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View Full Version : Why your teams sucks: Chicago Bears edition


Peoples Champ
08-26-2009, 11:14 AM
I figured I would post this, in tribute to the Bears coming to Mile High this weekend.

http://deadspin.com/5346047/why-your-team-sucks-chicago-bears

TheElusiveKyleOrton
08-26-2009, 11:15 AM
I was wondering when this would be posted.

Prepare yourself for the "get over it!" shouts from the Cutler nuthuggers.

Peoples Champ
08-26-2009, 11:19 AM
I was wondering when this would be posted.

Prepare yourself for the "get over it!" shouts from the Cutler nuthuggers.


Ya, this is about the Bears, I would do it to any team we are playing in the current football week.

TonyR
08-26-2009, 11:27 AM
I've said this about Cutler many, many times myself:

He's also maddeningly inconsistent. For every brilliant performance Cutler gave last year, he turned in an equally turnoverriffic choke job, particularly during the Broncos' now infamous three-game losing streak to close out the 2008 season in which he tossed four interceptions and averaged a passer rating of 73.9. And that was when he had GOOD receivers to work with.

And why am I just hearing the name "Frown Cannon" for the first time?

I keep asking Fatsis to go on the record with tales of the Frown Cannon's legendary dickishness.

Rulon Velvet Jones
08-26-2009, 11:29 AM
Cutler****er and Marmalard are Magary's nicknames for both Cutler and Rivers. They roll off the tongue quite well.

Irish Stout
08-26-2009, 11:30 AM
That was hilarious!

TheReverend
08-26-2009, 11:32 AM
These two parts had me rolling:

"Look, that was a fine team, even if they played in an era where someone like Mike Ditka could somehow manage to outcoach other people."

"1. Jerry Angelo's draft record:

2005—Cedric Benson (1), Mark Bradley (2) (next pick was Kyle Orton in the 4th round—best draft ever?)"

Inkana7
08-26-2009, 11:34 AM
The Frown Cannon. That's awesome.

~Crash~
08-26-2009, 11:35 AM
wow I was really impressed with the part that the o-line quit blocking for Cutler nice read ..... oh my blinders at full tilt... and the ****s really showed such nice journalism

Peoples Champ
08-26-2009, 11:36 AM
These two parts had me rolling:

"Look, that was a fine team, even if they played in an era where someone like Mike Ditka could somehow manage to outcoach other people."

"1. Jerry Angelo's draft record:

2005óCedric Benson (1), Mark Bradley (2) (next pick was Kyle Orton in the 4th roundóbest draft ever?)"



I liked when he said that every time KC wins a game, they dont go saying, here comes the 69 Chiefs, just like Bears fans do with the 1985 bears.

Irish Stout
08-26-2009, 11:44 AM
wow I was really impressed with the part that the o-line quit blocking for Cutler nice read ..... oh my blinders at full tilt... and the ****s really showed such nice journalism

Yeah journalism.... uhhh... thats not journalism and the author knows it. It is an editorial.

Peoples Champ
08-26-2009, 11:44 AM
Yeah journalism.... uhhh... thats not journalism and the author knows it. It is an editorial.


I would say more of a blog

Smiling Assassin27
08-26-2009, 11:48 AM
Jay Cutler is an emo-banged ********** who makes his teammates want to rape him with a rake.

When are we getting our sigs back??

Atlas
08-26-2009, 11:52 AM
I was wondering when this would be posted.

Prepare yourself for the "get over it!" shouts from the Cutler nuthuggers.

I guess that is about the same as you being a McD Jizz Swallower. So how does it taste?

Flex Gunmetal
08-26-2009, 12:03 PM
wow I was really impressed with the part that the o-line quit blocking for Cutler nice read ..... oh my blinders at full tilt... and the ****s really showed such nice journalism

Good point, clown!

TheReverend
08-26-2009, 12:16 PM
Good point, clown!

Oh, hi. How are you?

Flex Gunmetal
08-26-2009, 12:18 PM
Oh, hi. How are you?

So hot right now.

TheReverend
08-26-2009, 12:22 PM
So hot right now.

Go on.





http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/dd202/neelb24/Fapping.gif

TheElusiveKyleOrton
08-26-2009, 12:24 PM
I guess that is about the same as you being a McD Jizz Swallower. So how does it taste?

You're right. It must be swallowing jizz to actually wait until the season starts to begin calling for his head. How silly of me!

thanks for clearing that up, Atlas. Don't know what we'd do without your guidance in such important matters. /rolleyes

TheDave
08-26-2009, 12:40 PM
**** that noise. Let's lay it bare. Jay Cutler (http://deadspin.com/tag/jay-cutler/) is an emo-banged ********** who makes his teammates want to rape him with a rake. You don't have to like your QB to win a championship. But you do have to actively not want to stop blocking for him so that he'll get a massive spinal cord injury and then be airlifted back to Indiana and left for dead. That's key.


Dude has some anger issues... Funny... but if I was his kids/wife/man friend, I'd sleep with one eye open.

Flex Gunmetal
08-26-2009, 12:41 PM
Go on.





http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/dd202/neelb24/Fapping.gif

I raise you a gif of crash re-enacting his failure in this thread.
http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e369/Stefangs/Fatty_falls.gif

TheReverend
08-26-2009, 12:44 PM
I raise you a gif of crash re-enacting his failure in this thread.
http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e369/Stefangs/Fatty_falls.gif

Love that show.

But seriously, this article cannot be saved by anything.

Only one thing can save this thread from pages of circular arguing about months old topics...

THIS THREAD IS N0W AB0UT HAMSTERS

http://ibexinc.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/hamster.jpg
http://www.funnybeez.com/funnypictures/armed-baby-hamster.jpg
http://www.yesthisbig.com/img/avatars/Deb/hamster.jpg

Punisher
08-26-2009, 12:52 PM
http://newmedia.funnyjunk.com/gifs/chuck_norris_vs_oar.gif

Pontius Pirate
08-26-2009, 01:24 PM
http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/01/funny-pictures-hamster-toilet-paper-roll.jpg