View Full Version : Craigslist ad NSFW

11-13-2015, 09:47 AM
I'm looking for a winter car and came across this piece of gold. I had to post this.


Hi there, I got a mint ass unit here for sale. It's a 96 jeep cherokee, but wait, it's not your ordinary cheap **** junker your cousin drives here. This thing is a mint ass piece of engineering. It comes factory equipped with a rear windshield wiper to wipe away all that p***Y you'll be getting from cruising around in this hot date. It also comes with a 5 speed manual tranny with 40k on the new heavy duty gabbing clutch for all that p***Y you'll get in this thing. The unit has 173k miles, but don't let that fool ya, it's a 4.0l inline 6 which means you can't blow it up cause its a beast.
Now let me list of a couple of pros of this thing, out of the million there is
It's got 2.5 percent window tint that away you can cruise down the highway gettin road head, or even in rush hour traffic, you can't see in!
It's got dropstar rim on her wrapped in nitto highway terrains with 1k miles on em, brand spanking new basically
Has aftermarket headlights with 10 hids just in case you're worried about seeing anything, you'll be seeing everything even the people in the car in front of you.
It ****in rips
It hauls Santa's sleigh
It's got a nice exhaust so it's pretty loud and ****, but sounds orgasmic
Has aftermarket sound system with head unit and alpine speakers all the way around

Cons of this vehicle are as followed
It's got rocker rust but still fixable
Your fat lady friend won't fit, no room cause the thing is a jeep, unless you wanna put her in the back with the seats down

Other than that this thing is a mint ****in unit. I hate to get rid of her but I'm goin off to be a dodge ram homo because it has a bed for all the p***Y my new vehicle will get. Before you call or text me about this jeep, you gotta fax me a picture of your hammer and berries just so I can make sure that youve got what it takes to get behind the wheel of this p***Y haulin, panty droppin, 215 hp torque monster jeep. If you got what it takes I'll sell this jeep to you for the deal of a century of 2800 dollars. Even if your ugly like me, you'll be able to get the hottest of ass, just look at my girlfriend. You think my face did that? Hell no, p***Y haulin jeep did!