Mock's Monster

[watermock]

You can move this but my kitten has hit his prime. He's become a monster. I just saw him jump 8'x4' effortlessly onto a small landing. He's finally in his prime, and I've had cats that I thought were fast. I have been training him by whirling a shoelace back and forth, and I can't whip the shoelace fast enough. He is either catching it before I can whip it, or catching it mid air and retrieving it and dumping it for me. I threw one too far and he flew into the wall, at least 8 feet by 2 high...the string fell behind the bed, he went in and still retrieved the shoelace without even blinking. He jumps onto my shoulder and relaunches if he wants attention. He has been seen on top of the house 5 times, who knows how he gets there. I see him fly from the house to the garage, but it's a detached garage.

Why is this in the football thread you ask? I have this kid catching flying shoestrings. I honestly think he can run a 2.1 30 and seems to have a 48 inch vertical. So if anyone is interested in giving Beezer a shot at WR, PM me. OBTW, he prefers night games, since Denver seems to suck at night, it's an extra bonus.

BTW, the cat below is a true African Wildcat, Beezer has longer legs and is slightly domesticated, that is his Uncle who played Linebacker for the Libyan Leapers.

[broncogary]

... I just saw him jump 8'x4' effortlessly onto a small landing... . I threw one too far and he flew into the wall, at least 8 feet by 2 high...

Rediculous. :griese:

[watermock]

I am dead serious. He jumped over a queen bed onto a 12x12 CD case 4' high. Trust me, I couldn't believe it either. I have stopped looking for him on the roof of the house. This is a regular house. I'm outside a couple weeks ago and this lady says "There is a cat on your house.." He has even had an ankle injury "unknown" that he favors, but his wabbit legs launch him. I took him to the old man who said it wasn't broken. He might have a bit of a problem in breaking clean to the right still, or he just likes to favor it a little yet.

[broncohaven]

My assumptions have never been more strongly confirmed.

[broncogary]

Hey, how's the golf game, Haven? I hit a 300x200 yard drive the other day.

[watermock]

I would believe a 200x100 slice.

[broncogary]

No, it was a 200 yard hook.

[Ratboy]

:spit: that is f*n hilarious!!!!

[watermock]

I should clarify. His ankles are fine, he had a sprained wrist, but the Old man said just a sprain, and that was 3 months ago. If you threw up a shoestring, he can grab it in this fangs and take it to the house...(That is if he doesn't turn around and ask you do do it again by dropping it at your feet).

This cat retrieves. We might need to break that habit. You throw the shoe string long...BEEZER HAS IT...wait a minute, he's pulling a Jim Marshall, he's running the wrong way....he drops it back at the QB's feet....

Maybe he would be better as a Defensive Cat.

[broncohaven]

Hey, how's the golf game, Haven? I hit a 300x200 yard drive the other day.
I have a buddy who would count that as a 600 yarder. The game is pretty solid right now, i'm headed to Florida for the winter, and the Canadian PGA Tour next season (sort of like NFL Europe). Hopefully I'll be representing the OM on the PGA Tour in 2006 (TJ I'm gonna need a hat).

This is all of course assuming that I don't step inside the strike zone of "Mock's Monster".

[watermock]

Your safe, I haven't taught him to catch 330 yard drives and drop them back at the tee. A Golf Ball is too big for him.

I might be able to have him smack it into the rough or OB tho. If it moves, he will chase it. (within reason). I guarantee you that you don't want Beezer chasing that ball into the weeds.

Since your always OB or in the rough, he might be a good spotter.

[Crushaholic]

I hear KC is in the market for a WR. However, if he's smaller than even Dante Hall, it might not work out there. Besides, Chef fans have probably had their fill of felines after Sylvester "The Cat" Morris...

[broncogary]

Since your always OB or in the rough, he might be a good spotter.

I thought Beezer hadn't managed to keep track of his own balls. :~ohyah!: