Breaker
06-19-2008, 01:08 AM
It will be interesting to see in the upcoming season whether or not Bob or the Steaming Pile of Poo selected by the Broncos in the 42cnd round of the draft will be a better long term player. Lets have a look at the scouting report:
Bob
Height: 3'11
Weight: 190 lbs
Wonderlic Score: 2
Nickname: Is it my Turn Yet Daddy?
Background: Four time 1st Team All Redneck Conference, led the RNC in food stamps used for family picnics. Led the RNC in Passing Gas three straight years and has the all time conference record for Passing Gas Yards at 50,000. Two time Academic Ineligible List recipient, and won the 2008 Ryan Leaf Award.
Strengths:
Overinflated opinion of his own self worth and no matter how many times he is proven wrong he comes back for more, has NFL caliber arm strength (due to his lack of a woman of any kind) and shows good athleticism for a pygmy. Shows good leverage in bending his knees and is often known for sliding laterally on any issue or opinion.
Weakness:
Not a very physical player, prefers to talk smack behind a keyboard then run and hide behind his mothers skirts.
Projection:
Steaming Pile of Poo's waterboy (gotta keep the poo properly hydrated)
Steaming Pile of Poo
Height: 3 inches
Weight: That is disgusting to think about
Nickname: Grumpy, Sir Grumpsalot, Lord GrumpyPants
Wonderlic Score: 5
Background:
Named 2008 MVP of the Toilet Bowl held in Kansas City, Two time ACC Smear of the Year, All Time ACC record for Smears in a career with 179. 1st Team all Dump in 2008 with 8 brown outs.
Strengths:
Physical player known for really getting under his opponents skin and plays with a mean streak, especially after Mexican Food. Spreads the defense well with his above average girth and relies on his superior intelligence to outwit diapers, toilet paper, and granny panties on a consistent basis.
Weakness:
Um he has no ****ing arms or legs, he just lies there like ... well a sh*t.
Projection:
Broncos Practice Squad or Chiefs Starting QB if he gets traded.
Bob
Height: 3'11
Weight: 190 lbs
Wonderlic Score: 2
Nickname: Is it my Turn Yet Daddy?
Background: Four time 1st Team All Redneck Conference, led the RNC in food stamps used for family picnics. Led the RNC in Passing Gas three straight years and has the all time conference record for Passing Gas Yards at 50,000. Two time Academic Ineligible List recipient, and won the 2008 Ryan Leaf Award.
Strengths:
Overinflated opinion of his own self worth and no matter how many times he is proven wrong he comes back for more, has NFL caliber arm strength (due to his lack of a woman of any kind) and shows good athleticism for a pygmy. Shows good leverage in bending his knees and is often known for sliding laterally on any issue or opinion.
Weakness:
Not a very physical player, prefers to talk smack behind a keyboard then run and hide behind his mothers skirts.
Projection:
Steaming Pile of Poo's waterboy (gotta keep the poo properly hydrated)
Steaming Pile of Poo
Height: 3 inches
Weight: That is disgusting to think about
Nickname: Grumpy, Sir Grumpsalot, Lord GrumpyPants
Wonderlic Score: 5
Background:
Named 2008 MVP of the Toilet Bowl held in Kansas City, Two time ACC Smear of the Year, All Time ACC record for Smears in a career with 179. 1st Team all Dump in 2008 with 8 brown outs.
Strengths:
Physical player known for really getting under his opponents skin and plays with a mean streak, especially after Mexican Food. Spreads the defense well with his above average girth and relies on his superior intelligence to outwit diapers, toilet paper, and granny panties on a consistent basis.
Weakness:
Um he has no ****ing arms or legs, he just lies there like ... well a sh*t.
Projection:
Broncos Practice Squad or Chiefs Starting QB if he gets traded.