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View Full Version : How bad do the Atlanta Falcons beat us this week?


Doggcow
09-13-2012, 10:03 PM
I think they beat us so bad that Matt Ryan runs over to the Denver sidelines, then yells "This One's For John!" and punches Bowlen in the throat. The league fines us after said incident, saying we deserved it.

theAPAOps5
09-13-2012, 10:12 PM
They beat us so bad that the NFL enacts a little known rule that credits them with winning Superbowl 33 and their scrub ass cornerback Ray Buchanan has his dog collar sent to canton.

Kaylore
09-13-2012, 10:24 PM
The Falcons will have intensity and quote Yoda from Star Wars. They will rise up. They will make fun of fans who think they will lose just like when they played football <s>in middle school</s>. Grimes is hurt, but they will just run screens to stop the pass rush, yet somehow also go deep. They will always throw screens when there's a blitz and go long when the Broncos rush four or less because of magic. Nolan will call an exotic and new magical defense from the tenth dimension, the only dimension where they play football that Manning hasn't seen, and he will be confused all the time and pee his pants. Decker and Thomas aren't even football players. Matt Ryan is going to be better than Peyton Manning according to a poll. The Broncos can't handle playing in a Dome because going from the cold outdoors to the climate-controlled interior or a dome with a QB who played in a dome his whole career is impossible. Super Bowl 33 will be avenged. Denver won't score more than ten points.

theAPAOps5
09-13-2012, 10:28 PM
Well Mod team. Lets lock and sticky this thread. No one is going to come remotely close to nailing the end result like Kaylore just did.

The Falcons will have intensity and quote Yoda from Star Wars. They will rise up. They will make fun of fans who think they will lose just like when they played football <s>in middle school</s>. Grimes is hurt, but they will just run screens to stop the pass rush, yet somehow also go deep. They will always throw screens when there's a blitz and go long when the Broncos rush four or less because of magic. Nolan will call an exotic and new magical defense from the tenth dimension, the only dimension where they play football that Manning hasn't seen, and he will be confused all the time and pee his pants. Decker and Thomas aren't even football players. Matt Ryan is going to be better than Peyton Manning according to a poll. The Broncos can't handle playing in a Dome because going from the outdoors to the cold with a QB who played in a dome his whole career is impossible. Super Bowl 33 will be avenged. Denver won't score more than ten points.

NFLBRONCO
09-13-2012, 10:37 PM
Atl will beat us 62-17 and Atl fans start reserving tickets for SB on tuesday 18th.

razorwire77
09-13-2012, 10:50 PM
The Broncos can't handle playing in a Dome because going from the outdoors to the cold with a QB who played in a dome his whole career is impossible.

LOL

They beat us so badly that MC Hammer watches the game on the sideline and writes a new billboard hit called 2 Legit 2 reattach Peyton's head and it goes triple platinum.

They beat us so badly that prior to the game they sign Shane Dronett to a one game contract just so he can do that little shovel dance over Manning's corpse.

Miss I.
09-13-2012, 10:54 PM
Denver loses so badly, when asked at the presser afterwards if he ever dreamed of playing in a game so badly, Peyton Manning answers sarcastically, "Yes man I always dream of playing like Jay Cutler."

DBroncos4life
09-13-2012, 10:55 PM
The Falcons will have intensity and quote Yoda from Star Wars. They will rise up. They will make fun of fans who think they will lose just like when they played football <s>in middle school</s>. Grimes is hurt, but they will just run screens to stop the pass rush, yet somehow also go deep. They will always throw screens when there's a blitz and go long when the Broncos rush four or less because of magic. Nolan will call an exotic and new magical defense from the tenth dimension, the only dimension where they play football that Manning hasn't seen, and he will be confused all the time and pee his pants. Decker and Thomas aren't even football players. Matt Ryan is going to be better than Peyton Manning according to a poll. The Broncos can't handle playing in a Dome because going from the cold outdoors to the climate-controlled interior or a dome with a QB who played in a dome his whole career is impossible. Super Bowl 33 will be avenged. Denver won't score more than ten points.

LOL game over

Taco John
09-13-2012, 11:15 PM
They will beat us so bad that Elway will award the Falcons a retroactive superbowl win. Just as John Elway hands Eugene Robinson a retro MVP award at the 50 yard line, 53 prostitutes will parachute into the stadium, only to reveal themselves as cops and arrest every Bronco player for blowing during the game.

Mogulseeker
09-13-2012, 11:35 PM
They beat us so bad that the NFL enacts a little known rule that credits them with winning Superbowl 33 and their scrub ass cornerback Ray Buchanan has his dog collar sent to canton.

Hilarious!

/thread

BroncoMan4ever
09-13-2012, 11:58 PM
The Falcons will have intensity and quote Yoda from Star Wars. They will rise up. They will make fun of fans who think they will lose just like when they played football <s>in middle school</s>. Grimes is hurt, but they will just run screens to stop the pass rush, yet somehow also go deep. They will always throw screens when there's a blitz and go long when the Broncos rush four or less because of magic. Nolan will call an exotic and new magical defense from the tenth dimension, the only dimension where they play football that Manning hasn't seen, and he will be confused all the time and pee his pants. Decker and Thomas aren't even football players. Matt Ryan is going to be better than Peyton Manning according to a poll. The Broncos can't handle playing in a Dome because going from the cold outdoors to the climate-controlled interior or a dome with a QB who played in a dome his whole career is impossible. Super Bowl 33 will be avenged. Denver won't score more than ten points.
I was gonna post in this thread, but after this post everything else is just competing for 2nd best

DAN_BRONCO_FAN
09-14-2012, 12:28 AM
there is no hope we can win lets not even go falcons 999 denver minus 99999999999999 we bronco fans might as well just all kill ourselves no use in living

canadianbroncosfan
09-14-2012, 05:33 AM
The Falcons beat the Broncos so bad that MLB feels so terrible that they retroactively award the Rockies the 1995 NLDS over the Braves

Vegas_Bronco
09-14-2012, 05:49 AM
We lose so bad that turner and mcgahee have a stick and tire each trying to compete for who has the most tread left out in the parking lot...tony gonzales actually goes home to his wife instead of sleeping around with the best looking shewhore with a camera...and matt ryan gets reverse sacked on every replay because the score is 1993-0...clabo and wolfe kiss prior to gametime because they intimately 'tweeted' and everyone wonders what clabo sees in wolfe..and mike nolan and mcd ride the lobster one last time on revs bed...while he watches from the nursing chair too beat up to move because some confederate militia man kicked his azz for writing a book about how hellatious it is to have nice climate contolled rooms, modern beds and warm showers as a marine.

TheReverend
09-14-2012, 05:59 AM
They beat us so badly (inspired strictly out of vengeance over the MethWolfe twitter account) that Matt Ryan is voted the Sexiest Man Alive
















(I'm aware how little sense it makes, that's what is amusing me about it)

TheReverend
09-14-2012, 06:04 AM
The Falcons will have intensity and quote Yoda from Star Wars. They will rise up. They will make fun of fans who think they will lose just like when they played football <s>in middle school</s>. Grimes is hurt, but they will just run screens to stop the pass rush, yet somehow also go deep. They will always throw screens when there's a blitz and go long when the Broncos rush four or less because of magic. Nolan will call an exotic and new magical defense from the tenth dimension, the only dimension where they play football that Manning hasn't seen, and he will be confused all the time and pee his pants. Decker and Thomas aren't even football players. Matt Ryan is going to be better than Peyton Manning according to a poll. The Broncos can't handle playing in a Dome because going from the cold outdoors to the climate-controlled interior or a dome with a QB who played in a dome his whole career is impossible. Super Bowl 33 will be avenged. Denver won't score more than ten points.

http://i975.photobucket.com/albums/ae239/istoleallthese/LolNice.gif

canadianbroncosfan
09-14-2012, 06:18 AM
The Falcons will have intensity and quote Yoda from Star Wars. They will rise up. They will make fun of fans who think they will lose just like when they played football <s>in middle school</s>. Grimes is hurt, but they will just run screens to stop the pass rush, yet somehow also go deep. They will always throw screens when there's a blitz and go long when the Broncos rush four or less because of magic. Nolan will call an exotic and new magical defense from the tenth dimension, the only dimension where they play football that Manning hasn't seen, and he will be confused all the time and pee his pants. Decker and Thomas aren't even football players. Matt Ryan is going to be better than Peyton Manning according to a poll. The Broncos can't handle playing in a Dome because going from the cold outdoors to the climate-controlled interior or a dome with a QB who played in a dome his whole career is impossible. Super Bowl 33 will be avenged. Denver won't score more than ten points.

Hilarious! Hilarious! Hilarious! Hilarious! Hilarious! Hilarious!

JLesSPE
09-14-2012, 06:28 AM
The Falcons will have intensity and quote Yoda from Star Wars. They will rise up. They will make fun of fans who think they will lose just like when they played football <s>in middle school</s>. Grimes is hurt, but they will just run screens to stop the pass rush, yet somehow also go deep. They will always throw screens when there's a blitz and go long when the Broncos rush four or less because of magic. Nolan will call an exotic and new magical defense from the tenth dimension, the only dimension where they play football that Manning hasn't seen, and he will be confused all the time and pee his pants. Decker and Thomas aren't even football players. Matt Ryan is going to be better than Peyton Manning according to a poll. The Broncos can't handle playing in a Dome because going from the cold outdoors to the climate-controlled interior or a dome with a QB who played in a dome his whole career is impossible. Super Bowl 33 will be avenged. Denver won't score more than ten points.

Immediately following the game Kaylore is appointed President due to his amazing prophetic abilities. His first decision as pres. is to appoint Req Secretary of the MWA. The legend of Kaylore the prophet quickly spreads across the planet. Muslims extremists everywhere realize the true Mohammad resides in the West and cease their violent ways. This is the first step towards true world peace. All middle eastern oil supplies are donated to the US as penance for transgressions and gas prices fall to a national average of $0.87/gallon. Kaylore and Req then declare two national holidays. National Meth Wolf day where the accepted celebration is to smoke as much meth as you can and dress up like a wolf. The other is a national day of mourning for all of those that have died in meth lab explosions.

uplink
09-14-2012, 05:49 PM
Broncos loose so bad a bunch of Aliens, hiding their ship behind Jupiter watching the game, will feel obligated to revel themselves to Earth in order to take the entire Broncos team and organization off to a distant mining planet to serve as workers and a food source. The aliens replace the broncos roster and office personnel on Earth with cyborg robots made to all look and act like Jay Cutler as punishment.

lolcopter
09-14-2012, 05:56 PM
They beat us so bad they bring back the official officiating crews.

Dr. Broncenstein
09-14-2012, 06:09 PM
I, for one, welcome our dirty bird overlords.

Jay3
09-14-2012, 06:10 PM
The Falcons will be so far ahead that by the third quarter, Peyton will say "Go ahead, whatever you want to call, Mike."

Vegas_Bronco
09-14-2012, 06:55 PM
Immediately following the game Kaylore is appointed President due to his amazing prophetic abilities. His first decision as pres. is to appoint Req Secretary of the MWA. The legend of Kaylore the prophet quickly spreads across the planet. Muslims extremists everywhere realize the true Mohammad resides in the West and cease their violent ways. This is the first step towards true world peace. All middle eastern oil supplies are donated to the US as penance for transgressions and gas prices fall to a national average of $0.87/gallon. Kaylore and Req then declare two national holidays. National Meth Wolf day where the accepted celebration is to smoke as much meth as you can and dress up like a wolf. The other is a national day of mourning for all of those that have died in meth lab explosions.

Who cares if they die cooking meth...business is business.

Marshall Dumervil
09-14-2012, 07:09 PM
We lose so bad, Robinson's hooker shows up with her old ass and gives freebies to the whole team because she feels sorry for us.

ColoradoDarin
09-14-2012, 07:16 PM
We lose so bad, Derek Wolfe's new nickname is just Wolfe.

TD4HOF
09-14-2012, 07:21 PM
We lose so bad, colorful Disney pigeons appear out of nowhere to soothe the downtrodden players.

TerrElway
09-14-2012, 07:23 PM
Why are we even talking about this? Denver lost so bad the beating went back in time and killed John Connor. Matt Ryan IS Skynet.

uplink
09-14-2012, 07:39 PM
loose so bad Bowlen decided to give up drinking

*WARHORSE*
09-15-2012, 01:59 AM
Yoda will not appreciate being quoted and will come to quote himself multiple times:

"Beat them we will....."

"Matt...........Peytons youure fahtherh"

"Do not see.............BE."

Peyton, mesmerized by Yoda, drops back and pitches every ball forward to a dancing defensive lineman for a score, never looking from under his Obi Wan hoodie with a Billicheck and Josh McD signatures on it with the note: "Reunited and it Feels So Goooood."

It gets so bad that Elway makes a halftime trade for Tim Tebow, who comes out of the tunnel in the second half with a scripture in his eyeblack: Zebedee 17:20

Tebow Tebows after every snap cause all he can think to do is pray, cause the score is already 401 to zipper.

It gets so bad, Atlanta feels bad sending out the third string in the fourth quarter, thereby opening it up to the public to play.

Hearing the news, PrimeTime, Rich Eisen, Bad Moon Rison, Kurt Warner, Marshall Faulk, Willie McGinnest and Michael Irvin get in on the show and run another 209 pts up in eight minutes of play.

Yoda puts on a darth mask and disappears into the Nth dimension where Peyton ran to with Archie Bunker and the boys.

Cutler comes to the sidelines and tells the Atlanta secondary, "Good luck" dealing with the Broncos huge WRs, and says he hopes the 'idiots' play bump and run.

Boomers says WHUP! as hes running for the parking lot, and Arthur Blank passes out.

Thats how bad the Atlanta Awesome Freaking Falcons are gonna beat us!!!!

v2micca
09-15-2012, 06:20 AM
They Beat us so badly, by the Third Quarter they call up Jason Heyward and Freddie Freeman from next door and ask them if they are interested in some playing time.

Que
09-15-2012, 06:36 AM
I, for one, welcome our dirty bird overlords.

QFT

Que
09-15-2012, 06:40 AM
We lose so bad that we trade Manning to the Jets for Tebow and our decision to leave the NFL and launch an arena football league cause this time it will be different.

Dr. Broncenstein
09-15-2012, 06:52 AM
We lose so badly that TGN comes down from the ledge... full of optimism after assuming Orton and McDaniels must be back... and last year was just a bad dream.

bowtown
09-15-2012, 06:57 AM
They beat us so bad Left-Eye Lopez rebuilds Andre Rison's mansion.

Dr. Broncenstein
09-15-2012, 07:00 AM
They beat us so bad Left-Eye Lopez rebuilds Andre Rison's mansion.

Zombie Phoenix rep

Dr. Broncenstein
09-15-2012, 07:03 AM
Talk about sticking your dick in crazy. Andre Rison's dead ex girlfriend used to wear a condom eyepatch before she burned his house down. If only he could have seen that one coming.

bowtown
09-15-2012, 07:11 AM
Zombie Phoenix rep

You had to know she'd be back for us all one day.

broncolife
09-15-2012, 01:27 PM
They will beat the broncos so much the broncos will bust a nut and die from dehydration

broncolife
09-15-2012, 01:36 PM
They will beat us so bad that they will make a law saying that all beet juice must have a broncos logo on it.

Miss I.
09-15-2012, 01:39 PM
We lose so badly, everything goes opposite. OM becomes a love in run by Blue and Rev, who hold hands walk through daisies singing about buying the world a coke. Jay Cutler never throws another interception, Brandon Marshall donates all his money to women's abuse shelters and quits the NFL to become a Tibetan Monk. Peyton Manning and Caleb Hanie switch, with PM being the 3rd string behind Twilight. and all reps on the OM become positive love bombs...

broncolife
09-15-2012, 01:40 PM
They will beat us so bad all male bronco fans will have to sacrafice both nuts just to stay within 50 points.

broncosteven
09-15-2012, 02:07 PM
They will beat us so bad all male bronco fans will have to sacrafice both nuts just to stay within 50 points.

This would have been a winner if Kahn didn't bring the heat this week.

LOL

razorwire77
09-15-2012, 02:56 PM
They beat us so badly that in honor of Dan Reeves they only run three plays (off tackle left, off tackle right and a full back dive) for the entire game.

Punisher
09-15-2012, 04:27 PM
After the first half the score being 69-0 Peyton Manning decides to retire in the halftime show with hes bronco jersey still on.

ZONA
09-15-2012, 04:37 PM
They don't beat us and these types of threads are stupid :strong:

DAN_BRONCO_FAN
09-15-2012, 05:51 PM
They don't beat us and these types of threads are stupid :strong:

oh hush its reverse mojo and its fun now stop being such a debbie downer and join in

DAN_BRONCO_FAN
09-15-2012, 05:56 PM
Denver gets beaten so bad the orange mane will become the dirty birds forum the broncos will be chased out of town by the citizens of Colorado to Nome Alaska where they be welcome to play in the Alaska football league which consist of a a couple of clueless native Alaskans a iceberg and a man eating polar bear

canadianbroncosfan
09-15-2012, 08:52 PM
They don't beat us and these types of threads are stupid :strong:

I'm going to go into a thread that I think is stupid just to say how stupid I think it is.

Gort
09-16-2012, 06:47 AM
the Falcons will beat the Broncos so bad... on Tuesday, Larry Page and Sergey Brin will sue Atlanta for trademark infringement.

/thread

orinjkrush
09-17-2012, 10:31 AM
Matt Ryan is so awesome, he won't actually throw the ball, he will just immediately WILL it to the receivers. The receivers are so awesome, they won't actually run routes, they will just move the earth and the broncos around them. The defense is so awesome, it will just sit on the bench and allow the 12th man to tackle every bronco on every play with acoustic ear bleeding shots. And the Falcons coaches are so awesome, they will Tsun Zu reverse psychology all mammalian brains and cause broncos, dolphins and whales to suicidal-ly beach themselves within 2.3 parsecs.

theAPAOps5
09-17-2012, 03:43 PM
Atlanta will beat us so had that Michael Bay will make a movie about the events that unfold tonight. There will be no plot, but amazing special effects of Matt Ryan blowing up Joe Mays with passes to Tony Gonzales and cut scenes to Champ Bailey saying, "**** just got real"