View Full Version : Revenge of the Ghosts

05-15-2009, 10:16 AM
My One Year old just Fell down on the coffee table and split her head open. I was at work my wife called and said "Do You think it needs stitches?" Not seeing it I just said. If you have to ask it probably does not. Just put a couple of those closer band aids on it. Well we did not have any of the proper band aids and she was on the way to work. She drops her off at daycare with a band aid holding it closed. Daycare lady is cool and says she will get the proper band aids. Her mom looks at it and kind of freaks out, And then the Pharmacy people freak out. So she calls my wife back freaking out and now My wife is Freaking out.

All because slimmer pushed her down.

05-15-2009, 10:20 AM
Good thread!!!!!!!

05-15-2009, 10:22 AM

05-15-2009, 10:33 AM
That's what happens when you cross the streams ..... Eggon told you not too.

Beantown Bronco
05-15-2009, 10:35 AM
My One Year old just Fell down on the coffee table and split her head open.

It wasn't the coffee table. It was my little boy. Apparently, I shouldn't have let him watch Heroes. He can't tell the difference between fiction and reality and thinks he's Sylar now. ;)

05-15-2009, 10:38 AM
Well your kid thinks he is syler. My son knows how to punch like Chuck Liddell. We should book a play date.

05-15-2009, 10:56 AM
What the **** is going on with this place? We need a separate stream of consciousness forum.

Jason in LA
05-15-2009, 11:03 AM
Blame it on those people who let your kid watch Ghostbusters. What the hell were they thinking? You should call child services on them. ;D

05-15-2009, 11:15 AM
When we lived in Wetmore, Colo the house was haunted. Got so bad we considered taking our animals to the pound because they went off their rocker. When we moved, they went back to normal. Crazy stuff.


05-15-2009, 11:33 AM
They glued it shut. No stitches. They said this will leave less scarring. She took it like a champ.

05-15-2009, 12:41 PM
My rule of thumb has always been... if you think the child even might need to see the doctor, you go to the doctor (better to be safe than to be sorry and it's a relief to be told it's all gonna be OK).

05-15-2009, 12:45 PM
My ghost story. Sorry for the length (that's not what she said!)

A little while ago I was staying in the castle hotel in Conwy, Wales. It stands on the site of a former Cistercian abbey and is now a 15th century Inn. It's a very atmospheric place, very old with low beams and tight corridors. Anyway, I had dinner there and the owner joined me after dinner with the chef for a few drinks. They told me that the place was haunted by a 'mad monk'. Aren't they all says I. But with a deathly serious face the owner tells me that it's causing them real problems, that people aren't coming back because they are frightened. Apparently during the black death of the 13th century, the abbey closed it's doors to the outside as the disease took hold. This particular monk arrived back from a trip to another abbey to find that, such was the fear of the black death, they would not re-open the gates to re-admit him. So he was left to take his chances in the village. Anyway, to cut a long story short, he contracts the plague and spends his last days, watched by the monks in the abbey, in screaming agony and dementia, at the walls of the abbey praying to God and warning the monks that he would see them burn in hell. After he died the sightings began and people who claimed to have seen him, so the legend goes, died an agonising death, not unlike the plague. Anyway these guys tell me that customers are saying they are seeing this character and that bookings are down. Nice wind-up thinks I as I head to bed, but can't help but think I'm a touch nervous. Anyway, during the night I suddenly woke up with the feeling my heart had stopped beating. A truly horrible experience. Adrenaline was absolutely racing around my body. I decided to go out on to the landing, the room was incredibly hot, to get some fresh air. As soon as I am alone on the landing this glow appears at the end of the corridor, it starts quite small and then suddenly bursts into the shape of this monk and comes, no word of a lie, charging towards me with his mouth open in a screaming fashion and passes right f**king through me. I am screaming like a f**king baby I can tell you. People now come running out of their rooms and ask what happened. I tell them and explain that I am getting the f**k out of there and I would advise them to do the same. Anyway, this nerdy looking chick starts poking around and says she's not so sure. I wanted to get out ASAP, but she and her friends convinced me to stay another night. I'm pretty loathe, but to be honest she had a cute mate and she didn't seem attached, so I thought what the hell. Frankly I've got the black death already if that's the way it is. So we wait until dark again. I wasn't really up for seeing it again and nor was one her friends, so me and him and his dog went to the kitchen to wait it out and, frankly, eat ourselves stupid. I think the ghost must has sensed me from our previous encounter, as he suddenly appeared. We ran like f**k, no looking back. At one point the other bloke was flying along on a trolley being pushed by his dog. It was crazy. We couldn't get away from the horror. Open a door and there he was. At one point I was hiding behind a curtain in the dark and thought I was holding the other blokes arm, turns out it's the monk. Fortunately, we found some chefs outfits and dressed up to fool the ghost that we were chefs cooking him a great meal. The other guy put a bow tie on his dog and got him to pretend to be a waiter. It bought us the time we needed and we got away. His 3 friends never even saw the ghost, but when we met up, the nerdy one said she was confident she could stop the hauntings. The other bloke (couldn't be sure now if he was shagging the cute chick) came up with some ridiculous f**king idea involving pulleys and tablecloths tied together. ****. The cute one suggests me, the kitchen dude and the dog attract the monk and then run, luring the ghost into the 'trap'. Thanks a f**king lot I say, but in the interests of a chance shag I agree. Bizarrely, the other bloke agrees to risk his life for a dog snack, which combined with his penchant for talking to his Great Dane, doesn't exactly inspire me with confidence for my future. Anyway, to cut a long story short, after some bizarre f**king escapades involving glue, pulleys, the dog stuck in a spinning wheelie bin with the monk and the f**king whole ridiculous plan going tits up spectacularly, it finally ends with me, the dog food eating guy, the dog and the monk all trapped inside a chandelier (don't ask). It turns out it was the chef dressing up as a monk, with some help from special effects projection. Apparently he wanted to buy the sh*thole at a reduced price or something. I never got a sniff of the hot one either, though I think the nerdy was up for it.

Crazy, but true.

Beantown Bronco
05-15-2009, 01:03 PM
My rule of thumb has always been... if you think the child even might need to see the doctor, you go to the doctor (better to be safe than to be sorry and it's a relief to be told it's all gonna be OK).

Nah. Rub a little dirt on it.

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/6c9C__nze5g&hl=en&fs=1&rel=0"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/6c9C__nze5g&hl=en&fs=1&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

05-15-2009, 01:09 PM
My rule of thumb has always been... if you think the child even might need to see the doctor, you go to the doctor (better to be safe than to be sorry and it's a relief to be told it's all gonna be OK).

My rule of thumb is If you have to ask than you don't need to go to the dr. That said we have been to the stinking Dr ie Emergicare 4-5 times in the last year.

05-15-2009, 01:12 PM
A bunch of my friends were out late one night and saw the Ghost of my Father, I waited with them the next night and he spoke to me, told me to avenge his death at the hands of his brother who married my mom after he had only been dead a short while.

I got this great idea to put on a play dipicting a brother killing his brother and marrying his wife.

This ended badly, lots of swords and poison...Oh and I forgot that my girlfriend went mad because I was pretending to be insane. I also killed her dad on accident.

Long story.

05-15-2009, 01:30 PM
Nah. Rub a little dirt on it.

Rubbing a little dirt on it would work if it was me.... but any one of my kids is a whole 'nother ballgame. :yayaya: