Popps
09-08-2008, 11:51 PM
AP Monday, September 8 2008
11:30 pm Pacific ST
Story by Pete Goesinya
Associated Press Writer
OAKLAND (AP) - Sporting events mark the passing of time in ways almost as consistent as the calendars they're written upon. Whether it's the first crack of the bat in Spring Training, breakfast at Wimbledon or the firing of the gun at the Kentucky Derby, sports illuminate the passage of time as artistically as the turning seasons.
The sports world will lose one of its oldest and dearest traditions tonight.
Tonight, one of the most cherished annual sporting traditions has been cancelled... the Oakland Raiders Melt-Down watch. Every year, sports fans wait with anticipation and great assurance that the Oakland Raiders franchise will implode. Fans watch patiently but eagerly for the almost comedic dismantling. They wait for 53 men to collectively make messy on themselves. Well tonight, sports fans come to grips with the reality that they'll have to wait another year, as it has already happened.
The Oakland Raiders set a club record tonight, imploding not only in the very first game of the season, but before the end of the first half. Fans from around the world were gearing up for the usual game three or game four bed-****ting, but the gift came early.... some say too early.
"I ran out for a six pack and before I could even get back home, these turds had racked up like 15 penalties," said Frank Chagaris of San Diego. Some local fans shared the same disappointment. "These ****ing clowns couldn't make it through the first half? The over/under for the melt-down was 3 games and I bet the over." said a man in a gorilla outfit who did not wish to be identified.
The cancellation was made official at half-time by league commissioner Roger Goodel. "We are sorry to say that the annual Raiders Melt-Down watch has been cancelled. It's hard for us to imagine grown men sinking further into their own **** than what we've all seen tonight. While we still expect the Raiders to be an embarrassment to our sport for years to come, we feel it's in the best interest of the fans not to get hopes up that anything could be worse than what we've seen tonight."
Rumors are already circulating that it could happen earlier next year. Adam Hoffler from Pro Football Talk blogged, "some people are saying this could have happened in the pre-season and we hear next year... it just might."
But, time marches on... sadly this year, without one of sports' most beloved traditions. Fans now must wait another 365 days for hope to be rekindled.... or will they?
11:30 pm Pacific ST
Story by Pete Goesinya
Associated Press Writer
OAKLAND (AP) - Sporting events mark the passing of time in ways almost as consistent as the calendars they're written upon. Whether it's the first crack of the bat in Spring Training, breakfast at Wimbledon or the firing of the gun at the Kentucky Derby, sports illuminate the passage of time as artistically as the turning seasons.
The sports world will lose one of its oldest and dearest traditions tonight.
Tonight, one of the most cherished annual sporting traditions has been cancelled... the Oakland Raiders Melt-Down watch. Every year, sports fans wait with anticipation and great assurance that the Oakland Raiders franchise will implode. Fans watch patiently but eagerly for the almost comedic dismantling. They wait for 53 men to collectively make messy on themselves. Well tonight, sports fans come to grips with the reality that they'll have to wait another year, as it has already happened.
The Oakland Raiders set a club record tonight, imploding not only in the very first game of the season, but before the end of the first half. Fans from around the world were gearing up for the usual game three or game four bed-****ting, but the gift came early.... some say too early.
"I ran out for a six pack and before I could even get back home, these turds had racked up like 15 penalties," said Frank Chagaris of San Diego. Some local fans shared the same disappointment. "These ****ing clowns couldn't make it through the first half? The over/under for the melt-down was 3 games and I bet the over." said a man in a gorilla outfit who did not wish to be identified.
The cancellation was made official at half-time by league commissioner Roger Goodel. "We are sorry to say that the annual Raiders Melt-Down watch has been cancelled. It's hard for us to imagine grown men sinking further into their own **** than what we've all seen tonight. While we still expect the Raiders to be an embarrassment to our sport for years to come, we feel it's in the best interest of the fans not to get hopes up that anything could be worse than what we've seen tonight."
Rumors are already circulating that it could happen earlier next year. Adam Hoffler from Pro Football Talk blogged, "some people are saying this could have happened in the pre-season and we hear next year... it just might."
But, time marches on... sadly this year, without one of sports' most beloved traditions. Fans now must wait another 365 days for hope to be rekindled.... or will they?