I don't care if a council headed by Jack Youngblood, Maximus Decimus Meridius and Charlton Heston declare it not manly. I'll eat it in a tutu.

* Your poster name is from an obscure scifi drama

cmhargrove
12-04-2009, 11:25 AM
* You don't have a roll of magical duct tape to fix things with.

* You don't have a roll of magical "duck" tape to fix things with.

* You have Whitney Houston or Celine Dion on your ipod.

* You complain about how little the cheerleaders are wearing at the game.

* You listen to any loudmouth Chargers fan without telling him you'll kick his ass immediately off the bandwagon.

* You know all the past winners of "Project Runway."

* You've never used any substance (other than toilet paper) to wipe your ass with. Leaves for example...

* You're not quite sure what the acronyms UFC, SOB, FUBAR, or SOL mean.

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 11:29 AM
whats wrong with this again?
I actually do that.... :ouwknow:

Little tip for you:

Never use cologne. Only use aftershave. Let me repeat that: Only! Use! Aftershave!

Furthermore, one splashes aftershave. You don't tinkle it behind your damn ears. Good God Man!

Pansy's use cologne. Sorry to rain on your parade.

Pony Boy
12-04-2009, 11:35 AM
You let you wife find your girlfriends name in your cell phone and she beats the crap out of you with your own golf club and to make matters worse you wreck your Escalade....

Archer81
12-04-2009, 11:35 AM
* You consider waxing of the man area to be acceptable.

* You dont get chills at the ending of the Rocky movies.

* You buy underwear based on fashion trends, and not for comfort or support.

* You are in a frat (kidding)

* You think sharing deodorant is OK.

:Broncos:

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 11:39 AM
You let you wife find your girlfriends name in your cell phone and she beats the crap out of you with your own golf club and to make matters worse you wreck your Escalade....

Does Tiger get a pass because he's banging another hottie? Judges ruling on this...

loborugger
12-04-2009, 11:41 AM
THIS!


Miracle whip is awesome. I don't care if a council headed by Jack Youngblood, Maximus Decimus Meridius and Charlton Heston declare it not manly. I'll eat it in a tutu.

I was totally with you up until the tutu part.

Archer81
12-04-2009, 11:42 AM
* You think having a tongue ring makes you trendy. It just signals to the rest of us that you will gob a knob or 3.

* You wear your sunglasses at night

* You thought Topgun was the best movie ever made.

* You think hairplugs are the way to go.

* Your side of the bathroom sink has more junk on it then your signifigant other's.

* You use a wash cloth.

* You donate to greenpeace.

:Broncos:

loborugger
12-04-2009, 11:43 AM
* You consider waxing of the man area to be acceptable.



Havent done it, but what if you are doing it at the request of your woman?

Archer81
12-04-2009, 11:45 AM
Havent done it, but what if you are doing it at the request of your woman?


Hmm...you would have to question why your woman wants all the hair gone, rather than trimmed down.


:Broncos:

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 11:49 AM
Havent done it, but what if you are doing it at the request of your woman?

You really need to ask her a simple question: "Honey, do you prefer boys over men?"

Pony Boy
12-04-2009, 11:52 AM
Tummy tuck
Get your nipples pierced.....
Wear a Chiefs wife beater...

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 11:53 AM
* You have never given your g-friend a Big Gulp.

* You shave your privates for said g-friend.

* Your g-friend's g-spot is a mystery to you.

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 12:04 PM
So yesterday I'm at the grocery with my girlfriend... we're in the produce section... I grab the largest cucumber I can find, saunter over to the oranges and grab a couple of those, then proceed to put the cucumber and oranges in front of my groin (mimicing a large penis and balls) and walk over to my girlfriend.

I then look her dead in the eyes and ask "Are you interested?"

Hell, even the kids love that kind of dumbasss comedy!

RaiderH8r
12-04-2009, 12:12 PM
* You think having a tongue ring makes you trendy. It just signals to the rest of us that you will gob a knob or 3.

* You wear your sunglasses at night

* You thought Topgun was the best movie ever made.

* You think hairplugs are the way to go.

* Your side of the bathroom sink has more junk on it then your signifigant other's.

* You use a wash cloth.

* You donate to greenpeace.

:Broncos:

Dude...

I wear my sunglasses at night
so I can
so I can
Watch you weave then breath your story lines.
And I wear my sunglasses at night
so I can
so I can
Keep track of the visions in my eyes.
While she's deceiving me
it cuts my security.
Has she got control of me? - I turn to her and say:
Don't switch the blade on the guy in shades
oh no.
Don't masquerade with the guy in shades
oh no
I can't believe it!
You got it made with the guy in shades
oh no.
And I wear my sunglasses at night
so I car `
Forget my name while you collect your cla1
so I can
And I wear my sunglasses at night
so I carim.
See the light that's right before my eyes. 1
so I can
While she's deceiving me it cuts my security
. . .
Don't switch the blade on the guy in shades
oh no.
Don't masquerade with the guy in shades
oh no
I can't believe it!
Don't be afraid of the guy in shades
oh no
it can't escape you

'cus you got it made with the guy in shades
oh no.
I said: I wear my sunglasses at night.
I wear my sunglasses at night
I wear my sunglasses at night.
I said to you now: I wear my sunglasses at night

I wear my sunglasses at night
I wear my sunglasses at night.
I cry to you: I wear my sunglasses at night. I wear my sunglasses at night

Mr. Elway
12-04-2009, 12:12 PM
* you create interweb threads to satisfy your toughguy fantasy

* If you feel the need to put your medical credentials in your username and description in hopes of exacting the proper deference.

KIDDING!

Old Dude
12-04-2009, 12:26 PM
3/10, but the opera thing wasn't really voluntary.

Beantown Bronco
12-04-2009, 12:30 PM
I just found some footage of Dr. Broncenstein running around the local grocery store:

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ZONA
12-04-2009, 01:00 PM
* You shave on the weekends when you dont have to.
:

Alright, I think this one can officially be added to the list. No doubt you are a pansy if you shave on the weekends and don't have to. Further more, if you shave on a weekend while you are camping, you are a wuss who gets beat up by pansies.

cousinal11
12-04-2009, 01:26 PM
Alright, I think this one can officially be added to the list. No doubt you are a pansy if you shave on the weekends and don't have to. Further more, if you shave on a weekend while you are camping, you are a wuss who gets beat up by pansies.

Who shaves when they're camping?

Pansies. That's who.

cousinal11
12-04-2009, 01:34 PM
-If you prematurely end a round of golf because it starts to rain, you're a pansy.

-If you wear crocs, you're probably a pansy, well, you definitely look like a pansy.

-If you attend dook, you're a pansy among other things.

-If you don't like chicken wings because they're "too much work", you're a pansy.

-If you know the thread count of your sheets, you're a pansy.

-If you're having beers with your buddies and you order a water with your meal, you're a pansy.

-If you're at a bachelor party and you're the first person to go to bed without hurling, you're a pansy.

loborugger
12-04-2009, 01:44 PM
-If you prematurely end a round of golf because it starts to rain, you're a pansy.


More than a few on here would argue that even playing a round of golf makes you a pansy.

cousinal11
12-04-2009, 01:47 PM
More than a few on here would argue that even playing a round of golf makes you a pansy.

I thought I might get this type of response on this one.

In NC, you either drink beer, chew tobacco and shoot deer or drink beer, smoke cigars and play golf. I golf.

Beantown Bronco
12-04-2009, 01:49 PM
In NC, you either drink beer, chew tobacco and shoot deer or drink beer, smoke cigars and play golf. I golf.

So what you're saying is....you're a pansy.

cousinal11
12-04-2009, 01:51 PM
So what you're saying is....you're a pansy.

Dammit. I see this has backfired on me.

loborugger
12-04-2009, 01:52 PM
Hmm...you would have to question why your woman wants all the hair gone, rather than trimmed down.


:Broncos:

Well, we joked around about it, cuz guys are always asking their women to trim. We agreed, however, that while a trimmed chick is ok, a trimmed dude looks weird.

However, I would say that if your women requested it, it shouldnt be considered a pansy thing.

Beantown Bronco
12-04-2009, 01:57 PM
We agreed, however, that while a trimmed chick is ok, a trimmed dude looks weird.

You agreed? Exactly how many trimmed dudes have you been checking out?

Jason in LA
12-04-2009, 01:58 PM
Friend forward me this email, funny as hell. I had to give him crap because he can't bench his own body weight and he also never takes off his shirt when we play pick up whoops even if he is on the skins side. He just doesn't like his big gut bouncing around when there are chicks watching.......hahahaha. I wonder how many of these Bob has going for him.

Anyway, I thought it was funny stuff.

10 reasons why you might be a pansy

* You married the first girl you ever had sex with

* You don't wear your teams jersey at the sports bar for fear of conflict

* You're afraid to play a game of pick up basketball because you might be on the "no shirts" side

* You order fruit flavored cocktails instead of beer or whiskey when at the bar

* You prefer movies with Philip Seymour Hoffman over Clint Eastwood

* Your girlfriend has alot of male friends

* You NEVER look over at a car pulling up to the traffic light next to you

* You've been to the opera

* You call road side assistance when you have a flat tire

* You can't bench your own body weight

I can dig it. But I wouldn't say going to the opera makes a guy a pansy. It's kind of a high class thing, which always makes a man look more impressive.

I have a guy friend who orders fruity cocktail drinks. I think he's gay.

Not being able to change a tire is unmanly. It is quicker to do it yourself then wait for a real man to come and change it for you.

Having a girlfriend who has a lot of guy friends would be a problem. Like, I can deal with guy acquaintances, but like friends, who want to take her out and stuff? Yeah... no. That's not going to work. I'm not into changing people, so I just would not be able to continue with her on a committed level.

Tombstone RJ
12-04-2009, 03:31 PM
* Your a pansy if you refuse to shot gun a beer.

* Your a pansy if you've never bonged a beer.

* Your a pansy if you've never done keg laps.

* Your a pansy if you've never chugged tequila. From the bottle.

* Your a pansy if you've never held your girlfriend's head up while she yaks in the toilet.

* Your a pansy if you did not nail said girlfriend after she's yaked in the toilet.

* Your a pansy if you have not consumed beer for breakfast.

* Your a pansy if you have not killed a hangover by consuming more liquor.

Pony Boy
12-04-2009, 03:34 PM
I thought I might get this type of response on this one.

In NC, you either drink beer, chew tobacco and shoot deer or drink beer, smoke cigars and play golf. I golf.

We drink beer, chew tobacco, smoke cigars play golf at the same time with a lot of gambeling on the side....

Pony Boy
12-04-2009, 03:36 PM
Well, we joked around about it, cuz guys are always asking their women to trim. We agreed, however, that while a trimmed chick is ok, a trimmed dude looks weird.

However, I would say that if your women requested it, it shouldnt be considered a pansy thing.

The thought never even crossed my mind to give 'big dick and the twins" a haircut.......

cousinal11
12-04-2009, 03:39 PM
We drink beer, chew tobacco, smoke cigars play golf at the same time with a lot of gambeling on the side....

Alcohol, nicotine, sport, and gambling. Good times.

listopencil
12-04-2009, 03:41 PM
Little tip for you:

Never use cologne. Only use aftershave. Let me repeat that: Only! Use! Aftershave!

Furthermore, one splashes aftershave. You don't tinkle it behind your damn ears. Good God Man!

Pansy's use cologne. Sorry to rain on your parade.


I usually give my nuts and penis a nice little splash of Old Spice in the morning after I shower. Just a palm full. Wakes me up and the ladies at work appreciate not smelling my stinky crotch when I get sweaty.

BroncoMan4ever
12-04-2009, 03:44 PM
* You order fruit flavored cocktails instead of beer or whiskey when at the bar



i have a question on this one. what if i don't drink alcohol at all? not because of being a bitch and not liking the taste or for religious reasons, but just simply because i don't like the type of person i am when i drink

i need a judges ruling on that

ak1971
12-04-2009, 03:44 PM
I usually give my nuts and penis a nice little splash of Old Spice in the morning after I shower. Just a palm full. Wakes me up and the ladies at work appreciate not smelling my stinky crotch when I get sweaty.

I usually drink half a bottle of Old Spice after getting out of the shower.

Hogan11
12-04-2009, 04:06 PM
The thought never even crossed my mind to give 'big dick and the twins" a haircut.......

I'm told that it's considered a "hygiene" issue by practitioners

Kaylore
12-04-2009, 04:32 PM
You're a pansy if you spell you're "your."

You're a pansy if say "would of" when you mean "would have."

STBumpkin
12-04-2009, 05:32 PM
You're a pansy if you spell you're "your."

You're a pansy if say "would of" when you mean "would have."

Naw, just uneducated.

FireFly
12-04-2009, 05:46 PM
I took the liberty of fixing it. See "bolded" above...:sunshine:

Dude, last samurai, top gun, mission impossible

Archer81
12-04-2009, 07:48 PM
I usually give my nuts and penis a nice little splash of Old Spice in the morning after I shower. Just a palm full. Wakes me up and the ladies at work appreciate not smelling my stinky crotch when I get sweaty.


When I was a teenager, my dad would use old spice deodorant on the family ball bag and hose. Then he wondered why there would be 15 half used sticks of deodorant underneath the sink...


:Broncos:

spdirty
12-04-2009, 08:06 PM
- You prefer cats


Actually, if your wife has a cat, you never see it because it constantly is hiding under your kids bed from your dog and devil child, it doesnt stink, doesnt make noise, and is completely potty trained.

Your friend asks you to take care of his weiner dog while he's on vacation. Now that little **** is about half the size of the cat, barks like crazy every time you breathe, despite what his owner says he actually isnt potty trained and turns your house into a minefield, shakes/shivers constantly, always has his tail between his legs so if you pick him up it feels like his "thing" is touching your hand, and it yelps like it just got kicked across the room every time you get close to it, yell at it, look at it cross. And even though the friend said it loves its cage at night, when you put it in there it thinks its performng an all night dog concert. And it looks like a rat with floppy ears.

Now I have a dog, a blue heeler pup, I love that dog, great great great pup, as loyal as it gets, smart, playful, everything youd ever want in a dog, but I would take 5 cats before 1 weiner dog.

Judges?

Archer81
12-04-2009, 08:32 PM
Actually, if your wife has a cat, you never see it because it constantly is hiding under your kids bed from your dog and devil child, it doesnt stink, doesnt make noise, and is completely potty trained.

Your friend asks you to take care of his weiner dog while he's on vacation. Now that little **** is about half the size of the cat, barks like crazy every time you breathe, despite what his owner says he actually isnt potty trained and turns your house into a minefield, shakes/shivers constantly, always has his tail between his legs so if you pick him up it feels like his "thing" is touching your hand, and it yelps like it just got kicked across the room every time you get close to it, yell at it, look at it cross. And even though the friend said it loves its cage at night, when you put it in there it thinks its performng an all night dog concert. And it looks like a rat with floppy ears.

Now I have a dog, a blue heeler pup, I love that dog, great great great pup, as loyal as it gets, smart, playful, everything youd ever want in a dog, but I would take 5 cats before 1 weiner dog.

Judges?


I'd agree. My brother has a weiner dog named Marvin...I'd take my cat over a weiner dog. If I wanted a pet rat I'd get a rat, you know?

:Broncos:

STBumpkin
12-04-2009, 08:41 PM
Actually, if your wife has a cat, you never see it because it constantly is hiding under your kids bed from your dog and devil child, it doesnt stink, doesnt make noise, and is completely potty trained.

Your friend asks you to take care of his weiner dog while he's on vacation. Now that little **** is about half the size of the cat, barks like crazy every time you breathe, despite what his owner says he actually isnt potty trained and turns your house into a minefield, shakes/shivers constantly, always has his tail between his legs so if you pick him up it feels like his "thing" is touching your hand, and it yelps like it just got kicked across the room every time you get close to it, yell at it, look at it cross. And even though the friend said it loves its cage at night, when you put it in there it thinks its performng an all night dog concert. And it looks like a rat with floppy ears.

Now I have a dog, a blue heeler pup, I love that dog, great great great pup, as loyal as it gets, smart, playful, everything youd ever want in a dog, but I would take 5 cats before 1 weiner dog.

Judges?

If you can flush it, it's not a dog.

spdirty
12-04-2009, 08:47 PM
If you can flush it, it's not a dog.

:rofl: thanks.

broncswin
12-04-2009, 08:51 PM
I usually give my nuts and penis a nice little splash of Old Spice in the morning after I shower. Just a palm full. Wakes me up and the ladies at work appreciate not smelling my stinky crotch when I get sweaty.

wow!!:afro:

ZONA
12-04-2009, 08:58 PM
* You do nothing when some dude cuts in line in front of you and acts like he knows the person he is now standing next to.

* You are at the gym and a chick next to you is lifting more weight then you

* You hold your farts in until you leave the room your girlfriend is in so she won't hear them

* You've never scratched your sack in front of a chick

* You notice when other men have their zippers down, and then you go and tell them

* You feel embarrassed when a female doctor gives you a physical

* You put your foot into the pool water to test the temperature

* You decide to use a toilet because there is another man standing at the urinal next to the open one you just decided to avoid

Archer81
12-04-2009, 09:07 PM
* You do nothing when some dude cuts in line in front of you and acts like he knows the person he is now standing next to.

* You are at the gym and a chick next to you is lifting more weight then you

* You hold your farts in until you leave the room your girlfriend is in so she won't hear them

* You've never scratched your sack in front of a chick

* You notice when other men have their zippers down, and then you go and tell them

* You feel embarrassed when a female doctor gives you a physical

* You put your foot into the pool water to test the temperature

* You decide to use a toilet because there is another man standing at the urinal next to the open one you just decided to avoid


The opposite of this is being alone in a public bathroom at a row of 5 or more urinals, a joker comes in and takes the one right next to you. Most common at movie theaters.


:Broncos:

ZONA
12-04-2009, 09:14 PM
The opposite of this is being alone in a public bathroom at a row of 5 or more urinals, a joker comes in and takes the one right next to you. Most common at movie theaters.

:Broncos:

Oh that, yeah, that's usually just a gay dude or somebody who is trying to overcome their inner pansiness and they feel they must go alpha male on your ass and stand right next to you and piss.

spdirty
12-04-2009, 09:21 PM
- you dont pee in the shower.

- you have never peed on your girlfriend/wife while taking a shower with her.

- you have never given your gf/wife a dutch oven.

- you have never fantasized about putting a weiner dog in a cage with a python.

- you are a raiders/chiefs/chargers/red wings/lakers/cornhuskers fan.

- out of respect, you dont pleasure yourself when your wife/gf is going through "that time of the month."

BroncoMan4ever
12-04-2009, 09:22 PM
The opposite of this is being alone in a public bathroom at a row of 5 or more urinals, a joker comes in and takes the one right next to you. Most common at movie theaters.


:Broncos:

Man Law states that a man must give at least a 1 urinal buffer zone between himself and another man, unless the urinals are all in use, then it becomes acceptable to use the urinal next to another man, but it remains man law that you shut the **** up and keep your eyes on your own dick or straight ahead.

spdirty
12-04-2009, 09:23 PM
The opposite of this is being alone in a public bathroom at a row of 5 or more urinals, a joker comes in and takes the one right next to you. Most common at movie theaters.


:Broncos:

that happened to me last saturday at the movie theater. :notthissh

BroncoMan4ever
12-04-2009, 09:32 PM
- you have never taken one for the team. meaning when out with friends at a bar or club and a friend has the chance to hook up with an extremely hot chick only for her ugly ass friend to pop up and attempt to cock block your boy. if you have never stepped up and banged that ugly friend to give your friend his shot at a major hottie you are not only a pansy, but also a cock blocker

- you agreed to a fiance that you would either not take the groom to be to a strip club or allow him to drink. or if you are the groom to be, you agreed not to party with boze and strippers, not only are you a pansy, but also a bitch

Archer81
12-04-2009, 09:33 PM
that happened to me last saturday at the movie theater. :notthissh


I dont get it. Especially at the cinemark in Pueblo...it has 10 ****ing urinals in a row, and corky the wanna be rapist takes the pisser right next to me. And you think dude, what do you care, you are gay...its a public ****ing restroom, I'm not gonna go crazy and get down in a movie theater; also, thats just gross. Im in there to piss, not hook up. And why do they ****ing talk to you? Let me know if the following is familiar...
Offending jerkass: "Its cold out, huh?"
me: Uhh...yeah, i suppose it is...
OJ: "nice movie weather"...
me: *polite laugh* yeah man, I guess it is. *pointed staring RIGHT at the wall in front of me*
OJ: "my kids dragged me down to this damn (insert movie title)"
me: ...dude, I dont care. *zips up, and walks to the sink, washes hands, leaves without drying*

:Broncos:

Archer81
12-04-2009, 09:36 PM
- you have never taken one for the team. meaning when out with friends at a bar or club and a friend has the chance to hook up with an extremely hot chick only for her ugly ass friend to pop up and attempt to cock block your boy. if you have never stepped up and banged that ugly friend to give your friend his shot at a major hottie you are not only a pansy, but also a cock blocker

- you agreed to a fiance that you would either not take the groom to be to a strip club or allow him to drink. or if you are the groom to be, you agreed not to party with boze and strippers, not only are you a pansy, but also a b****


When I was about 26-27, I did this. It was horrifying. Hanging out with the USS Widethighs while my buddy was upstairs "showing the hot chick the house"...gay dudes make excellent wingmen. Distraction factor allows our straight bretheren to infilitrate the chick field and get some.

:Broncos:


:Broncos:

ZONA
12-04-2009, 09:47 PM
- you have never peed on your girlfriend/wife while taking a shower with her.



yeah........about that. You might be going solo on that one dirty. Can't say that I've ever needed to or wanted to piss on a chick, not in the shower or anywhere really. That's not really a pansy issue, but probably more so a fetish of yours. Look into it.

spdirty
12-04-2009, 09:53 PM
I dont get it. Especially at the cinemark in Pueblo...it has 10 ****ing urinals in a row, and corky the wanna be rapist takes the pisser right next to me. And you think dude, what do you care, you are gay...its a public ****ing restroom, I'm not gonna go crazy and get down in a movie theater; also, thats just gross. Im in there to piss, not hook up. And why do they ****ing talk to you? Let me know if the following is familiar...
Offending jerkass: "Its cold out, huh?"
me: Uhh...yeah, i suppose it is...
OJ: "nice movie weather"...
me: *polite laugh* yeah man, I guess it is. *pointed staring RIGHT at the wall in front of me*
OJ: "my kids dragged me down to this damn (insert movie title)"
me: ...dude, I dont care. *zips up, and walks to the sink, washes hands, leaves without drying*

:Broncos:

I was the only one in the restroom. I took the urinal at the end, so if anyone ever came in they would have 5 other urinals to go to besides the one NEXT TO ME!!! I mean even if the dude was gay, why in the hell would he create this damn awkwardness by gong to the one NEXT TO ME?

I mean if I walk into a restroom and I see a dude at a urinal at the end I go to THE OTHER END to piss.

And the talking is just so ****ing awkward. Its like dude, Im holding my dick in my hands. Your less than 10 feet away holding your dick in your hands. DONT ****ING TALK TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anaximines
12-04-2009, 09:54 PM
* You let a forwarded email tell you you're a pansy

broncocalijohn
12-04-2009, 10:06 PM
The thought never even crossed my mind to give 'big dick and the twins" a haircut.......

Do it every 3-4 months. I am married and no reason to "make it look bigger" but a weed wacker trim with the trimmer is no big deal. What is a big deal is leaving the "mess" on the bathroom floor. That will get one pissed off wife on your A$$ quickly. By then, you dont care what qualifies as a pansy; You just better clean it up pronto. Single guys on the hunt? Good trim can go a long ways. Pun intended.

BroncoMan4ever
12-04-2009, 10:08 PM
When I was about 26-27, I did this. It was horrifying. Hanging out with the USS Widethighs while my buddy was upstairs "showing the hot chick the house"...gay dudes make excellent wingmen. Distraction factor allows our straight bretheren to infilitrate the chick field and get some.

:Broncos:


:Broncos:

the day i turned 21. my cousins and i went out to have a good time. my cousin was pumping this chick with drinks all night, until finally at about 2 in the morning she agrees to come home with him. so by that time i am **** faced and don't really know what is going on.

i don't really know what happened, all i know is what my cousins told me. once my cousin got a yes from the girl that she would go home with him, her friend who looked like Ryan Clady in a dress pops up and says to the girl my cousin was working "we came together we need to leave together"

now according to my cousins, i had beer goggles going bad, and i literally got up from the table walked up to Ryan Clady in a dress and told her she could come home with my cousin her friend and myself, and that i would love to keep her company for the night.

i was so **** faced that night that i not only jumped on that grenade for my cousin to allow him to get laid, but i willingly did it thinking i was hooking up with a hottie.

for those that have seen the movie Beerfest, the scene where Barry is hammered and hooks up with that huge chick is from what i have been told exactly what went down with me that night. i thought i was the smoothest mofo in the bar, and that i was about to hookup with the hottest chick in the bar only to wake up and seriously give thought to killing myself for what i had done the night before.

broncocalijohn
12-04-2009, 10:12 PM
Alcohol, nicotine, sport, and gambling. Good times.

Those are the four basic Dude groups. Not saying they are all good though. I am not a porn guy but that should replace nicotine any day. Porn doesnt kill but ciggys will.

Archer81
12-04-2009, 10:13 PM
the day i turned 21. my cousins and i went out to have a good time. my cousin was pumping this chick with drinks all night, until finally at about 2 in the morning she agrees to come home with him. so by that time i am **** faced and don't really know what is going on.

i don't really know what happened, all i know is what my cousins told me. once my cousin got a yes from the girl that she would go home with him, her friend who looked like Ryan Clady in a dress pops up and says to the girl my cousin was working "we came together we need to leave together"

now according to my cousins, i had beer goggles going bad, and i literally got up from the table walked up to Ryan Clady in a dress and told her she could come home with my cousin her friend and myself, and that i would love to keep her company for the night.

i was so **** faced that night that i not only jumped on that grenade for my cousin to allow him to get laid, but i willingly did it thinking i was hooking up with a hottie.

for those that have seen the movie Beerfest, the scene where Barry is hammered and hooks up with that huge chick is from what i have been told exactly what went down with me that night. i thought i was the smoothest mofo in the bar, and that i was about to hookup with the hottest chick in the bar only to wake up and seriously give thought to killing myself for what i had done the night before.


Ryan Clady buzz cut or Ryan Clady dreads?:rofl:

Thats awesome of you to do though. Fat girls need love too Craig...


:Broncos:

BroncoMan4ever
12-04-2009, 11:22 PM
Ryan Clady buzz cut or Ryan Clady dreads?:rofl:

Thats awesome of you to do though. Fat girls need love too Craig...


:Broncos:

Ryan Clady dreads

SJ Bronco
12-04-2009, 11:32 PM
only 1. Being a Dad has made taking my shirt off in public an arrestable offense. :D I'd do it, but the opponents won't be happy.

BTW- What genuine loser can't change a tire? I changed my tire in my tux on my way to my wedding with no side affects.

I would add these. You might be a pansey if:

- You can't drive stick
- You don't know how to use basic hand tools properly
- You use feminine grooming products
- You can't rig a home theater system
- Your dog does not respect you
- You prefer cats
- You think emo jeans look good on men

This like a mother ****er!

Archer81
12-05-2009, 11:20 PM
* You get your wife/gf to kill the spider in your kitchen at 3am.

* You wrap a towel around your waist at the gym to remove your shorts/jock/boxers.

* You think Fran Dresher is hot.

:Broncos:

Los Broncos
12-05-2009, 11:44 PM
Alcohol, nicotine, sport, and gambling. Good times.

Ramblin' and Gamblin'

carlosgmz1
12-06-2009, 12:03 AM
whats wrong with this again?
I actually do that.... :ouwknow:

yea.... i do that too!! :strong:

BroncoMan4ever
12-07-2009, 09:13 AM
* You get your wife/gf to kill the spider in your kitchen at 3am.

* You wrap a towel around your waist at the gym to remove your shorts/jock/boxers.

* You think Fran Dresher is hot.

:Broncos:

i am sorry, but i would bone the hell out of Fran Dresher, i would just tape her mouth shut so i wouldn't have to hear her voice.

ScottXray
12-07-2009, 09:24 AM
* You think you know football because you kick ass on Madden of any year.
* You dont like Braveheart because its violent.

* You have put on women's clothing for more than a cheap laugh.

* You start a band dedicated to the power of butt rock.

* You went camping but wound up in a hotel room.

* You go to restaurants and ask for skinless, boiled chicken rather than a steak.

:Broncos:

fixed it for you!

SJ Bronco
12-07-2009, 09:27 AM
Who shaves when they're camping?

Pansies. That's who.

What if you shave dry with a bowie knife?

SJ Bronco
12-07-2009, 09:32 AM
- you dont pee in the shower.

- you have never peed on your girlfriend/wife while taking a shower with her.

- you have never given your gf/wife a dutch oven.

- you have never fantasized about putting a weiner dog in a cage with a python.

- you are a raiders/chiefs/chargers/red wings/lakers/cornhuskers fan.

- out of respect, you dont pleasure yourself when your wife/gf is going through "that time of the month."

These two should be shot. F'ing gelding....

SJ Bronco
12-07-2009, 09:34 AM
* You get your wife/gf to kill the spider in your kitchen at 3am.

* You wrap a towel around your waist at the gym to remove your shorts/jock/boxers.

* You think Fran Dresher is hot.

:Broncos:

Damn, Fran Dresher isn't hot?

http://static.pyzam.com/img/funnypics/9/pyzamhitit.jpg

SJ Bronco
12-07-2009, 09:35 AM
i am sorry, but i would bone the hell out of Fran Dresher, i would just tape her mouth shut so i wouldn't have to hear her voice.

Or bury her face in a pillow...:strong:

Beantown Bronco
12-07-2009, 09:36 AM
You put "69" in your OMane username.

SJ Bronco
12-07-2009, 09:37 AM
You put "69" in your OMane username.

Damn, who did that?Hilarious!

SJ Bronco
12-07-2009, 09:38 AM
We need a pole on who would pole her....

http://michaelmanning.tv/blog/uploaded_images/fran-drescher-012-757143.jpg

Jason in LA
12-07-2009, 10:03 AM
Man Law states that a man must give at least a 1 urinal buffer zone between himself and another man, unless the urinals are all in use, then it becomes acceptable to use the urinal next to another man, but it remains man law that you shut the **** up and keep your eyes on your own dick or straight ahead.

I 100% agree and if the stall is open I'll go and use that. Using the urinal next to the other guy is the last resort.

Mr.Meanie
12-07-2009, 10:24 AM
* You manscape when you do not have a reason to (no gf, wife, bf, fb or dont go out for random hookups)


:Broncos:

I think those items in the brackets might be bigger factors in the pansy quotient there...

Tombstone RJ
12-07-2009, 10:25 AM
We need a pole on who would pole her....

http://michaelmanning.tv/blog/uploaded_images/fran-drescher-012-757143.jpg

I'd knock her bottom out...

broncocalijohn
12-07-2009, 11:56 AM
You put "69" in your OMane username.

Damn, who did that?Hilarious!

Bronco Warrior in his MySpace (under age) but our new idiot from yesterday is Dragster69.

gyldenlove
12-07-2009, 12:20 PM
I was the only one in the restroom. I took the urinal at the end, so if anyone ever came in they would have 5 other urinals to go to besides the one NEXT TO ME!!! I mean even if the dude was gay, why in the hell would he create this damn awkwardness by gong to the one NEXT TO ME?

I mean if I walk into a restroom and I see a dude at a urinal at the end I go to THE OTHER END to piss.

And the talking is just so ****ing awkward. Its like dude, Im holding my dick in my hands. Your less than 10 feet away holding your dick in your hands. DONT ****ING TALK TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!


Talking, making eye contact or accidentally touching another man in the washroom or within 5 feet of a washroom will be punishable by death by Greek soldier pulling your heart out through your ass when I come to power.

There is no more antisocial and heinous act, no more unspeakable crime against humanity and reason than not completely ignoring other men in the john.


You are definitely a pansey if:


- You watch any movie that has Julia Roberts in it (for any purpose other than getting obscene amounts of tail).
- You ever cried in a movie theatre.
- Drink Stella Artois - it is the lukewarm urine of satan and all his infernal spawn.
- Can't pull an all nighter without coffee.
- Don't wince when someone is hit in the balls with a hard object, but then imidiately laugh your ass off.
- Have been on a golf course without being drunk.
- You have never gone back to drinking after vomiting copiously due to mild alcohol poisoning.
- You have never considered bashing someones head in on public transport for chewing gum, listening to loud music, smelling, coughing, clearing their throat excessively or being a dick in general.

listopencil
12-07-2009, 12:33 PM
- You have never gone back to drinking after vomiting copiously due to mild alcohol poisoning.


Depends on what you mean by "mild".

listopencil
12-07-2009, 12:46 PM
All right, I'll put in my 2 cents.

Beer:

Yes, some are better than others. Some are stronger than others. But when I really want a beer I'm going to drink whatever I can get because...it's beer.

The Hard Stuff:

Much like beer. I have my preferences (tequila, rum, scotch, vodka) but when it comes down to it I'm going to drink whatever you put in front of me.

Women:

Much like beer. Once again I have my preferences but I'm not that picky. I'm married now but in my single days I certainly wouldn't turn down an offer. Sometimes a twinkle in the eye and a bubble on the hip is all it takes to get my attention...


Hygiene:

Just bathe. Go ahead and put on whatever crap you want afterward, I really couldn't give a **** less. Listen to the ladies. If they like the way you smell then you're good. Just bathe so you don't stink if I have to be around you.


Tobacco:

I smoke. It's legal. I only smoke where I'm supposed to. If you don't like that, **** off.


Guns:

Much like the tobacco. I have a gun. It's legal. I only use it when I'm supposed to. If you don't like that, **** off.

gyldenlove
12-07-2009, 01:12 PM
Depends on what you mean by "mild".

Non-fatal.

gunns
12-07-2009, 01:25 PM
Two women on a string automatically makes you not a pansy

Just a douche. What's better to a guy, not to appear as a pansy to other guys or to be a pansy and the girls swarm you because you're so cute?

BroncoMan4ever
12-07-2009, 01:32 PM
We need a pole on who would pole her....

http://michaelmanning.tv/blog/uploaded_images/fran-drescher-012-757143.jpg

i would pole the hell out of her

worm
12-07-2009, 01:57 PM
Just a douche. What's better to a guy, not to appear as a pansy to other guys or to be a pansy and the girls swarm you because you're so cute?

Seeing Brodie yesterday and that gawdawful haircut...I still can't believe he scored his wife. The guy is as pansy as it gets in the NFL.

If I were him though...I wouldn't mind what the hell others thought of me if I was going home and taggin that.

Hot chicks into you trumps dudes thinking you are a pansy.

Cito Pelon
12-07-2009, 03:07 PM
We need a pole on who would pole her....

http://michaelmanning.tv/blog/uploaded_images/fran-drescher-012-757143.jpg

I'm in.

Cito Pelon
12-07-2009, 03:23 PM
Who shaves when they're camping?

Pansies. That's who.

It's kind of a man thing to always shave when you're camping. Camping isn't an excuse to be a bum. You smarten up all the time.

That's the problem with some campers, they think it's an excuse to be a caveman. Bosheet, when you go outdoors it's not like being a caveman, you carry a coffee cup with shaving lotion and you carry a shaving brush and a razor. The total weight is about 1 pound. Camping is not a reason to act like a bum.

ak1971
12-07-2009, 03:32 PM
Your name is Taco and you run a message board.

gyldenlove
12-07-2009, 04:27 PM
It's kind of a man thing to always shave when you're camping. Camping isn't an excuse to be a bum. You smarten up all the time.

That's the problem with some campers, they think it's an excuse to be a caveman. Bosheet, when you go outdoors it's not like being a caveman, you carry a coffee cup with shaving lotion and you carry a shaving brush and a razor. The total weight is about 1 pound. Camping is not a reason to act like a bum.

You get some of the best rampant coed action when camping if you observe basic hygiene, you will stand out even if you are a fat uggo.

SJ Bronco
12-07-2009, 04:34 PM
You get some of the best rampant coed action when camping if you observe basic hygiene, you will stand out even if you are a fat uggo.

How'd I get dragged in to this ???

Tombstone RJ
12-07-2009, 04:40 PM
It's kind of a man thing to always shave when you're camping. Camping isn't an excuse to be a bum. You smarten up all the time.

That's the problem with some campers, they think it's an excuse to be a caveman. Bosheet, when you go outdoors it's not like being a caveman, you carry a coffee cup with shaving lotion and you carry a shaving brush and a razor. The total weight is about 1 pound. Camping is not a reason to act like a bum.

Again:

Who shaves when their camping?

Pansies. That's who.

SJ Bronco
12-07-2009, 04:43 PM
Again:

Who shaves when their camping?

Pansies. That's who.

No one answered my question, if you shave with a dull field knife, is it still pansey?

Tombstone RJ
12-07-2009, 04:43 PM
Who refuses a bj from a fat chick?:

Pansies. That's who.

Tombstone RJ
12-07-2009, 04:44 PM
No one answered my question, if you shave with a dull field knife, is it still pansey?

Only if your doing it for a hottie. Otherwise, your not impressing anyone.

SJ Bronco
12-07-2009, 04:47 PM
Only if your doing it for a hottie. Otherwise, your not impressing anyone.

I did it cause my facial hair itches and all i had was a fishing knife...

Tombstone RJ
12-07-2009, 04:50 PM
I did it cause my facial hair itches and all i had was a fishing knife...

Shaving won't help if you have fleas or crabs. :sunshine:

SJ Bronco
12-07-2009, 04:54 PM
Shaving won't help if you have fleas or crabs. :sunshine:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crabs

Look under treatments:

Crab lice can be treated with Permethrin 1% cream rinse and pyrethrins. They can be used for this purpose and are the drugs of choice for pregnant or lactating women. These agents should be applied to the affected areas and washed off after 10 minutes. Shaving off or grooming any hair in the affected areas with a fine-toothed comb is necessary to ensure full removal of the dead lice and nits

I don't know what this proves;D

Tombstone RJ
12-07-2009, 04:58 PM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crabs

Look under treatments:



I don't know what this proves;D

I stand correct. :yayaya:

elsid13
12-07-2009, 05:08 PM
Again:

Who shaves when their camping?

Pansies. That's who.

I actually know guys that do, then again they are all military or veterans and it field habit that they haven't got out of. But, field shaving isn't for pansies

Cito Pelon
12-07-2009, 05:19 PM
You get some of the best rampant coed action when camping if you observe basic hygiene, you will stand out even if you are a fat uggo.

Clean scores.

Cito Pelon
12-07-2009, 05:38 PM
;DAgain:

Who shaves when their camping?

Pansies. That's who.

It's a pansy obsession, I've heard it before. I carry a lot of stuff in my backpack, and one pocket is always devoted to a coffee cup, shaving soap, a shaving brush and a razor.

oubronco
12-07-2009, 05:38 PM
Reason you are a pansy

You think Charles was the best RB on the field yesterday

Cito Pelon
12-07-2009, 05:58 PM
No one answered my question, if you shave with a dull field knife, is it still pansey?

No, but it's pretty dumb. And you might get shot, you psycho. Some psycho mother****ing guy shaving with a dull knife shouting gibberish like you do sometimes, well . . . . . .

Cito Pelon
12-07-2009, 06:04 PM
Or maybe I was thinking of Spider . . .

SJ Bronco
12-07-2009, 06:26 PM
No, but it's pretty dumb. And you might get shot, you psycho. Some psycho mother****ing guy shaving with a dull knife shouting gibberish like you do sometimes, well . . . . . .

I don't shout gibberish....at least not sober....:clown:

Tombstone RJ
12-07-2009, 08:21 PM
I actually know guys that do, then again they are all military or veterans and it field habit that they haven't got out of. But, field shaving isn't for pansies

Ok, I'll concede shaving while "camping" and if these soldiers are at a base camp then yah, they probably have to shave.

But there is a big, big, big difference when backpacking/climbing and generally roughing it in bfe rather than sitting at a roadside and camping.

I'm not gonna shave if I'm out in the mountains, backpacking (packing all my crap in one pack and hauling it around). I will brush my teeth and floss, but I ain't gonna shave.

I bet the military guys who are out in the afghan mountains, on a mission (sniping, for instance) ain't shaving. Just a guess on my part.

listopencil
12-07-2009, 09:13 PM
Non-fatal.

OK, then yes.

broncocalijohn
12-07-2009, 09:28 PM
It's kind of a man thing to always shave when you're camping. Camping isn't an excuse to be a bum. You smarten up all the time.

That's the problem with some campers, they think it's an excuse to be a caveman. Bosheet, when you go outdoors it's not like being a caveman, you carry a coffee cup with shaving lotion and you carry a shaving brush and a razor. The total weight is about 1 pound. Camping is not a reason to act like a bum.

You dont need to be a caveman, just let it grow for the few days you are out and about. Keeps your face warm too. Sorry, but you can excuse it all you want but you are a pansy camper.

Bronco Yoda
12-07-2009, 10:24 PM
*Your adopt a Bronco is a 4th string bench warmer

bronco610
12-07-2009, 10:58 PM
:wave:I only shave with water every day. Shaving lotion or foam is for p***Y's.

Cito Pelon
12-08-2009, 12:03 AM
You dont need to be a caveman, just let it grow for the few days you are out and about. Keeps your face warm too. Sorry, but you can excuse it all you want but you are a pansy camper.

My dog goes natural, I stay civilized as much as I can. It's not real hard to shave and wash every morning, even if the water is cold.

Cito Pelon
12-08-2009, 12:36 AM
:wave:I only shave with water every day. Shaving lotion or foam is for p***Y's.

Unless you have a neckbeard. What, you have one hair per square inch?

watermock
12-08-2009, 12:37 AM
Your a p***Y if you don't leave the cell in the car.

broncocalijohn
12-08-2009, 12:38 AM
Your a p***Y if you don't leave the cell in the car.

how can you order pizza if you leave the celly in the car? Dominoes needs to know what tent you are in too.

Blart
12-08-2009, 01:15 AM
* You married the first girl you ever had sex with


Girl?

* You don't wear your teams jersey at the sports bar for fear of conflict

I'm the only one at my bar with a non-ironic jersey!

* You're afraid to play a game of pick up basketball because you might be on the "no shirts" side

I work out every day at Gold's Gym, and the bar across the street has binoculars that peer into the big windows here, so I'm always ready to show off.

* You order fruit flavored cocktails instead of beer or whiskey when at the bar

Yuck! Martinis only, please.

* You prefer movies with Philip Seymour Hoffman over Clint Eastwood

Clint Eastwood is WAY better eye candy.

* Your girlfriend has alot of male friends

Not a problem!

* You NEVER look over at a car pulling up to the traffic light next to you

When I'm in a car, I'm always checking out the guys next to me.

* You've been to the opera

I'm more of a Ballet guy

* You call road side assistance when you have a flat tire

I take the subway, cars are pointless and bad for the environment!

* You can't bench your own body weight

Easy peasy, again, everyone works out here. It's a must.


0/10. Manly man man man

carlosgmz1
12-08-2009, 01:44 AM
Girl?



I'm the only one at my bar with a non-ironic jersey!



I work out every day at Gold's Gym, and the bar across the street has binoculars that peer into the big windows here, so I'm always ready to show off.



Yuck! Martinis only, please.



Clint Eastwood is WAY better eye candy.



Girl?



When I'm in a car, I'm always checking out the guys next to me.



I'm more of a Ballet guy



I take the subway, cars are pointless and bad for the environment!



Easy peasy, again, everyone works out here. It's a must.


0/10. Manly man man man

are you being serious?!?! LOL

BroncoDoug
12-08-2009, 02:04 AM
are you being serious?!?! LOL

obviously you are new....

Archer81
12-08-2009, 02:07 AM
obviously you are new....


+ 1.



:Broncos:

ZONA
12-08-2009, 02:19 AM
Your a p***Y if you don't leave the cell in the car.

Not true, a cell saved my life. I went out 4 wheelin in summer down here by myself once (stupid, I know) and it was late May and was about 110 degrees and I got my rig high centered. Walked for about 8 hours and by that time I was really hurting bad, out of water and no food, way back in the middle of nowhere. I brought water but after hours of walking I fell and bust open the container and there went my water. The only food I had was a banana and I ate that earlier and then later I was so hungry and had no energy, I ate the peel. I had hardly any juice in my cell but enough to make one call. I had no service all day until the end I finally got some and called Sheriffs Dept and they sent help. Found me laying dehydrated under a bush late that night. I never go in the hills alone anymore and certainly would NEVER EVER leave my cell at home or in the car.

elsid13
12-08-2009, 02:51 AM
Ok, I'll concede shaving while "camping" and if these soldiers are at a base camp then yah, they probably have to shave.

But there is a big, big, big difference when backpacking/climbing and generally roughing it in bfe rather than sitting at a roadside and camping.

I'm not gonna shave if I'm out in the mountains, backpacking (packing all my crap in one pack and hauling it around). I will brush my teeth and floss, but I ain't gonna shave.

I bet the military guys who are out in the afghan mountains, on a mission (sniping, for instance) ain't shaving. Just a guess on my part.

The regular grunts are, the SF don't. Military shave to ensure the NBC hood fit correctly and for discipline reasons

SJ Bronco
12-08-2009, 09:37 AM
Not everyone in SF works out. They still wear the buttless chaps though...

broncocalijohn
12-08-2009, 12:04 PM
I think we need to add another pansy thing.
If you go to TMZ to get your news, you probably are a pansy.
If you then start a thread admitting it, you are a pansy.
http://www.orangemane.com/BB/showthread.php?t=87413

Bronco Yoda
12-08-2009, 12:25 PM
No one answered my question, if you shave with a dull field knife, is it still pansey?


According to man-law #675... Shaving with a flint stone is preferred but a jagged lid from an open tin can lid can be substituted in dire situations.

A shaving brush is allowed to paint your toe nails. Wtf....that can't be right.... Blarts been scribbling in our bible again... Shiat!

Archer81
12-08-2009, 12:32 PM
Not everyone in SF works out. They still wear the buttless chaps though...


Wearing chaps contrary to the reason they are used has been codified as pansiness.


:Broncos:

Archer81
12-08-2009, 12:33 PM
According to man-law #675... Shaving with a flint stone is preferred but a jagged lid from an open tin can lid can be substituted in dire situations.

A shaving brush is allowed to paint your toe nails. Wtf....that can't be right.... Blarts been scribbling in our bible again... Shiat!


Scribbling in the mancode bible is a form of pansiness, and well as blasphemous.


:Broncos:

Bronco Yoda
12-08-2009, 12:44 PM
Wearing chaps contrary to the reason they are used has been codified as pansiness.


:Broncos:

obligatory chaps shot
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v30/netizen/Bronco%20Avs/sexy_cowgirls_jpg.jpg

BroncoMan4ever
12-08-2009, 01:08 PM
obligatory chaps shot
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v30/netizen/Bronco%20Avs/sexy_cowgirls_jpg.jpg

what were we talking about in this thread? my mind just went blank

BroncoMan4ever
12-08-2009, 01:09 PM
if you can't watch certain movies because they are too violent, or show too much nudity, you are definitely a pansy

Archer81
12-08-2009, 02:54 PM
what were we talking about in this thread? my mind just went blank


http://tinyurl.com/lyxjr5


:Broncos:

ZONA
12-08-2009, 03:00 PM
You're a pansy if you heard McD cussing out the Broncos bench a few weeks ago and were upset or offended when you heard MF over the air.

Tombstone RJ
12-08-2009, 03:45 PM
Your a p***Y if you don't leave the cell in the car.

* Your a pansy if you named your kitty Beelzebub

elsid13
12-08-2009, 04:08 PM
http://tinyurl.com/lyxjr5


:Broncos:

Spider ~ I hit it.

ZONA
12-08-2009, 04:10 PM
Spider ~ I hit it.

I thought the arm band tats were a 90's thing.

SJ Bronco
12-08-2009, 04:44 PM
I thought the arm band tats were a 90's thing.

it was. It was pretty high on the douche bag list. Kinda like sleeveless affliction t shirts are now.:poke:

BroncoMan4ever
12-08-2009, 10:19 PM
http://tinyurl.com/lyxjr5


:Broncos:

Dude in the picture asks, "does this hat make me look gay?"

carlosgmz1
12-09-2009, 02:31 AM
obviously you are new....

yea... so he was serious?!

OABB
12-09-2009, 08:30 AM
yea... so he was serious?!

Yes. The mane is an open community. Blart, lex and a few others here are openly gay. Blart is super big gay al gay and lex is a power bottom who is self loathing and into small animals. It's all cool here on the mane. Welcome and keep posting.

Tombstone RJ
12-09-2009, 08:36 AM
Yes. The mane is an open community. Blart, lex and a few others here are openly gay. Blart is super big gay al gay and lex is a power bottom who is self loathing and into small animals. It's all cool here on the mane. Welcome and keep posting.

Correction, it's an open community if you know football. If your a moron than the community tends to tell you you're a moron.

BroncoDoug
12-09-2009, 09:45 AM
Yes. The mane is an open community. Blart, lex and a few others here are openly gay. Blart is super big gay al gay and lex is a power bottom who is self loathing and into small animals. It's all cool here on the mane. Welcome and keep posting.

what he said...

SJ Bronco
12-09-2009, 10:12 AM
Yes. The mane is an open community. Blart, lex and a few others here are openly gay. Blart is super big gay al gay and lex is a power bottom who is self loathing and into small animals. It's all cool here on the mane. Welcome and keep posting.

he's in to big animals too :thanku:

broncocalijohn
12-09-2009, 10:35 AM
he's in to big animals too :thanku:

yes, but after they laughed at Lex's little wee wee, he went back to rabbits, guinea pigs, gerbils, hamsters but after they also laughed, he went to polly woggs and flies.

Archer81
12-09-2009, 11:39 AM
Yes. The mane is an open community. Blart, lex and a few others here are openly gay. Blart is super big gay al gay and lex is a power bottom who is self loathing and into small animals. It's all cool here on the mane. Welcome and keep posting.


Their thuper, thanks for asthking.


:Broncos:

gyldenlove
12-09-2009, 11:44 AM
yes, but after they laughed at Lex's little wee wee, he went back to rabbits, guinea pigs, gerbils, hamsters but after they also laughed, he went to polly woggs and flies.

I have a good one about guinea pigs, gerbils and hamsters, but it might make people sick.


F people.


Q: Why should always tape up your hamster/gerbil/guinea pig?

A: It will explode on penetration if you don't.

carlosgmz1
12-11-2009, 01:29 AM
I have a good one about guinea pigs, gerbils and hamsters, but it might make people sick.


F people.


Q: Why should always tape up your hamster/gerbil/guinea pig?

A: It will explode on penetration if you don't.

:spit: hahaha ROFL!

that was pretty gross though lol

SJ Bronco
12-11-2009, 09:25 AM
I have a good one about guinea pigs, gerbils and hamsters, but it might make people sick.


F people.


Q: Why should always tape up your hamster/gerbil/guinea pig?

A: It will explode on penetration if you don't.

Hilarious!Hilarious!Hilarious!Hilarious!Hilarious!

I'm a sick F for laughing at that