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View Full Version : Kiper has proven himself to be dumber than i thought he was


BroncoMan4ever
04-20-2009, 10:21 PM
On tonights NFL Live, which I am very sorry I watched. He compared Jason Smith to Ryan Clady. That isn't the bad part, because Smith is the best LT in the draft. However he went off on his usual tangent on how the Lions should draft Stafford since he is the best QB in the draft, not necessarily the best player but the best QB. When McShay told him that they might go after Smith instead of Stafford, Kiper showed his true lack of knowledge on the game.

"Jason Smith compares to Ryan Clady who is not a top LT." his exact words.

what other LT in the league last season allowed only half a sack? i would love to hear him say who had a better season at the LT position than Clady did last season, because it will be bull****.

the best LT are judged by how good they are at keeping their QB's blind side protected. he did it better than everyone else, but because of not being noticed for the Pro Bowl, he is not a top LT in Kiper's mind.

Dudeskey
04-20-2009, 10:28 PM
God, how can ESPN continue to prop this ****er up?™

NFLBRONCO
04-20-2009, 10:31 PM
On tonights NFL Live, which I am very sorry I watched. He compared Jason Smith to Ryan Clady. That isn't the bad part, because Smith is the best LT in the draft. However he went off on his usual tangent on how the Lions should draft Stafford since he is the best QB in the draft, not necessarily the best player but the best QB. When McShay told him that they might go after Smith instead of Stafford, Kiper showed his true lack of knowledge on the game.

"Jason Smith compares to Ryan Clady who is not a top LT." his exact words.

what other LT in the league last season allowed only half a sack? i would love to hear him say who had a better season at the LT position than Clady did last season, because it will be bull****.

the best LT are judged by how good they are at keeping their QB's blind side protected. he did it better than everyone else, but because of not being noticed for the Pro Bowl, he is not a top LT in Kiper's mind.

No doubt Kiper is a tard.

Natedog24
04-20-2009, 10:38 PM
Oh my wow, Kiper's said some pretty dumb things in the past but wow. That was dumb even by his illustrious standards.

spdirty
04-20-2009, 10:41 PM
Well, its Mr. "Cassel is an improvement over Cutler" Kiper. I'd expect nothing less from him.

BTW, anyone know what his credentials ever were to get him the gig on E!SPN in the first place?

BroncoMan4ever
04-20-2009, 10:55 PM
at first he compares Smith to Clady and i am thinking damn that is a great compliment for that guy, and i am thinking ok maybe Kiper isn't a complete retard, just a slight retard and then he says about 10 seconds later that Clady isn't a top LT, and i was right back to wondering how a guy that stupid is capable of waking up in the morning getting dressed and getting to work without hurting himself

Dudeskey
04-20-2009, 11:03 PM
Well, its Mr. "Cassel is an improvement over Cutler" Kiper. I'd expect nothing less from him.

BTW, anyone know what his credentials ever were to get him the gig on E!SPN in the first place?

I dunno, but I like the entry on the Dickipedia, lol

http://www.dickipedia.org/dick.php?title=Mel_Kiper%2C_Jr.

Mel Kiper, Jr. (born July 25, 1960) is an ESPN analyst for the NFL draft, huge football nerd, and a dick. Since 1984, he has been a staple of ESPN's annual draft coverage, which begins in May and extends through the following April.

While ESPN has a storied history of launching the careers of irritating commentators, Kiper is surely in the upper echelon. His achievements include appearing at 24 consecutive drafts and somehow interrupting every single ESPN show ever to air. He is the most recognizable dick in conjunction with the NFL draft.

It is important to note that, in regards to football, Kiper does not have actual coaching or playing experience, and has been able to designate himself an expert simply by saying so, loudly, many times, without anyone questioning it. This is standard dick behavior.

Early life

While attending Essex Community College in Baltimore, Kiper decided to become the kind of dick that runs an obnoxious business while they are in school. Thus, he founded Kiper Enterprises, a modestly named draft information company. While this business was less dickish than, say, stealing an idea for a future million dollar corporation and claiming the idea was your own, it is still more obnoxious than selling "Major League Beer Pong" T-shirts to freshmen.

The big board

One of Kiper's most memorable contributions to the NFL draft is the "big board," a large chart on which he analyzes the order in which players should be drafted based on incomprehensible, vaguely relevant statistics only Kiper understands (also known as “statis-*****”). Prior to the big board’s appearance on internet, Kiper would physically attach players names to a large white board with dollops of excess hair gel.

Kiper was the first commentator to begin analyzing players in terms of their "draft stock." In his quest to maintain the attention of his loud obnoxious enthusiastic fanbase, Kiper invented a system whereby a player’s “stock” rises and falls based on a variety of factors in the months leading up to the draft. These pre-draft months make up the optimal time for analyzing performance because talent scouts can focus on players’ public and private workouts rather than being distracted by the athletes’ other, less predictive activities, such as playing in football games.

Coach favorite

Many coaches and administrators enjoy hearing suggestions from Kiper. One big fan was Indianapolis Colts manager Bill Tobin who praised Kiper saying, "Who in the hell is Mel Kiper, anyway? I mean, here's a guy who criticizes everybody, whoever they take. In my knowledge of him, he's never even put on a jockstrap, he's never been a player, he's never been a coach, he's never been a scout, he's never been an administrator, and all of a sudden, he's an expert. Mel Kiper has no more credentials to do what he's doing than my neighbor, and my neighbor's a postman and he doesn't even have season tickets to the NFL."

Proof of genius

Though a dick, Mel Kiper is an infallible genius when it comes to scouting future NFL talent.

* He once snidely remarked of the Colts, "That's why [they] keep picking number two every year," after their 1994 second overall selection. Kiper was widely critical of the Colts’ pick that year, Marshall Faulk, who turned out to be such a bust that he is expected to be inducted into the NFL Hall of Fame in the near future.

* In 2005, Kiper praised 8th overall selection, wide receiver Mike Williams, saying, "I'll see you at his Hall of Fame induction." Many people have yet to fully recognize the abilities Kiper saw in Williams. These people include coaches, fans, analysts, referees, the players on the teams he played for and against, and anyone else who has seen him in a football jersey. Williams’ journey to the Hall of Fame suffered a slight detour in 2007 when he stopped playing football and no one wanted to sign him.

* In 1999, he touted the potential of Oregon quarterback Akili Smith to exceed at the professional level. Fans have high hopes for Smith to have a great season this year and to make a big statement in his league.

* In 1998, Kiper argued that Ryan Leaf, 2nd overall pick, had an attitude that would be an asset in the NFL. He has since become one of professional football's most notable quarterbacks.

* In 2001, Kiper predicted a dismal 0-16 season for the New England Patriots. The team finished slightly better than that prediction, managing to win just one Super Bowl the entire season.


Effect on fan culture

Kiper's rapid and notable rise to prominence is directly proportional to the growth of the internet. While pre-internet, sports news consisted merely of the handful of things that could be covered on ESPN and the New York Post, the development of sports websites and the internet's growing popularity led to a heightened demand for constant sports updates, most of which were increasingly irrelevant and served less to advance the sport and entertain fans and more to simply fill up ESPN Insider with content. Kiper was integral in this shift towards totally unnecessary reporting.

Through nonstop comprehensive coverage via articles and elaborate lists and charts, Kiper has managed to make great contributions to the incredible surplus of unimportant sports information on the web. In doing so, he has created a culture of ultra-zealous football fans that, to an uncomfortable degree, track and follow every tidbit of this information. While this development has allowed some fans greater access to information about their favorite players and teams, it has distracted many others from certain basic human activities, such as art, hygiene, and knowing how to talk to people without annoying them.

Hair

While cultural anthropologists have yet to prove that one’s hair is capable of being a dick in and of itself, it is thought that Kiper’s hair will be the first to hold the honor.

Pseudofool
04-20-2009, 11:04 PM
He's a weirdo. He's like some religious-inspired sales man, garish and pathetic.

cutthemdown
04-21-2009, 12:10 AM
On tonights NFL Live, which I am very sorry I watched. He compared Jason Smith to Ryan Clady. That isn't the bad part, because Smith is the best LT in the draft. However he went off on his usual tangent on how the Lions should draft Stafford since he is the best QB in the draft, not necessarily the best player but the best QB. When McShay told him that they might go after Smith instead of Stafford, Kiper showed his true lack of knowledge on the game.

"Jason Smith compares to Ryan Clady who is not a top LT." his exact words.

what other LT in the league last season allowed only half a sack? i would love to hear him say who had a better season at the LT position than Clady did last season, because it will be bull****.

the best LT are judged by how good they are at keeping their QB's blind side protected. he did it better than everyone else, but because of not being noticed for the Pro Bowl, he is not a top LT in Kiper's mind.

I disagree LT also have to be good in the run game be to be truly elite. Plus I saw plenty of plays last yr where it was Cutlers feet that saved olineman from sacks.

Clady has room to improve. He's still not close to the run blocker Gary Zimmerman was. If he works hard he may get that good but he needs to get a little stronger. His long arms save him in the pass blocking but he has yet to really get nasty in the run game.

Give Clady 2-3 yrs in an NFL style lifting and workout program and he may truly start to dominate.

I think for Clady to get the respect of the other players and coaches he will have to dominate more in the run game as well as keep QB protected.

He's good though, just maybe not as good yet as the board makes him out to be.

Harris IMO a little better run blocker with Kuper next to him, then Clady and Hamilton are doing on the other side.

OBF1
04-21-2009, 12:24 AM
Just one of the many reasons I watch the NFL channel on draft day.

Popps
04-21-2009, 12:35 AM
If Clady would have been taken in the top 5, he would have been a Pro Bowl lock by mid-season. His rookie season was nothing short of phenomenal. Not a top tackle? Good lord.

I'll call out weakness on the Broncos when I see it, but that's some real bull****. Clady is an elite LT. Baring any sort of sophomore slump, he'll be in the Pro Bowl where he belongs, next year.

Jay Cutler had no idea how good he had it.

footstepsfrom#27
04-21-2009, 12:48 AM
Yeah...he's definitely a nitwit...also easily evidenced by his view of Cutler as well. Of course he has plenty of company on this board now so his popularity here should be on the rise, Clady comments or not.

Freakish looking dude too...

http://thesportshernia.typepad.com/.a/6a00d83451b84f69e201156e7601e3970c-550wi

TheChamp24
04-21-2009, 12:55 AM
I do agree with some people's remarks, what makes Kiper an expert?

footstepsfrom#27
04-21-2009, 01:14 AM
I do agree with some people's remarks, what makes Kiper an expert?
Marketing

Broncoman13
04-21-2009, 04:16 AM
I don't know about Clady's run blocking being his downside. He improved by leaps and bounds over the stretch of 16 games. If he continues to improve that quickly he'll be all-pro this year. By season's end, I imagine he will be a dominating force in the run game as well. Either way, you have to consider that Harris will get more practice b/c of playing the right side, which has always been the players and coaches preference to run to the right.

loborugger
04-21-2009, 05:12 AM
http://thesportshernia.typepad.com/.a/6a00d83451b84f69e201156e7601e3970c-550wi

The dude on the right has the same look I have when Kiper comes on the TV. Fortunately, I can change the channel, leave the room, or - God forbid - turn the TV off.

colonelbeef
04-21-2009, 05:50 AM
If Clady would have been taken in the top 5, he would have been a Pro Bowl lock by mid-season. His rookie season was nothing short of phenomenal. Not a top tackle? Good lord.

I'll call out weakness on the Broncos when I see it, but that's some real bull****. Clady is an elite LT. Baring any sort of sophomore slump, he'll be in the Pro Bowl where he belongs, next year.

Jay Cutler had no idea how good he had it.

he did play with Clady the year before, and at times was running for his life with Lepsis a total nonfactor. At Vandy he was consistently forced to improvise after the line broke down. I bet he knows exactly how good he had it last season @ LT. Can;t base your decisions on another player on your team in the NFL, that same guy you made your decision around might bail out in a few years himself, or blow out his knee tomorrow

Rohirrim
04-21-2009, 05:55 AM
If I had to guess right now I would say that Stafford will be a back-up on some team five years from now and Jason Smith will be a starting LT for 12 years. Who's the better pick? It's obvious to me, anyway. Kiper should take a hint from Madden. What's leaking out of many FOs is that most teams think Sanchez is a better QB than Stafford. He can make all the throws and he exudes confidence. Much stronger interviews everywhere he went. If the Lions do the smart thing and take Smith, Stafford drops like a rock.

cmhargrove
04-21-2009, 06:10 AM
It will be pretty funny if Simms wins the starting job, and Ryan Harris becomes our new blindside OT. It's a good thing he panned out also....

Dukes
04-21-2009, 06:34 AM
Thank God I get NFLN and can watch Mike Mayock instead of those two douches

Beantown Bronco
04-21-2009, 06:39 AM
he did play with Clady the year before

?

Tankgunner95
04-21-2009, 06:40 AM
Well i went on a rant last time we talked abou that TARD, so since another poster stated I wanted to be in a snuggie with him. I will let it be known, I cant stand that Mother*******. I still dont know how he got in his position as a so called expert. I think if he misses a pick he goes on and on about why the team should have picked the player he wanted because it always a better match his way.

barryr
04-21-2009, 06:43 AM
Kiper doesn't know the players once they leave college for the NFL. I bet he hasn't even seen one clip of Clady as a Denver Bronco. He focuses more on the college players, so why they ask him what this NFL team needs or that one is beyond me.

want2bAbronco2
04-21-2009, 06:47 AM
Kiper? Never heard of him. Does he work at Circus Circus? Looks like a clown.

socalorado
04-21-2009, 06:52 AM
http://www.laddymcfaddy.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/kiper.jpg